Will this benefit me more? (speaking to ex's parents about my belongings)

[leftme]

We've been broke up 6 weeks. She was with another guy immediately. She is sure of what she wants and doesn't contact me as you'd expect.

 

I asked if I could get my stuff last week as it's being needlessly stretched out now but she made excuses as she was busy but said she would contact me this week to let me know when her step-dad would give me my stuff but she's hardly rushing to organise it or communicate the plans with me.

 

My options are...

 

1) Wait for her to text and communicate with her to arrange it.

2) Wait for her to text and phone her step-dad to arrange it.

3) Phone her step-dad directly and arrange it rather than wait for her text.

 

I want to show that I'm moving on and don't want to rekindle anything so believe 2 + 3 are the better options. Maybe it will seem petty though?

 

Thoughts?

[markie6]

I always try and not use option 3... unless it's an emergency, getting other family and friends involved rarely helps matters, but of course you know them best

[Fossil]

If you don't need your stuff asap I would wait longer and not make the first contact.

 

And +1 to what markie6 said. It should be only you two to handle all the aspects of your relationship/ex-relationship.

[leftme]

I always try and not use option 3... unless it's an emergency, getting other family and friends involved rarely helps matters, but of course you know them best

 

I was always quite close to the step-dad and he's really fond of me. I just feel she's messed me about enough and she's not allowing me to have the clean-break I deserve. I'll reserve option 3 if she hasn't contacted me by the end of the week.

 

I could even text her to ask... but knowing she's with another guy it hurts even just talking to her.

[MasterPo]

I think I would send a friend over to pick it all up or have her dump at it the front door. In regards to the other guy, I know how you feel and I would've probably just left all that crap behind.

 

Mine got all stuff together, tried to sneak in and dump in my truck bed. Expensive stuff. I had moved my truck earlier that morning so she was forced to find me and then ask for my vehicle location and state her purpose. I think it hurt more to see her act that way, cold and distant, than the actual breakup. Nothing like seeing stuff you got together carelessly and thoughtlessly thrown together. I stood there a long time before I could even get in the truck and drive away. Yeah, raw wounds, try not to rip off any emo scabs if you can.

[markie6]

I was always quite close to the step-dad and he's really fond of me. I just feel she's messed me about enough and she's not allowing me to have the clean-break I deserve. I'll reserve option 3 if she hasn't contacted me by the end of the week.

 

I could even text her to ask... but knowing she's with another guy it hurts even just talking to her.

 

totaly understand , the problem for the 3rd party , no matter how much they like / love us .... they would often rather not get involved... because it can cause them bother.

[DN]

If you get on well with her step-dad, I would use option 3 now, and get this done and dusted.

[iamkaylee]

If you get on well with her step-dad, I would use option 3 now, and get this done and dusted.

 

I would too. 6 weeks is more than enough time to get this done. It would have been done by now if it was a priority for her. She's already said she'll let you know when the stepdad will give you your stuff, so she's already involved him. Keep waiting on her timetable and you might end up waiting a long time.

[leftme]

Used option 3. Will be getting my stuff on Friday night.

 

Apparently my ex wanted to text but didn't know if i wanted her to bring my stuff...

 

She feels awkward about meeting me...

 

Well no ****!