Feeling disconnected with the world and everything in it

[Jaydedgirl]

So actually from last year I have been feeling down and out..like nothing will make me feel truly happy. I have tried buying material stuff that i liked but once i have it..i feel that sadness again. I have been gaining weight most of this year although i do exercise but do not eat right. I am on my computer and phone most of the time and as result my eyesight has gone worse..like my vision will be kind of misty and weird. I tried to relax my eyes for a few days but no improvement so i got hooked up with my phone and computer again. I feel like a zombie and ill be 25 soon. I dont have any friends, in fact nobody wants to hang out with me..not even my cousins. I have a bf but he lives in another city..i see him like once every 3 months...i do feel happy with him but not completely happy. My family never understands anything i have to say..they are too quick to judge, laugh or ignore me. My mother rather listen to my sisters complaints than my own. I also feel very ill, i dont feel like doing anything...nothing excites me anymore. I feel like im just existing...and its like im not really living... what can i do to be alive again??

[ApocalypseDreams]

Jaydedgirl, I know EXACTLY how you feel as I'm going through this at the moment. I feel so unmotivated by anything at the moment and like you said, just existing for the hell of it. Everyday I do the same thing and it's driving me nuts. I don't really have any friends either and the friends I do have are either in serious relationships or spend the weekends playing video games. So socially, it sometimes feels pointless regarding these people as friends. I feel really apathetic and lethargic towards life, like I have no energy.

 

Sounds like you're in a rut. May I ask what you are doing with yourself right now? Are you working full time/studying/something else? Is there anything you are passionate about or something you'd like to be doing or rather be doing? Maybe there is something you can do to break the monotony of life? Go to college and study? Take up something you've always wanted to do but for whatever reason you've prevented yourself from doing it? There must be something. Something to challenge yourself. I think people feel like they're just existing when they're not challenging or trying new things. I'm considering working towards doing some more travel. Is this possibly an option that you could take or something you would be interested in?

 

I wish I had better advice sorry. Hope it gets better for you.

[livelarge]

Since you are unmotivated, I won't suggest finding a hobby. But I will suggest taking a local class in anything, anything at all. Or find a volunteer gig somewhere. Schools are often dying to have adults read to kids. Get out of the house and do something. Don't go out looking for happiness. Right now just look for something to do to take your mind off being unhappy. That's the first step. Once you start doing things outside of your comfort zone, you can start looking for things that you enjoy.

 

I've taken classes at local community colleges and local recreation centers and I've volunteered at schools. There are things to do out there that are not huge commitments that will get you thinking in new and different ways.

[Jaydedgirl]

Hey there..thanks! Well i am working an 8-4 job as a receptionist..at the moment im not studying. I love makeup though and i think ill take up a course on makeup artistry. But otherwise when i go home from work..i feel like weird..alone..ill...and just want to sleep. Its not that im lazy its just that i have been judged so ,Much in my life for my past experiences and im not letting go of people's negativity...which i just want to be free from. At home i use my own money to buy food,clothing,pay for studies if i have to..etc. Right now i cannot afford a car at all...and maybe not until i find another job. I am self conscious about my teeth as they are big and stick out when i laugh or talk. I dont have money for braces,etc. So i have to live with this......and this sadness..

[Jaydedgirl]

Since you are unmotivated, I won't suggest finding a hobby. But I will suggest taking a local class in anything, anything at all. Or find a volunteer gig somewhere. Schools are often dying to have adults read to kids. Get out of the house and do something. Don't go out looking for happiness. Right now just look for something to do to take your mind off being unhappy. That's the first step. Once you start doing things outside of your comfort zone, you can start looking for things that you enjoy.

 

I've taken classes at local community colleges and local recreation centers and I've volunteered at schools. There are things to do out there that are not huge commitments that will get you thinking in new and different ways.

 

Where im from volunteer work sucks..theres never anything for you to do except give them money...so thats out of the question. Trust me i have tried orphanage homes, shelter for animals, street kids shelter, old age homes but not one is interested in taking me on to help, i feel they are racist in this country,im from south africa thought. Its sucks here..no oppurtunities at all and that makes me sad..

[ApocalypseDreams]

Me too. People think I'm lazy, it isn't that. I just don't know what I'm supposed to be doing and don't have the energy, motivation or confidence to put anything into action if I did. It's a pretty horrible situation to be in and people who are naturally confident, motivated and energetic don't understand.

 

Volunteer work is often suggested here and don't get me wrong it's a great piece of advice but it's not appropriate for everyone. The city I live in basically has little to no opportunities to volunteer, even more so in something that may interest me or help me career wise. Like you said, alot of them are more after the donation of money rather than your time.

 

Do you still live in South Africa? I was born in Durban but left when I was 5 and therefore cannot really remember much. It's been a dream of mine to go back and visit for pretty much my entire life.

[superfox]

Not everyone bounds out of bed in the morning getting all excited about work but we just have to get on with it. I've been in situations where I've not been working, I've volunteered at a children's charity doing reception work - to get me out my rut without thinking of how good it would look on my cv. I've retrained for a new qualifiation. I've made and sold things for myself and charities. It's all very well day dreaming but no one is going to magically get you out of your ruts but yourself.

 

I'm cleaning now, on minimum wage so I can feed my children, do you think this is what I wanted out of life? Nope. But I'm doing it while keeping an eye on the bigger picture which I will MAKE happen.

 

As Oscar Wilde once said, 'all of us are in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars'

[Jaydedgirl]

I am working and will takeup a course on makeup. I know its a tough world out there but I dont have the energy or motivation to get me going,nothing to be excited about. I find myself going around and round in circles. I get sick for no reason and soon as i do something which takes up some energy i feel weak and my eyes get all misty. Like my energy is being drained...

 

Ofcourse i want a better future and i have big dreams but i cant even take the first step to making them come true...

[Jaydedgirl]

Yep i live in south africa..its a beautiful place with not many oppurtunities unless you have the money to talk... i dont feel like myself anymore..

[Kerrian]

I know how you feel with this - sometimes I feel the same way, like nothing is worth doing and I might as well just curl up and go to bed when I get in. It's a feeling I get sporadically and I hate it.

Right now, I'm sitting here feeling completely drained.

I'm a really creative person, so there are projects all around me, chores to do, the weather is beautiful...and I just can't get up the energy or inspiration to do any of them or even just to go out for a walk, or to sit in the garden.

 

Usually, I talk to someone about how I feel - I vent it out, and then I look around the internet for the things I know I'm interested in. For me, I go and look through galleries of other artists, or read other people's writing that is way beyond my capabilities. Sometimes it just gives me the boost that I need by looking at what I could be capable of if I mustered up some inspiration to get up and paint or draw or something.

And if it doesn't, then at the very least it makes me think about my hobbies and sparks something a little more than that feeling of going around in circles.

 

Perhaps give it a try?

 

That, and another part of it is that I always feel like there's something I be doing that I'm not doing.

This might sound crazy, but sometimes just laying on my bed staring at the ceiling helps - reserve some time to yourself where you don't have to do a thing. It helps me counter that uselessness that I feel when I'm not doing anything, and then I can just get to doing what I should.

 

On top of that - setting yourself tasks. As simple as they are. Some days when I feel like this, even just going out shopping, posting a letter, filling in forms, sorting out my cupboards...makes me feel like I've accomplished something for the day, and it's just a little bit towards not feeling stranded.