Does he want me back?

[cherryx]

Me and my bf split 2 weeks ago. Since then we've talked a little and i've seen him twice as he's picked our daughter up on weekends. Things had been rocky for a while and we had a big argument and we both ended things. He moved back to his mums about 2 hours away and i've stayed here with my daughter. He never texts me and i always make the first move, he comes over real cold and hard to get anything out of. He's been constantly hanging out with his old mates (and exes, which drives me crazy). I've had a bit of a crappy childhood and because of this i am extremely insicure and lost my temper very quickly, i am recieving counsilling for this. He told me on Sunday after dropping baby off that he would get back into a relationship with me as long as i'd change and work on things, yet he thinks he has nothing to change and he blames me for our failed relationship. He was never affectionate or showed me any love and i needed this to change but he refuses. Now all week he's back to ignoring me again and am completley confused as to what he wants from me x

[Mustachio]

So he wants you to change, but will accept no fault of his own for your relationship ending? Thats crap. Only in rare circumstances is all the blame to be laid on one person. I think you need to take a step back and look at the situation for what it is, that sounds like its borderline emotionally abusive...

[Chinafish]

I reccomend seeing a relate counsellor, they see individuals as well as couples. He seems to be acting in a very immature manner at the moment. I suggest not contacting hI'm for a while, is there somewhere you could go for a few weeks, just to give him some perspective. He seems to know your sitting back accepting this childish behaviour. I think you need to assert yourself a bit to make him sit up and take notice.

[charity]

agree with chinafish. you need to assert yourself. you are doing everything, he is doing nothing. i doubt he WANTS to get back with you but he probably will if he has nothing better on offer. is that what you want? you need to really THINK about what you want and what your baby needs.

never get into a relationship with someone who puts all the blame on you and doesn't reflect on themselves. and ...even if they do accept some responsibility, you guys still need to agree on what exactly will change and how you will make the relationship work this time around.

if i was you i would tell him i have no interest in reconciliation at this time as you you both need time to figure out what really went wrong. back off on calling and texting him... in fact stop altogether unless he initiates and even then keep it short. he needs to figure out what he really wants and this is the way that will happen.