It's his birthday....sigh

[bluesyvox]

My ex and I split up almost 2 months ago now (previously posted my story - he met someone else, cheated on me, moved in with her). We have been NC since the breakup with the exception of a text discussing the things he stored with me (he was polite but aloof - like a stranger now). I have been doing much better than I was - I still have good days & bad days - but the good days now outnumber the bad days.

 

Now, I'm having a bit of a rough time. It is his birthday today. I was supposed to fly down & spend the weekend with him. Instead, the new girl gets to spend it with him. I was hoping I had healed enough that it would be just another day but nope...it really hit me.

 

Right now I feel a mixture of sadness, bitterness, and anger. Apparently I'm still having a hard time completely letting go. I miss my friend most off all & I hate the fact that now I don't even get to spend his bday with him.

 

Seems so stupid & trivial to let this get to me. Just needed to vent a little I guess.

[daddids]

Stupid and trivial ? Dont really think so. It is totally rational to feel this way but that's how life is, isnt it ?

There are bright days but there are dark, cold days as well. Can we change it? No. What we can do is deal with it, grow stronger and move on.

 

Just go out with your friends or do something so that you dont end up sitting at home thinking over and over about it.

[microha65]

He cheated on you, which can hurt alot, and the fact that he's spending time with someone else just puts salt on the wound. I would just try and find an outlet, something you like to do, just spend the day doing that, surround your self with people that love and care about you and keep your chin up, eventually you'll move on it just takes time. Don't sweat it to much.

[SapphireNoir10]

What your feeling is completely natural. You've suffered a huge betrayal and a relationship loss.

 

The only comfort is that someone that could cheat on you and then leave you, jumping straight into another relationship doesn't sound like someone whose emotionally healthy or knows how to treat someone.

 

Chances are he may do the same to her someday. Most people I know who cheat and leave have a cycle of the same behaviour.

 

She hasn't 'won' anything. I imagine she will feel quite insecure in their relationship knowing he cheated on his last partner with her, that isn't good grounds to start a relationship.

 

It takes time to get over it. Your mourning the him you loved and thought he was. It's natural.

 

Stay strong.

[melissap1991]

It's not stupid at all. You miss him & it kindof sucks that the new girl gets to be with him and not you, but think of it as he did cheat on you with her, so chances are he'll cheat on her too. I know it seems as though you really care about him, but in reality he screwed you over & I know it hurts like hell, but he kindof did you a favor. Now you're single and you can do what you want. Try to keep yourself busy by hanging out with friends, going to the gym, work or even school so that your mind isn't constantly focused on missing him. There are tons of other great guys out there who will treat you ten thousand times better then he ever could, so try to go out & meet new people.

 

Unfortunately I've been throught the exact situation & like you, I didn't know what to do. I was depressed & couldn't eat anything. Every time I talked to my ex it was like we were strangers. But over time you'll realize you're thinking of him less and you'll find someone who will treat you like you deserve. Just know that you're not alone & this happens to a lot of people every day. I hope you cheer up girly. You'll be okkayy soon, I promise.

 

 

-Melissa P