so far so good...next step

[brit]

so i spent a bit of time with my ex. we are getting along well, but have never talked about the relationship. he said i looked good and noticed all the weight i lost. we are supposed to get together this week, before he goes on the road again for most of the summer. i know there will be plenty of girls after him, but i want to leave an impression, so that when he does get lonely or fed up with these groupies, he thinks of me. there is nothing romantic going on right now. anyway, i wanted to take him to this amazingly fun different restaurant. do you think it's a good idea? any other ideas? how much longer should i not bring 'us' up. i think this is going to take a while. and btw, everybody, we had a distrous break-up and i followed the no contact rule and built it back up to a friendship, so at least that works.

[purpledreams]

So you want to get back with him but its not happening yet? A restaurant is a good idea, im just not sure what you want out of the night other than having him think of you for his summer. I reckon you should let him know how you feel if you really want himback. Talk about what you've learnt and how you want the reship to be

[Belle]

Who did the breaking up Brit? That would depend on whether or not you bring it up. But I've read up on this and the suggestion is that you not talk about the relationship until they do. I did and I went from being able to see the guy the next day (his suggestion right off the bat) to not having seen him since the first conversation a week ago. So... I would opt for leaving it for now.

 

Belle

[brit]

he did the breaking up, and i didn't handle it well. i was a mess and would call all the time etc... until he asked me to leave him alone. but truthfully, i wasn't just messed up over him; a friend of mine died of cancer and i just couldn't handle him breaking up with me too. i think he just found the whole thing too overwhelming and i was acting too clingy and needy. even though he's enjoying his freedom, i do remember him telling me that the one person who broke his heart was a friend of his he had known for seven years who he started dating for a month but it didn't work. so my strategy was to build up a friendship because we never had that. any other advice?