Nooxie Posted May 30, 2004 Share Posted May 30, 2004 Long story short, my boyfriend broke up with me about 1.5 months ago . I was very hurt by the break up, but because of my great friends, and family members, they really managed to help me pick myself up again. Only thing is, as I was finally starting to pick myself up again,and get things back together again, HE CALLS ME!!! Uggggh! I wasn't expecting it at all! There was no reason for him to contact me (He called me over a stupid tax thing), he could have relayed his message through my friend (we have one mutual friend). Well hearing his voice just made me so happy. And even though our conversation was strictly business, he was being so nice... Now, I'm sitting here, wondering, and thinking about him, and HOPING that he'll call me, or email me again! Which sucks cause I know the guy is totally wrong for me. He treated me badly...and I know I can do so much better than him. I just hate the fact that I'm in this depressive state, and sometimes I get scared that it's consuming me, and not allowing me to function. I keep going from my bed, to the TV, to the computer, then repeat cycle. It's so depressing! To top it off, I can't go outside on this gorgeous So. Cal day cause I got a 2nd degree sun burn on my nose, and it kills!! I'm so bummed out... All my friends are out, and I'm stuck in here alone... Someone please help... give me some good advice on how to get over this guy... Link to comment
TheDoctor Posted May 30, 2004 Share Posted May 30, 2004 He called because he wanted to play mind games again not because he cared about his taxes....and it looks like his game is working ( sadly). Just ignore it....remember the bad times and you MUST BE STRONG. Link to comment
kate111 Posted May 31, 2004 Share Posted May 31, 2004 Hi there I know, it sux. Similar thing happened to me too. If you want to suss out why he called you might want to visit the thread "why does the ex call?" contained in the section "getting back together". Link to comment
Nooxie Posted June 1, 2004 Author Share Posted June 1, 2004 Hi there I know, it sux. Similar thing happened to me too. If you want to suss out why he called you might want to visit the thread "why does the ex call?" contained in the section "getting back together". I visited the post...it helped alot. Thank you. I just don't understand why he is calling me now? We were doing perfectly fine with no contact, and using our mutual friend as a means of communication (BTW my friend was doing a great job). Now, he's calling me like it's totally fine! Like we're best friends. I'm being nice, but still just making it strictly business. I just want to get my taxes figured out, and get everything over with, and eliminate contact! Uggggh! I hate hearing his voice... cuase it leaves me wondering why the heck he's being so nice to me? Even though I know he always keeps contact with all his ex's and he's never mean to any of them. But still, all his ex's dumped him...it's different now. He dumped me! Link to comment
Michael2 Posted June 2, 2004 Share Posted June 2, 2004 Nooxie, You were doing so well, then he has the gaul to call. Wow. I suggest the next time he calls you do not pick up. But I know you already think this, but DO IT. I know its hard, I know everytime the phone rings, or you receive a new mail, you hope it is from him. And when you finally realize that it isnt him calling or writing it seems like a small letdown. You have to move on. You can not ALLOW him to continue this crap, okay. If you have to pick up the phone, atleast be the first one to hang up. Keep the conversation short, be a bit distant, not mean, but distant. Telling him you are heading out with a few friends, he will probably ask who, dont tell him. Be aloof, I hate the games, all the nonsense that goes along with no contact. But I stand by it. It helps many to heal, and sometimes it may allow for reconciliaton. If you are unable to not pick up the phone, atleast take my above advice into consideration. Everytime he calls you fall back to square one. You can live without him, you have been doing it for a good amount of time so far. Hang in there! Link to comment
Nooxie Posted June 2, 2004 Author Share Posted June 2, 2004 Thanks Michael! I totally wish I could just ignore the calls. Unfortunatley, it's not like he's calling me out the blue to talk about the weather. He called me because of some unfinished tax business. Thing is, we were communicating through my best friend (and we were doing just fine communicating that way), but out the blue he CALLED ME! And he called me at work! To talk about my taxes! So it's not like I could sit there and slam down the phone on him! Know what I mean? People ARE around, and the guy is trying to help me. Thing is, when he called, he acted a bit immature. Then towards the end, started acting really really sweet. Unfortunatley, this stupid taxes business isn't solved yet, and he called me again today at work. Once again being really really sweet to me. And also including that he was really really tired from Vegas this weekend! Ugggggh! LIke I needed to hear that! However, I do make sure to make the conversations are strictly business, and very short! I don't want him to think I'm sitting here depressed about him. I'm polite, and I give him the information he needs, and then get off the phone. That's it! Only thing is that he's being WAAAAY nice to me (he never even acted this way when we were dating). And I don't know if I'm reading into this niceness incorrectly? And it's giving me hope. It doesn't matter! Regardless, I have to get away from the guy right? Yeah! This talking to him again, is driving me crazy! Link to comment
xxatti Posted June 2, 2004 Share Posted June 2, 2004 Next time he calls you at work you tell him "you cant talk to him right now cause you're BUSY at work", and that if its about your taxes to take it up with your mutual friend who's been handling everything for you till now. Problem solved. Even if he really does have to talk to you personally, you tell him that you're busy and you'll have to call him back. DO NOT TALK TO HIM when he calls. If he is trying to play mind games with you, this will put a crimp in his game and turn things around so that you're in control. Link to comment
Nooxie Posted June 2, 2004 Author Share Posted June 2, 2004 Ha! Ha! Ha! He called me today to tell me that he has the two forms that I need to sign, in order to get my taxes approved. There was a brief moment of silence, so after he said that, and I came back with, "Alright, well you can mail them to me, or just give them to John " He was completely shocked by my response. Cause he replied with, "Well I guess I can mail them to you, if you don't want to see me." I could tell he was offended by that, so me (cuase I ALWAYS pitty him), I start to choke up, and I end up telling him that he can get the forms to me however he wants. He got really hurt by that I could tell... then I quickly cut him off by sayinig I had to go! I did good! Yaaaaaay! I stayed strong! Link to comment
xxatti Posted June 2, 2004 Share Posted June 2, 2004 Good job Nooxie! Im proud of you! =D> Link to comment
Nooxie Posted June 3, 2004 Author Share Posted June 3, 2004 Ugggghhh....today I woke up missing him.. Dang it. Link to comment
CC Posted June 6, 2004 Share Posted June 6, 2004 aawww...don't think about missing him! you were doing really well. i must admit it really sucks when you are lonely and you start thinking about your ex. just remember that you are making him miss you more by being strong. Link to comment
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