Did I accidentally put an expiration date on this?

[stayClimbing]

Hello all. I'm a 23M, she's a 22F. We've been casually dating for the past approximately 6 weeks. We've had sex twice and it's been really great. We get along great and have similar interests and hobbies but just enough to keep it good.

 

Anyway, we were hanging out last night. Today we were also hanging out and I mentioned how we just met not too long ago and that I don't want to put a label on anything and how I don't normally do relationships but I don't want her to think that I didn't want one with her, that it should instead come organically. She agreed and mentioned how her last relationship, she felt pressured to do what her ex wanted her to do. I didn't really know what to say but just said something about how we are both in transition (I'm hoping for med school / looking for work and she just graduated and is looking for work) and it's better if we not rush anything and just again do the organic process. She agreed.

 

But I was discussing this with one of my close friends and he said that I screwed up by even bringing this up and that it should've gone unspoken and now it's gonna be weird and that this is destined to end at some point. I'm extremely nervous. We are supposed to hang out Friday. I feel like I said the wrong things now and I want to talk to her and just tell her that 'I like her but past experience has me nervous and anxious and as a result I want to take things slow' and just see what she says. What do you guys think? By the way I like this girl, a lot. I don't know *** I was thinking when I said any of that

 

Oh yeah and I mentioned lets just keep it casual for now and see where it goes. That's the part where my friend was like "Why in the world did you even bring that up"

[NorthDallas40]

I say stop talking about where the relationship is going and just have fun. If she brings things up, fine - discuss it. But if she doesn't, stop making things so serious so early. After only 6 weeks nobody should be putting labels on anything, or even worrying about it IMO.

[stayClimbing]

Yeah it just came up after we had sex last night kind of naturally. So you suggest just not bringing it up again and continue to make plans and hang out?

[Trinity11]

Go on as normal. I am sure in a few months one of you will bring it up again and you can reassess where you are at.

[stayClimbing]

Thanks for all the advice. We made tentative plans yesterday to hang out on Friday. I texted her last night around midnight with some music I thought she'd like. I figured she was sleeping so I sent a follow up text about how I'd text her today about tomorrow (Friday). She said she might be busy Friday but I figured it'd be worth a shot to hang out.

 

I texted her today around 3 and she never responded. An hour later she posted a picture on Instagram. I know she's an independent girl and all but idk how to feel about this. She hasn't replied yet. We also made tentative plans to watch a movie next week Thursday night (midnight premiere). I don't know how to approach this. I don't know why she is doing this stuff. She flaked on me basically I feel like (because she said she tries not to flake but sometimes does and I stressed to her how much I hate people that flake). Maybe that's incorrect thinking, I don't know. How do I approach this now??? Did I ruin things???

[mhowe]

You have been dating 6 weeks and you basically told her you don't see it going anywhere.

I would expect she will flake.a.lot more.

[stayClimbing]

You have been dating 6 weeks and you basically told her you don't see it going anywhere.

I would expect she will flake.a.lot more.

 

The past 6 days I've been thinking about this nonstop. I want to tell her that's not what I meant. I want to be exclusive with her. I'm so nervous and intimidated to bring this issue up. I have extremely limited experience in this department and just don't know how to bring it up. We're hanging out tomorrow evening at a party I invited her to, lot of mutual friends there. Somebody please help me. I want to tell her that I don't want to be casual, we don't need to label anything but I want to be exclusive with her...

 

Also we are watching Man of Steel Thursday night at midnight

[StayTrueToYou]

You should just tell her that then. Stop playing games and be honest with her (and yourself)

[stayClimbing]

Tough lesson learned here. I think I lost her? Idk. She just got an internship and we haven't hung out at all. I texted her if she wanted to get dinner tonight and she didn't reply at all. She's been tweeting like crazy and is at a party, it's her friends birthday. All well and good but damn do I feel unwanted