hers Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 I think a lot of the time, destination weddings are planned knowing not everyone can make it but it's a courtesy to let people know they are welcome to come if they can. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 I think a lot of the time, destination weddings are planned knowing not everyone can make it but it's a courtesy to let people know they are welcome to come if they can. My thoughts too. I had a HS girl invite me a few years back to her South African wedding. Most def was not going to be able to make that trip on a gas cashier's salary! We are doing a (local) honeymoon as well. The beach is only a 5 hour drive from were we are getting married and we got some awesome rates for our beach side hotel because Oct is considered off season for the beach. A lot of stuff in the area is closed though because it's October but there are a few areas that will still be open when we go down. Link to comment
hers Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 If I could do it all over again, I'd do a destination wedding like that. Whoever can make it is welcome but if not, no big deal. I regret our big wedding. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 If I could do it all over again, I'd do a destination wedding like that. Whoever can make it is welcome but if not, no big deal. I regret our big wedding. I have a feeling some won't be happy with ours - no alcohol, no entertainment really - but all I really care about is the ceremony. Link to comment
hers Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 That's how it was for me andthats why I regret it. I loved our ceremony so much and will always remember that happily but the reception is what I hate remembering. People looked so bored in our pics. A destination wedding would've been great Link to comment
Firiel Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Sherry, do you know what it is about a big wedding that he likes? I know that my wedding wasn't "big" in the typical sense of the word (we stuck to a $4,000 budget), but we still had good food and had a fun time with people at our reception. He may not really be aware of the options for weddings... it seems like a lot of times they are presented as being either courthouse weddings or huge $15,000 ordeals, so if he hasn't done much research, he may be assuming those are the only two options. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 ^ I agree. Our bedding isn't BIG - including us, the officiant, and 2 photographers it's like 55 people at max - but it's not small either. A big wedding to me is a guest list of over 100 people and a budget of around $10,000. You can have a big wedding but do it on a smaller budget - Hers did. Link to comment
hers Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 130 on our guest list. Final bill was about $4000. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Ous will be about $3,000-$4,000. I have the numbers written down but just haven't added them up yet. Link to comment
sherryberrypie Posted September 12, 2011 Author Share Posted September 12, 2011 So we forced ourselves to talk it out today when we went to the river. That sucked. We both confessed that we're each incredibly hurt, for different reasons, and it took a lot of hashing out. I just couldn't believe that probably the worst fight of our lives was over a wedding. Seriously. We had fun later on, and I made a resolution to myself to just live in the here and now and just not worry about it. He told me that I need to stop reading between the lines and just take what he says at face value. So there is no date, or season-- though winter is a contender, but he told me that he does NOT want to stay here for a honeymoon. He wants to go on a cruise and it means a lot to him. He definitely did not want to go camping Groomzilla. I still feel gypped that I waited 5 yrs to even get engaged and now it's another 2 years to a wedding, but it's not just about me, and I had said I was okay with a longer engagement. I'll just have to be. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 I'm glad you guys worked things out Sherry. It has to suck, I know. I guess I still don't see why it would be so bad to set a date - not even a date but a month and season so you can do some research to get the best deals. I have had a Groomzilla once or twice in this process myself though. And it's always over the craziest of things! Link to comment
hers Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 Ask yourself why you want a wedding/marriage so much. As someone who lived with her husband before marriage, I can say the day to day isn't all that different so our being married wasn't a huge deal, in retrospect. Link to comment
sherryberrypie Posted September 12, 2011 Author Share Posted September 12, 2011 We're leaning heavily towards winter. There is a ski resort a couple of hours from here and we'd have guaranteed snow. He's always wanted me to be his snow princess, and I can completely picture that. Because I'm ready to take his name and for us to merge everything. Right now, it's his name on the mortgage and on the bills. I want to be Mrs. C and to be a legal family. Also, we want to start a family and neither of us want to do that out of wedlock... old fashioned as it may sound. Yeah it does suck but hey, at least we're engaged, and when we do set a date, it'll be really exciting all over again. It'll also be exciting when I get my ring back. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 I think a winter wedding can be very beautiful - you just have to stay warm, lol! I love the colors you could use though - reds, light blues, greens... if I wasn't so springy, I would so have a Christmas wedding. Not on Christmas but a December wedding. But I hate the cold so that's a no no. Link to comment
hers Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 Ok how does he feel about your wants for a wedding sooner rather than later? Link to comment
sherryberrypie Posted September 12, 2011 Author Share Posted September 12, 2011 I like the cold. I get so hot and sweaty in the summer. Not pretty He doesn't agree (obviously) He doesn't believe we can do it on the cheap, doesn't WANT to do it on the cheap-- he said $5000. Seems like too much to me for anything but a car. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 $5,000 is actually pretty cheap in today's standards. Mine and Her's are about the $4,000 range I believe and Hers planned her's in under a year and I technically did as well with somethings. And I think both of us did very well being frugal. It all depends on your budget and what not and what you refuse to sacrifice for. Link to comment
sherryberrypie Posted September 12, 2011 Author Share Posted September 12, 2011 Yeah. I don't want to wish years away, but it would be nice to be a little closer... Nov/Dec 2013 is a long ways away. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 I know it seems like it is. *hugs* But if you think about it, it's really not. You'll graduate in what, June of 2012? After graduation that's technically only a year and a half away - plenty of time to fix final details. Link to comment
redrose85 Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 That really helps OG-- thank you. I feel tons better today, and even excited about the amazing wedding/honeymoon we ARE going to be able to have. This is my last entry in this journal--I'm going to start a new one now that I have my old username back!! Link to comment
hers Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 did you get your old account back?? Link to comment
redrose85 Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 Yeah! I requested a password and it sent me the password for my old account. I'm happy to have it back Link to comment
hers Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 haha i was like "i remember that eye!" Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 Lol, I was like what??? Who is this? Link to comment
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