We sleep together and like each other - but nothing has been said?? very unclear

[katrinahopkins]

also this got forgotten from the beginning of the thread but i dont think we are ready for a proper relationship and all that entails - either of us. i just think i want him not to sleep with other women. i would rather that he sleeps with only me and we keep things casual than that he sleeps with only me and we get serious

 

that makes it more complicated

sorry to be so washy but had to re - mention that part.

[Yaz]

Tell him that, then. You don't want to worry about where his ding-dong has been, you might get crabs > yuck!

[Crazyaboutdogs]

The problem is that he could very well tell you he will only sleep with you, and then meet someone, get caught up in the moment and sleep with that person..and never tell you. Since he is not actually in a relationship with you and it is just casual, he may not feel any obligation to telling you if he has slept with someone else. There is always a risk with FWBs especially when there is a demand for monogamy. FWBs are just all about sex and no real bond...the person who is not emotionally invested is usually not as considerate of the other person's feelings. It sounds to me like you are emotionally invested and therefore it is probably not a good idea to continue this FWB.

[catfeeder]

The problem is that he could very well tell you he will only sleep with you, and then meet someone, get caught up in the moment and sleep with that person..and never tell you. Since he is not actually in a relationship with you and it is just casual, he may not feel any obligation to telling you if he has slept with someone else. There is always a risk with FWBs especially when there is a demand for monogamy. FWBs are just all about sex and no real bond...the person who is not emotionally invested is usually not as considerate of the other person's feelings. It sounds to me like you are emotionally invested and therefore it is probably not a good idea to continue this FWB.

 

I agree. You could start a conversation by saying you read an article today about STDs and it made you nervous. Tell him you haven't been having sex with anyone else, and ask him if he has or if he plans to. Then you can take the conversation wherever you want.

 

It's simple to get naked with someone by taking your clothes off--anybody can do that. It takes courage and self respect to hold out for someone you can get emotionally naked with.

 

Head high.

[thali8]

well ok guys i asked him (by message) are you sleeping with other people? and he responded: what is the answer. ?????????????????? so i responded. come one. it is a serious question. that was just a minute ago, so waiting for his second (hopefully more clear???) answer.

 

seems he very much wants to evade my question. where do i go from here it hurts but want to do the right thing