Do i have a Chemical Imbalance ?

[JoJoStar26]

I've been severely depressed since the break-up of my ex.

I have my ups and downs and then some days aren't so bad and then some are worst.

I tend to have suicidal thoughts from time to time.

Even though i have a lot on my plate i feel it only has to get better before it get worst.

It sucks with the stress and negative energy i have to deal with at work.

Then i have my own personal demons to deal with seem to take a toll on me.

[iamkaylee]

It's possible.

 

You've been through a lot in the past couple years. The car accident, that little girl, your mom, your girlfriend. Now your uncle just passed on. You're carrying around a lot of weight from all that. Your family and friends really aren't there either for you either. You have no support system.

 

Any one of those by itself can make someone badly depressed. Take the whole bunch just in a few years like you have and it's "wham, get back up, wham, stagger back up, wham, make a knee and grab the ropes get back up, wham back down you go again".

 

I know how you feel about medication and all because of your mom, and I really do understand why. But I wish you'd at least think about going to see a counselor and maybe consider medication for just a little while.

 

Depression does run in families and you may have a chemical imbalance that's contributing to you being stuck in this rut of anger and self depreciation. If so, it's a medical condition just like diabeties and hypertension. There's nothing wrong with needing medication for it if you need it, and it may very well be something you need for just a short time to help get your chemistry back the way it should be.

 

Please think about it.

[JoJoStar26]

Something need to happen because going on this long is never good.

When i did go to counseling which been some months since i last been there.

My therapist recommended i get on meds for a short period of time just to try it.

I simply told her " NO ". I don't want to be a drug addict.

[LikeWater]

Antidepressants aren't addictive, so no worries there. They're not even mentally addictive because they don't operate on your brain's reward system in any way. If you're thinking you might have a chemical imbalance, antidepressants will only restore those to their natural order and nothing more. You can't get buzzed off them or anything of that nature. So if you're avoiding antidepressants simply because you don't want to become addicted, I assure you, you won't.

[iamkaylee]

It won't make you a drug addict. I promise. I am an addict and when I needed them I took antidepressants. When I didn't need them any longer, I stopped taking them. Weaning off slowly is important so your chemistry adjusts slowly, just up and quitting isn't good for you and can make you nosedive again.

 

Go back to counseling. You need someone to talk to that can help you work through all the grief and anger you have.

 

Try the meds. Give them at least two weeks, a month is better. If you really hate them or they make you feel awful or weird, tell your counselor. Sometimes it takes a few tries to find just the right medicine and dose. Done right by giving feedback to your counselor if they're working for you or not, it can help immensely.

 

I wouldn't tell you to do it if I thought it was a bad idea for you. I think it could help you.

 

HUGS sweetheart.

[JoJoStar26]

Giving some thought on it. Because, i am tired of feeling so horrible inside.

I no longer have any pains or worries when i am asleep.

Something is keeping me alive because death isn't something i want.

I just want the pain to go away. That's it.

[JoJoStar26]

Antidepressants aren't addictive, so no worries there. They're not even mentally addictive because they don't operate on your brain's reward system in any way. If you're thinking you might have a chemical imbalance, antidepressants will only restore those to their natural order and nothing more. You can't get buzzed off them or anything of that nature. So if you're avoiding antidepressants simply because you don't want to become addicted, I assure you, you won't.

 

 

Thanks!

I guess it wouldn't hurt to try it and see what happens.

I really do believe i may have a chemical imbalance and that's something

my therapist was explaining to me.

She said she felt my pain, because as i would talk to her i would tear up.

[ButterflyWrists]

If you're worried about the types of AD's and the levels, the best thing to do is decide what side effects you really don't want such as sedating. Also the most frequent AD prescribed is prozac (at least it is in the UK) and it is not addictive and only attacks serotonin pathways, and is pretty mild. You can make sure the doctor gives you a very low dose of anti depressant.

As for the causes of you're depression (family/girlfriend) then therapy is what will help you get through those, it sounds like you're in therapy, so anti depressants should only be a short term thing..

[JoJoStar26]

If you're worried about the types of AD's and the levels, the best thing to do is decide what side effects you really don't want such as sedating. Also the most frequent AD prescribed is prozac (at least it is in the UK) and it is not addictive and only attacks serotonin pathways, and is pretty mild. You can make sure the doctor gives you a very low dose of anti depressant.

As for the causes of you're depression (family/girlfriend) then therapy is what will help you get through those, it sounds like you're in therapy, so anti depressants should only be a short term thing..

 

 

I'm not in therapy now. I believe it's been at least 5 months since the last time been.

Just got to my breaking point that this pain have to go away.

I can't take anymore pressure. This load has been on me for quite some time.

Just want to be at peace with my life.

[ButterflyWrists]

Ah ok, my mistake. Well medication works best in conjunction with therapy, but they do help without (obviously). the same as I said above still stands, as the type of anti depressants. You should decide on what side effects you do not want at all, as it should help in deciding what AD's would be good..

[Miss Firecracker]

JoJo,

 

I believe you do have a chemical imbalance. But I'm not a doctor. I hurt when I read your threads, so I know you must be in a bad place.

 

Just to tell you my story, I began taking Zoloft in fall of 2006. My sons have mental illnesses, and I have some serious anxiety and depression myself. All that together was finally the last straw, so I went to the doctor. I took Zoloft for 4 years, and it helped me tremendously. My husband will vouch for that, it made his life much more enjoyable. I quit taking the drug after I had gotten over the worst part of the family disaster. Then finally I was having so much deep depression I gave in and went back on meds early in 2012. This time I was in such distress that the doctor prescribed 100 mg. I had taken only 50 before. I hesitated and only took half that pill each day, then I realized it wasn't quite doing the trick this time. So I finally gave in and started taking the full pill. I am doing great now (at least great for me).

 

When I went off the drug after a period of 4 years, I weaned myself off. You are NOT supposed to do that, and I know I did something risky. But I got off fine with none of the side effects of withdrawal. I imagine if someone is one a very high strength it could be harder to come off. But my experience with Zoloft has been great.

 

Good luck!!

[JoJoStar26]

It's very hard for me to accept how damaged i am right now.

yeah, i come to the term that's what it is as much i don't like it.

[Miss Firecracker]

It's very hard for me to accept how damaged i am right now.

yeah, i come to the term that's what it is as much i don't like it.

 

Do you cry a lot?

[lavenderdove]

Anytime anyone has suicidal thoughts, it is time to see a counselor/doctor. And there is no reason to keep living in this pain and misery when there are ways to alleviate it.

 

You wouldn't be against going to a doctor to do what it takes to repair a broken leg or cure cancer, and depression is no different. The stress hormones generated from a breakup can indeed alter brain chemistry to the point that a clinical depression results, and the medication is just a way of turning that back around again and re-establishing the proper brain chemistry so the depression can lift.

 

Most people are NOT on anti-depressants forever, especially if they have a depression triggered by a high stress event. So you might need 6 months to a year or so treatment with talk therapy and medication, but usually people are again weaned off the anti-depressents when they have been out of the depression for a bit. And there are whole new generations of anti-depressents that are not the 'brain bombs' that the old ones used to be, with the more recent ones targeted to the particular types of depression people are experiencing, and if one isn't working or has side effects for a particular person, they can switch to another.

 

So you have nothing to lose by trying, and everything to gain.

[lavenderdove]

btw, prozac is even considered an 'old fashioned' medication at this point, like the older broad spectrum antibiotic since there have been many advances since it was introduced. they have gotten more and more specific in their treatments. for example, you will be questioned about whether you sleep too much, or not much at all, or whether you are crying, or whether you are angry, or anxious etc. The one they give you will be targeted to what is out of balance.

 

they will sometimes start you on something like prozac because it covers the gamut, or the doctor isn't as trained in the newer meds. I suggest if you have biochemical issues in the family or heredity, you go to a specialist such as a psychiatrist to get the evaluation as to what medication would work best based on your particular history or symptoms. Then a regular doctor and a psychologist/talk counselor could take over once you have figured out what med is the best for you.

[Seraphim]

It's very hard for me to accept how damaged i am right now.

yeah, i come to the term that's what it is as much i don't like it.

 

You are not "damaged". Just love and accept yourself for where you are now and commit yourself to doing better.

[JoJoStar26]

Do you cry a lot?

 

 

Not really....Last time i cried was in September of last year on the day my mom died 4 years ago.

But due to my issues the first time i broke down in cried was what what led me to do counseling.

I felt hopeless and wanted to die. So, i reach out for help because i was on the verge of killing myself.

[JoJoStar26]

Yeah, the break-up initiated the switch off in my head.

And i believed something was wrong with me and i still carry that guilt around.

Still haven't fully accepted my mom passing.

My ex told me " I WAS ALL ****ED UP ". So the things i experienced in my life

and those harsh words coming from someone i trusted and believe in more then my family.

I believed it!!!

[Miss Firecracker]

Not really....Last time i cried was in September of last year on the day my mom died 4 years ago.

But due to my issues the first time i broke down in cried was what what led me to do counseling.

I felt hopeless and wanted to die. So, i reach out for help because i was on the verge of killing myself.

 

I think it's better that I COULD cry when I was depressed. It helped, but I hated the feelings that MADE me cry.

[JoJoStar26]

Some days i can get so lazy after work. Where i don't want to be bothered or zoned out.

Come home some days and sleep. Most days, i am angry.

[JoJoStar26]

I think it's better that I COULD cry when I was depressed. It helped, but I hated the feelings that MADE me cry.

 

 

Take that back last time i cried was last month. When my uncle passed. That still hurt!

I really don't bother my grandmother with my problems.

She lost a son, a daughter and my cousin committed suicide two years ago.

[Seraphim]

Like lavender said there are very good medications out there that can help. Some people absolutely require them and when they require them there's nothing wrong with that. My husband is one of those people. My husband takes Zoloft ,he's taken other medications over the last 15 years. Zoloft seems to be the best one. He however takes it for anxiety not depression. It seems to do well in both cases though.

 

I took Zoloft for only 20 days it does not work well with my brain chemistry though. Apparently I'm allergic to that medication. My doctor did say though it does work well in at least 75% of cases.

[lavenderdove]

There can be all different kinds of depression triggered based on the particular chemical imbalance... angry depression, anxious depressions, the traditional sad depressions, or a mixture of these. So those are clues the doctor uses to decide which med to try first. everyone's brain chemistry is unique so they do have to try various ones sometimes to find the right one for the person.

[Miss Firecracker]

Did you say that TWO of your family members have committed suicide? If so, that is more reason to think you probably inherited this imbalance.

[Seraphim]

Did you say that TWO of your family members have committed suicide? If so, that is more reason to think you probably inherited this imbalance.

 

I agree. It is probably more an imbalance. However not being a dr I can't really say. But when you have multiple family members with mental health issues it is more likely an inherited imbalance.