My hoarding mother...

[Not a rookie]

So nowadays when I clean her place, if she on the phone with my aunt, she will tell her SHE is the one cleaning not me. She will be like oh yeah, I cleaned the kitchen etc. But in reality it is me doing all of that. I assume she is saying that so my aunt does pressure her to unclutter again.

I gave up cleaning my parents other apartment. The closets, the drawers are all filled. With paper, with old stuff that is useless. The house is packed except the rooms which are shown to guests.

[Not a rookie]

I'd suggest helping yourself. I had a bad childhood and I haven't seen my parents physically in two years and I feel like myself. Whenever I was living with them, I felt insane and emotionally drained. Sometimes you have to go away just to be happy and at peace. And I'd suggest, if there's a way, try to entangle yourself from getting their debt. Cut ties. IMO, it works wonder.

 

Ok so where we currently live, that would be Germany, I get to inherit all their debt. But there are certain rules to debt. I am going to consult a lawyer about that. I fear they also own other debt and I think they might have taken a mortgage on their houses. I found out few weeks ago that they wanted me to take a out a huge loan five years ago cause they took out a huge loan ten years ago. They were going to stuff their debt hole with the money I was to borrow from the bank. Their houses are in their home country. I have decided some time ago I don't want their wealth nor their debt. So I am going to talk to a lawyer about that too.

 

For the individual who have sent me a nasty personal message about my life and this issue: I've worked since I was 16 and that almost full time while studying. I am in my mid thirties now. It was the last five years that I struggled to find work. I got a new job few weeks ago. Stop sending me nasty messages about me, my family situation and my work situation.

[chitown9]

 

For the individual who have sent me a nasty personal message about my life and this issue: I've worked since I was 16 and that almost full time while studying. I am in my mid thirties now. It was the last five years that I struggled to find work. I got a new job few weeks ago. Stop sending me nasty messages about me, my family situation and my work situation.

 

Go to your profile and look at your edit list. There is a provision there for an ignore list. Just put this person on that list.

 

I think that you have a good plan. Have a happy life!! ....chi

[Moontiger]

Contact a mod, forward them the message. There was a guy here who sent me a very nasty message once, I contacted a mod, he was banned.

[agent1607307371]

Yes, you can report abusive PM's just like abusive replies to threads and we will take it just as seriously.

[Not a rookie]

Agent, I've forwarded you the guy's name and his message.

[Blue Spiral]

You need to get out of this situation for your own good. I understand that you don't want to abandon your parents, but they've already abandoned you, for all intents and purposes. And you can't help people that don't want to be helped.