Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 Ok, I know some of you are tired of reading these but I am litteraly at my witts end. My girlfriends ex boyfriend who she dated for 2 years is back in the picture. He is trying to be all buddy buddy with her. They have been exchanging pics and talking. This morning I woke up and them 2 were texting. I was like ughhhhh. I dont get what the point is. He hurt her so bad in ways unimaginable. Her whole family is mad at her because of all the drama. He is the main reason that she was in the mental hospital. So this saturday she is gonna hang out with him. I asked if she even cared about how I felt about it and she was like if you dont like it then there is the door. She tells me he wont cross the line but he already crossed once when we were layin on the couch and he is expressing his feelings towards her and she didnt stop him. That hurt really bad. Any advice. I dont want to break up with her. I work so many hours to provide for us and she dont give a dam. Link to comment
Kumatora Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 So this saturday she is gonna hang out with him. I asked if she even cared about how I felt about it and she was like if you dont like it then there is the door. She tells me he wont cross the line but he already crossed once when we were layin on the couch and he is expressing his feelings towards her and she didnt stop him. That hurt really bad. Any advice. I dont want to break up with her. I work so many hours to provide for us and she dont give a dam. Sadly dude, she isn't going to "give a damn." Especially if she tells you "there's the door" and is calling/texting him in the morning. That's being out of line and disrespectful. Tell HER to GT*O. Seriously. If I were you, I would not put up with this behavior at all. What she is doing is treating you like a rebound. If she loved you she wouldn't ask you to leave. Cut her out. Obviously rehab hasn't helped her one bit. Link to comment
Sanesoul Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 Sorry to be so blunt, but you are being a doormat. There's really no advice to give if you won't break up with her. You are just going to have to deal with her walking all over you. Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 I told her that if she does leave me for him, I will fight for our baby. She is mentally unstable and he is just as unstable. I hate giving ultamatems but I told her, am I worth losing over this guy or is he really worth all this. Link to comment
vertigoxo Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 Damn dude. Can you give us their story? Like, what specifically happened to them in the past, from beginning to end? Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 Il try to make it short. They were on and off constantly. He mentally and emotionally and verbally abused her. R-ed her. They fought all the time. He has been trying to break me and her apart. Its way to much to type and its not my business to say all of it. Link to comment
Sanesoul Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 Ok, I just perused your previous threads and I have to ask why you want to be with her? She sounds like a really mean lunatic. I know you want to be a good father to this upcoming baby, but you can do that without dealing with this. She will do nothing but drag you down. Link to comment
vertigoxo Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 Il try to make it short. They were on and off constantly. He mentally and emotionally and verbally abused her. R-ed her. They fought all the time. He has been trying to break me and her apart. Its way to much to type and its not my business to say all of it. They were on and off? For how long? How long ago was their "final break up"? What happened during the break up between them? When did you two meet? Sorry for all the questions, but I could then give you a way better answer if I knew as much as possible about this situation. Either way... I think you deserve better. Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 I dont know why I care about her so much. I guess love works in strange ways. When she is nice she is heartwarming and loving and caring. But I feel as if she is unappreciative towards me. I work 60 hours a week just about with overtime. Its crazy. Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 They were on and off? For how long? How long ago was their "final break up"? What happened during the break up between them? When did you two meet? Sorry for all the questions, but I could then give you a way better answer if I knew as much as possible about this situation. Either way... I think you deserve better. They would be on and off every day. They broke up a year ago. Me and my girl met last summer Link to comment
vertigoxo Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 They would be on and off every day. They broke up a year ago. Me and my girl met last summer You didn't answer some of my other questions. I'm assuming they were a long term/first relationship type of thing they shared. Anyway... She sounds like she has severe issues that she feels the need to include this abusive rapist in her life or else she'll be misreable. A normal person would be more than bliss to have her rapist not being her life in any way possible. How did he try and break you two up? Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 He tried to convince her I am a horrible person and this and that. They were long term. It just breaks my heart knowing this could be the end of it this weekend if she goes to hang out at this guys place. Link to comment
Sanesoul Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 He tried to convince her I am a horrible person and this and that. They were long term. It just breaks my heart knowing this could be the end of it this weekend if she goes to hang out at this guys place. I can almost guarantee it won't be just "hanging out" Link to comment
vertigoxo Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 He tried to convince her I am a horrible person and this and that. They were long term. It just breaks my heart knowing this could be the end of it this weekend if she goes to hang out at this guys place. I have a feeling they will be hanging out to talk things out and make up. Basically... She'll come back, dump you, and go back to him. I am so sorry this had to happen to you. You've been with her, what, 10 months maybe? Thank the Gods that you haven't been with her for years. That would have felt a hella lot worse. You deserve better. They can have each other and destroy each other. I can almost guarantee it won't be just "hanging out" Yup! Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 I know this. With her mental instability issues, if she does leave me, I will have a lawyer ready to try and get full custody of my baby. Link to comment
nicknick Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 Look bud do the right thing here and dump her. . . . . .cos she is definitely gonna dump you very soon. A pre-emptive surgical strike is neccesary........do it mate and quick...you'll feel better for it. Link to comment
gvision Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 she doesn't respect you now, and she wont respect you later. You need to leave her and show her that YOU ARE NOT A TOOL. after that one of two things will happen: 1.) she will realize her mistake and you may take her back (if you want to make her realize her mistake the key is not to give in asap) 2.) she wont realize anything, and will continue to mess her life up either way you will win... IF YOU LEAVE Link to comment
Kumatora Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 I know this. With her mental instability issues, if she does leave me, I will have a lawyer ready to try and get full custody of my baby. Are you capable of supporting a child on your own? With the way she is treating you and the high possibility of dumping you, don't expect her to help you out with child support. Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 I know I can provide for my child. My whole family is behind me and her family is too. They cant believe what she is doing. Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 It sounds like this relationship was doomed from the start. Both of you barely knew each other before she became pregnant, and now that a child is involved, you can't just walk away. I would try to fight for custody, but then again, you need very solid proof that she's an unfit mother, when the time comes. Otherwise, you'll end up paying child support for a long time, since I can't see this relationship ever making it off the ground. Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 I found out just now that she is going saturday night to see how he is doing and if he really made the changes she was gonna give him the chance for a friendship. ugh. Link to comment
Flywest29 Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 Get the hell outta there man. Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 Everyone I have asked for advice has said she is dumb for doing this. Except her, she says she is going to see him saturday to see how he is doing and all. Link to comment
Flywest29 Posted March 18, 2010 Share Posted March 18, 2010 I highly doubt thats all she is going to be doing. I know its rough man and its a hard pill to swallow, but you will be better off in the end without this chick. Link to comment
Distant Posted March 18, 2010 Author Share Posted March 18, 2010 I dont know. Right now she dont know if we are a couple or not. It hurts. Allot. With everything this guy has done she is gonna let this happen to us with him. Link to comment
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