Should I really consider getting back with her?

[a_ron3110]

I had posted a message before, Heartbreak and how to get her back, and I have new info to share. I recently found out that my ex is prone to making rash decisions, she will not think them out very much and make a snap judgement. She then later usually regrets that decision. I also learned that she is now "kinda seeing" somebody else right now. It hasn't even been a week since we broke up! She had told me in a past conversation that she wouldn't date anybody else during or down time, but she was going to act like her, meaning having a good time, some flirting, and if she sees somebody it would happen. I understand that, and it's all good and everything but not even a week she is seeing somebody else! She swore before that she wasn't leaving me for anybody, with massive amounts of tears in her eyes. When she decided she needed a break and needed space she cried like I had never seen her cry before. I really have a tough time deciding if she is or ever has been genuine with me. I would take her back in a heartbeat if she wanted to, but right now I am in the state of mind of just calling it quits completely. This guy that she is seeing right now is a friend of a mutual friend of ours, more so her friend than mine, but she never mentioned him to me. When she said she was hanging out with the mutual friends, she never mentioned this guy to me. But now all of a sudden from one of her good friends, I had heard this info ( the snap decisions, the other guy, and how she tends to bounce from guy to guy). The only problem is that this friend is mad at my ex for kind of abandoning her and she has tendancies to exagerate. I don't know who to believe or what to do! I want to just sit and talk with her, but she doesn't want to right now, and is growing increasingly aggetated with me. So I was planning on calling her next week and sitting down and discussing things. I really am planning on just breaking things off completely with her, but this may bring her back to me too, knowing that I don't want her anymore. See part of her problem is she wants what she can't have, according to the info friend. I still really want her back, and if she decided she wanted me again I would do it in a heartbeat. I guess I'm just looking for some advice on the situation.

[pineapplegirl]

Sometimes actions speak louder than words... You may be jumping to conclusions that your X and the new guy have been planning to hook up, but you also might be right. If you really love her then you'll want her to be happy right? Even if that means that she isn't with you...

[jnelson]

"If you really love her then you'll want her to be happy right?"...cmon..that's really great for you to say and im sure lots of ppl will say that, but who really means that? who really wants the ex they love to be happy with someone else? if you really love them you want them to be with you...when you hear ppl say that, I think they mean that they love them, but not in the sense that they would still love to be in a relationship with them....

[pineapplegirl]

jnelson: please refer to my most recent post in the forum

Most women choose the guy that's going to be bad for her/won't treat her well/is an idiot etc. over the guy who will be GOOD to her. And, if a_ron would recognize that, then mabe he'll find someone that is worthy of his love.

[chai714]

I want to just sit and talk with her, but she doesn't want to right now, and is growing increasingly aggetated with me. So I was planning on calling her next week and sitting down and discussing things.

 

DO NOT have that talk. If you're looking for some closure, it comes from within. Let her rush into a new relationship . . .most rebounds do not last, but don't try to bank on what I just said.

 

That talk that you want to have will not be good for you. The past is the past . . . some things, chicks will never explain to you, but you've got to live with those unanswered questions. It's part of life.

 

You want her back in your life? Walk away for now. Don't make contact for a few months, when you'll have a more clear view of the situation and won't do or say anything regrettable.

[Smusher]

True Dat true dat . all of the above. my ex was thouroughly mean, she didnt wish me well and i wouldnt to her either, i would tell everyone else that i hope she is happy, but i hope shes not and is thinking of me. then again if she is happy she may also be thinking of me. I actually miss her just as much when i have had a happy time/event, where i think "damn, i wishshe was here for that, she would have been happy about it" etc....