THANKSGIVING - Did the Ex Call?

[skynet74]

Breaks ups are hard enough to deal with, but they are even harder around the Holidays. Is there anyone here who expected an Ex to call with a Happy Thanksgiving message...... BUT THE CALL NEVER CAME? Same goes for e-mail. Anyone expect at least a Card or a little message on this special day and not get it?

 

I haven't spoken to my Ex in two months. She was a creep to me after the break up. I thought that two months without talking might have been enough time for her to try and be civil around the holidays. Especially seeing we were together for 10 years! However I never did hear from her today on Thanksgiving. I realize that I could have called her. But it's no longer up to me. She initiated the break up. So I feel the ball is in her court and it's up to her to get in touch if she wishes.

 

 

 

John

[EnolWolf]

I wasn't expecting anything from her at all. Although I did stop by, for her family's sake, I didn't care what she was doing. She got jealous when she found out that I wasn't staying and was going to meet my girlfriends parents.

 

I'm so glad I let her go!

[ReadyorNot]

It wasnt technically Thanksgiving for me... and Im not exactly sure if he is the ex.... its up in the air.... but I saw him tonight... things MAY be looking great for our relationship... we both realized what we need to change.. dont know if he can keep his end of the bargain up...

 

I hope by the time I am 36 I am not still screwing around with boyfriends and dating.. I better be someones wife by then....

 

Sorry your ex didnt call skynet74.... 10 years is along time to be with someone and then have them just blow you off for good... I dont understand people.. Sorry hun!

[SkyFire]

Who cares about exes?

[skynet74]

Who cares about exes?

 

 

Ya know.... Sometimes I believe that is absolutely the best attitude to have!

 

 

John

[FiveHorizons]

I had originally planned on not emailing a Thanskgiving wish, but then I thought "This is stupid, this isnt me." and I emailed a simple warm wish type of thing. I got the same in return. But I doubt she would have sent anything had I not. It pisses me off. She's the one who did the break up, she's the one who wantes to be friends, yet she's the one who never initiates any contact. It really angers me that someone can just go from telling you that you're a very special important person in their life to not even acting as if you exist. Our breakup was so ridiculous and full of simple miscommunication and sudden embrace of hardcore religion (yeah, religion) that I shouldn't even try to wrap my rational brain around it. And to think, I'm the one being cool about everything.

[skynet74]

She's the one who did the break up, she's the one who wantes to be friends, yet she's the one who never initiates any contact. It really angers me that someone can just go from telling you that you're a very special important person in their life to not even acting as if you exist.quote]

 

 

 

WOW...... That sure sounds like my situation! Following my break up... I asked my EX if she still wanted to remain friends. She responded with an "I WOULD ABSOLUTELY LOVE THAT! I ALWAYS WANT YOU TO BE IN MY LIFE SOMEHOW".

 

Hmmm.... that's interesting. I can count on one hand the amount of times she called me after that. That is since the month of May! That's some way to keep me in her life.. isn't it? Now she doesn't even call at all. I wish I knew what is going through someones mind when they say something like she did. Then at least I could possibly understand. As it stands... it still doesn't make any sense to me at all.

 

 

 

John

[FiveHorizons]

She's gonna wake up one day and realize what a mistake she made. Then it will be your turn to either use her handbook or to be the better person.

 

My breakup wasn't really on bad terms. They were...confusing and ridiculous terms, and I'm not totally convinced I got ALL of the info I wanted about what led to it, but I'm still hurt by it.

 

But I'm thankful in that she has a good head on her shoulders and won't allow herself to be used or pressured into anything she doesnt want to do with her new acquaintance. She's very much focused on God and I trust that she honestly feels that what she's doing right now is the right thing, and not out of selfishness or spite. I feel that there is a chance we shall reunite, but I'm not sure how or when. She says "It's up to God" which I agree with quite a bit, yet on the other hand, I also know that it isnt gonna just miraculously happen without trying (and it sure as hell isnt gonna happen while she goes on dates with others.) Perhaps I'll actually write a post sometime of what went down and get opinions.

 

Anyway, don't sweat it man. You're doing well it sounds like. Keep your chin up.

[DBL]

I wouldn't hold your breaths waiting for your x's to wake up and realize they made a mistake. Just doesn't happen often enough to even think of that, but I know that thought is what gets some of you guys by for now.

 

I didn't expect my x to call...she doesn't even have my phone number. I don't have hers either. When they let your birthday go by...then you know it is a done deal.

 

DBL

[kalshane]

I'm surprised that she TM'd me. It was sweet and she told me that she wanted to talk soon and that she missed me.(We broke up less than a week ago). I TM'd her back and just wished her a happy thanksgiving. If she wouldn't have done it first, I wouldn't have done anything because I just wasn't ready to make any first move. I guess I'm still sad about things even though it was I that initiated the break up.

[rich46]

Who cares about exes?

That is quite possibly the best post I've ever read on here!

[jr71]

I didn't expect the turkey day call - but when I didn't get it I had a dull pain in my chest -- well ..all day and today. It's been 4 months and I've come along way but all of a sudden I feel the way I do when it first happened... I guess holiday's will do that to you. I've been cleaning for the past 3 hours - getting my mind off of it - maybe I should just keep vacuming for the next 6 months

 

I got the same line - let's be friends I can't imagine you not in my life - such crap..

[fantasia2004]

if they don't call then don't call them be thankful that the hurt is gone and you are no longer looking and feeling like a turkey

[Marketa]

Mine called. Mine calls everyday, I think its crazy that he is so worried about my feelings even though he was the one that hurt me and now he lives with a woman but still calls at least once a day if not more. Mine was a cheat when I met him and a cheat when I left him. We are friends now and I think its funny that he is in the house with her and calling me.

 

Its nice if you can be firends until you get over it. We never talk about her or his plans we just talk generally. I do love him but would never take him back but I am still happy he made time to call me. If he didnt I wouldnt believe that he wanted to remain friends since he always calls for every holiday even if we were in a fight or broken up.

 

For those who's mates didnt call you are better off without them. If they cant even call you can clearly see they are not worth your thoughts or time.

 

Sad but in a way I kinda hope he wouldnt call so I can accept my frist holiday without him but each day I am healing a little more.

 

Hope everyone had a happy holiday

[sugarplum_pdx]

My birthday was a few days before Thanksgiving, and he didn't contact me for either one. We've been broken up for 8 months, but have been talking online fairly regularly for a while. We were getting along pretty well and I thought he would contact me on my b-day, but just 2 days before that day, I had an upsetting conversation with him.

 

I called him to tell him I might be going to the same show he was going to one night, and he told me he was going with someone else. A girl. He wanted to warn me so I wouldn't be surprised. Well, needless to say, I didn't go to the show because I didn't want to see that. Anyway, it was an uncomfortable conversation and I think he felt bad and awkward and he stopped talking to me. I think that's why he decided not to contact me on my b-day.

 

Finally today, a week later, he messaged me and asked how my b-day and Thanksgiving were. I just said "good." Didn't elaborate or ask how his was. It's pointless now, you know? I might've appreciated a birthday wish on the actual day, but to ask me a week later how it went is just hollow.

[fantasia2004]

My sentiments exactly. My ex had the nerve to ask why I didn't call yet I did all the calling before! Please give me A BREAK !I know in time if he cares or not.Just by calling for the holidays. It will say it all space or not.

 

i

[ebola316]

John, I know what you mean about the holidays. He left 2 days after Thanksgiving and now I have to face the prospect of a Christmas alone in a strange town where I know no-one and have no relatives. I could probably drive down to relatives in NYC for Christmas, but it depends on the weather-being I'm sitting on top of a mountain. The dog is making me feel more depressed, because she keeps looking out the window for him, and then I feel sorry for her and even sorrier for myself. I hope these feelings get better, because they couldn't get any worse.

[Vert]

My ex IM'd me over Thanksgiving. We kept our conversation civil for the most part, and didn't divulge any personal details. Here are some interesting quotes from her though:

 

In respect to buying and sending christmas cards -- "so i will send you one too...i bought them before i realized that i had no one to send them too!"

 

In respect to her renewing her cell phone plan -- oh true...i didn't think about that...i just have no one that calls me!!"

 

She admitted to reading my weblog and it keeps her "up-to-date".

 

I wrote off all that as Thanksgiving weekend "contact the ex" syndrome. As my friend asked me when I told him about it -- "did you tell her to go F* off?"