Dirty Talk..... Surprised

[moondoggy]

My girlfriend recently started talking dirty to me in bed and this seemed out of character.

 

She knew exactly what to say and she got super turned on when i did it back to her but she claims that she has never ever done it before.

 

For some reason i cant shake the idea that she's telling me a white lie in saying that im her first for this. (as in first person to talk dirty too in bed)

 

I cant get it out of my head that this must have happened before if it turns her on so much and she's so good at it, so why is she telling me im her first. I asked her if she would be ashamed to tell me if she had done it before and if she had i wouldnt mind but she persists in saying im the first..

 

I want to believe her but i cant and its kind of bugging me.

[Tarkan]

Don't start digging for answers that she isn't giving. Your mind will start to distort reality and make up things. If she says so, believe her until you stumble on the proof that she lied. And even if she did have sex with another, would it be that much of a problem ? Alot of people lie about the number of partners they had before.

 

Enjoy the moment for what it is. C'mon, she's talking dirty to you ! I wasn't able to do that since years .. lucky you. You like it like that huh ? Don't you ? Don't you ? Yeeeeeeh you do ! Want more of it huh ? Like this ? oooow yeeeh !

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Just because someone is good at something doesn't mean they have had first hand practice. Talking dirty is not brain surgery, anyone can do it...I am sure that sexually active 13 year olds talk dirty. You can read a book and learn how to do it. At any rate, even if she has done it before, would it make you feel any better if she told you that she had once talked dirty with someone else. She chose to share this with you..focus on the intimacy you have with her rather than on what she may or may not have done with someone else.

[moondoggy]

thanks for the quick answers guys...

 

I know I'm being irrational and i have a history of obsessing over girlfriends past sexual encounters. I'm getting better at blocking it out and focusing on the here and now i just needed someone to remind me of this.

 

I occasionally go back to my old ways and ask questions like did she do this or that with her previous partners and picture it and then obsess about that image etc. I guess this was just a quick departure back to that way of thinking.

 

It helps for me anyway to have people reminding me to focus on the fact that im the here and the now and that digging up teh past isnt going to have any positive outcome whatsoever..

 

sorry rambling on now, but thanks for the confirmation of what i know and need to hear

[Tarkan]

You are welcome

 

I occasionally go back to my old ways and ask questions like did she do this or that with her previous partners and picture it and then obsess about that image etc. I guess this was just a quick departure back to that way of thinking.

 

When I date a girl and she starts talking about an ex I immediately stop her unless it's something relevant. I can be like you sometimes ( since I have a quiet visual mind lol ) so I rather protect myself from those thoughs by avoiding everything that might make me think about them.

 

The past is the past, no need to hurt yourself for that

[KG]

I told my G/F that the past is the past....I have no need to hear about hers, or tell her about mine.

 

Focus on her.....

[Joshb]

yeah its come down to the point i have never really asked my gf her sexual past, nor really spoke on mine. Its better this way and i dont want to know.

 

As for your question, she probably telling you the truth. Maybe she always wanted to do that, but felt uncomfortable, and now she tried it and liked it...therefore showing shes comfortable enough to do so around you. If you both like it thats all there is to it.

 

Dont let your thoughts get the best of you or make an issue out of nothing, nothing she did screams she did it before you, nor does it matter anyway.

[OptomisticGirl]

She's probably telling the truth. She may have been extrememly shy about doing it before now and took that moment to try it out and see if you liked it.. or she was just that turned on that it was the way she felt, she vocalizied it, and in turn it turned both of you on.

 

Just because you have never done something before doesn't mean it can't turn you on. I know first hand.

 

As for the whole imagining her with a past guy... yeah, that is the quickest way to screw up a relationship. There are just some questions you should not ask because honestly, the truth is not always good.

[midnightrambler]

2 things....

1---i remember that i was with a "virgin" and she told me not to "come inside of her" I found that odd and made me skeptical about her claim....I was proven right because later she told me she lied about being a virgin because she thought that would make her more attracted to me.

 

2---I do believe one needs little experience to talk dirty, and once they like it Katy bar the Door

[moondoggy]

2 things....

1---i remember that i was with a "virgin" and she told me not to "come inside of her" I found that odd and made me skeptical about her claim....I was proven right because later she told me she lied about being a virgin because she thought that would make her more attracted to me.

 

2---I do believe one needs little experience to talk dirty, and once they like it Katy bar the Door

 

Just to clarify...I don't suspect that she's a virgin, I know she's not.

 

Was just saying that I suspected she had talked dirty before despite telling me that i was the first person she had talked dirty too.

[midnightrambler]

Just to clarify...I don't suspect that she's a virgin, I know she's not.

 

Was just saying that I suspected she had talked dirty before despite telling me that i was the first person she had talked dirty too.

 

just a comment that chicks lie sometimes

[Cognitive_Canine]

You have to trust your girlfriend.

 

Talking dirty isn't that hard at all.

[Cognitive_Canine]

just a comment that chicks lie sometimes

 

Everybody lies sometimes. How does this help the OP?

[midnightrambler]

Everybody lies sometimes. How does this help the OP?

 

have to ask him

[Taikero]

There are a lot of things I've attempted the first time and been really good at because I have a natural knack for it.

 

Your girlfriend just happens to know how to talk randy. Enjoy it along with her confidence and lust for you.

[Day_Walker]

Fundamentally I dont think that it matters if she has said this before, some people just take to things like a fish to water. Enjoy the dirty talking and have fun with it.

[Honey Pumpkin]

Oh for heaven's sake, it's not hard to talk dirty - the most virginal virgin can talk dirty, it's the easiest thing in the world to pick up from magazines, films, internet etc. Faking sexual experience physically is probably harder, but talking dirty is pretty easy

 

Don't be surprised or start doubting her - unless you would prefer her repressed???? Enjoy!

[Brownstone322]

I know I'm being irrational and i have a history of obsessing over girlfriends past sexual encounters ...

Which is exactly what I was gonna say: Does it even matter what she may have done before? Why would it?

 

That said, she may be "lying" about having dirty-talked before simply because she's mildly embarrassed by it. I've known women who, out of bed, could not talk about sex at all -- as if it was some sort of unspeakable taboo -- but they loved to have sex itself. Go figure.

[doesitmatter30]

So what if she talked dirty to every boyfriend she ever had? Wouldn't matter to me as long as she would do it to me. If you're thinking about this stuff during sex, you need to loosen up. just go with it, maybe she thinks you'll be more turned on if you're the only guy she's talked dirty to...

[mandyc]

hmmm, maybe I should ask her for some tips?

 

how long have you been dating and how long before she started talking dirty? I would like to be a little crazier with my boyfriend but it feels like we've been dating so long now that if I busted that out he would be like what the heck? Where did that come from?

 

Lol but as you said you know you need to not focus/ care about her past. Have fun and try to not let your imagination run away....

[greywolf]

These are the types of questions that you aren't supposed to ask your partner, especially since it seems like there was no right answer for you. If she had admitted to doing it with someone else, you probably would have been hurt. But she said no, and now you're wondering if she lied to you.

 

It's not hard for a lot of people to talk dirty, especially if they're not shy about those things.