Random Babblings of Nothing

[candykisses]

fcuking bosht.

[candykisses]

yea, you might wanna keep my leash a little tighter V and blow things way out of proportion, lol, what a psycho

 

Hanging out with Luke tomorrow =)

[candykisses]

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

“WHY YOU TRIPPING?!!?”

 

why am I trippin? cuz you`re a fukin PSYCHO lol

 

whatever, so over it.

[candykisses]

Fukin hell.

[candykisses]

Now listen to me, baby....

Say hello to the girl that I am. You’re gonna have to see through my perspective. cuz I believe in taking chances... what’s a girl to do? I just gotta do it my way. I’m so fed up w/people telling me to be someone else other than me, cuz....

 

Dancing is my hot hot sex....

I’m a slave for THE BEAT....

all I know is I’m so happy when I’m dancing....

 

Imma take the loss cuz I wanna attend fashion school, so respect that or pay up for the time used.

[candykisses]

cash rules everything around me.

[candykisses]

“Exotic dancers for V.I.P. dancing, stags, bachelor parties & travel

 

If you are an exotic dancer with experience that is bonus, but there is no experience needed, you will be working as a VIP dancer providing private lap dances for an upscale clientele. We are seeking hard working, motivated, honest and genuine women that are serious and business minded. If you are ready to make a thousand dollars a day and are available to travel, then we want to hear from you. Please email us your name, number, photos, availability and when you can start. Thank you and good luck.”

 

 

Applied.

[candykisses]

Awww he brought me flowers yesterday. Then he took me to the revolving restaurant. It was so sweet. We got back together...seeing the effort that he put forth

 

Now he knows I can do with or without him and if he doesn`t stop pissing me off and stfu about moving in and respect my wishes to take things slow imma go dance on a pole anytime. He`s gotta know that this moving in together has to be a decision I make because I WANT to, not NEED to because I`m broke...because that would not be based on mutual respect and nor will it be further down the road. It`s the idea behind it I was uncomfortable with and no amount of him constantly talking about moving in together could`ve changed that.

 

Going to a receptionist interview today! If I get the job, I`ll consider moving in sometime in the near future.

[candykisses]

Tonight everything going to voicemail cuz I`ll be dancing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[candykisses]

So frustrated. Just got off the phone and he was going off about how I seem distant these past few days. And then he called me selfish and self-centered because of what happened on the weekend. I feel like I have to constantly reassure him in this relationship. I don't know what to do I'm just like in a pickle right now.

 

I don't understand. Ok so I called his friend "babe" by accident because I was a little tipsy and they kinda look the same from behind. Normal people just laugh it off. But he was being so scary and pissed off about it. He says it's because he doesn't want to be disrespected. And then he kept telling me to "come sit on [his] lap" so people know we're together but I wanted to be with my friends. We got into a fight & I cabbed home crying.

 

It seems that all we do is fight and makeup, fight, makeup, fight, makeup, repeat.

 

UGH.

[candykisses]

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

[candykisses]

omg kill me right now.

[candykisses]

Why is everything so confusing?

[candykisses]

Can't you see I'm a fool, in so many ways?

[candykisses]

I'm crying and I don't even know what I'm crying ABOUT, lol

[candykisses]

I don't just wake up one day and go I want all this to happen.

[candykisses]

SO WINDY AND SCARY OUT RIGHT NOW

[candykisses]

Did you know that an emotional affair can be just as dangerous to a relationship as a physical affair, and sometimes more so? And that spouses who never had any intention of cheating can unwittingly become enmeshed in an emotional affair?

 

 

The couple may be going through a period of hostility, emotional distance, and conflict.

 

Under the surface there's a strong sexual chemistry that's covered up by the "friendship." And, of course, there's the excitement that's heightened by the secrecy that surrounds the new-found intimacy. Even though the "friendship" may begin innocently enough, as it progresses the bond between the two individuals deepens and drains energy away from the relationship.

 

The two individuals involved in the emotional affair may have been casual friends or co-workers to start with. Or they may have met online in a chat room. At some point, they started confiding feelings and personal details about themselves, their partners, and their relationships that their spouses would have seen as a violation of trust. And that was the first danger signal that indicated trouble ahead.

 

The second danger indicator was when they started sharing more with the "friend" than with their spouse and depending on the "friend" for their primary emotional support. At some point, they began to feel that the "friend" understood them better than their own spouse did and was easier to communicate with. They felt a sense of companionship with the "friend" that was lacking with their spouse.

 

The third red flag indicating danger ahead was when they began keeping their conversations and the frequency of contact secret from their spouses. This is a definite danger sign. Both individuals knew that their spouses would be upset if they knew the extent of the contact, the depth of the emotional connection, and the intimate subjects being routinely discussed.

 

The partner involved in the emotional affair usually attempts to downplay and minimize what has happened. She (or he) may rationalize that nothing physical has happened, so there's nothing for the spouse to be upset about. She may accuse the spouse of being jealous and controlling to get him to back off.

[candykisses]

Did you know that an emotional affair can be just as dangerous to a relationship as a physical affair, and sometimes more so? And that spouses who never had any intention of cheating can unwittingly become enmeshed in an emotional affair?

 

No I didn't know that, as a matter of fact. -_-

[candykisses]

He's teaching me to drive stick today!

[candykisses]

You tell me you're in love with me

Like you can't take your pretty eyes away from me

It's not that I don't want to stay

But every time you come too close I move away

 

I wanna believe in everything that you say

'Cause it sounds so good

But if you really want me, move slow

There's things about me you just have to know

 

Sometimes I run

Sometimes I hide

Sometimes I'm scared of you

But all I really want is to hold you tight

Treat you right

Be with you day and night

Baby all I need is time

 

I don't wanna be so shy

Every time that I'm alone I wonder why

Hope that you will wait for me

You'll see that you're the only one for me

 

I wanna believe in everything that you say

'Cause it sounds so good

But if you really want me, move slow

There's things about me you just have to know

 

Sometimes I run

Sometimes I hide

Sometimes I'm scared of you

But all I really want is to hold you tight

Treat you right

Be with you day and night

Baby all I need is time

 

 

Just hang around and you'll see

There's nowhere I'd rather be

If you love me, trust in me

The way that I trust in you

[candykisses]

So he continues to be a yelling psycho who hinders my personal growth & personal development.

 

do I want

 

the lifestyle

 

or

 

the experience?

 

 

All I know is, I definitely do want to get out of this city one day.

[candykisses]

I don't understand. All I do is see the best in people and this is what I get.

[candykisses]

It was so uncalled for.

[candykisses]

Yea I REALLLLLLY don't know why I relate to her so well lol.