Reality of dying holding me back from living.

[top bloke]

I had my heart attack at 37 years old.Had 3 totally blocked arteries!! They stented me and I am still alive.. I am lucky to be here and yet sometimes I wonder?

I am married 2 kids..1 wife only The hardest thing for me was not death..but the reality that while I am going well fitness wise that I am not supposed to push myself hard .

I have learnt to love life more in this time. I am a happier better more caring person.

My problem is psychologically I feel flat. I was a pepped up guy up for any challenge in business and life. I gave 300 percent. I loved it!! I felt so alive. Now I feel alot better physically ..running doing weights eating great food...but I am beaking the rules for heart attack people.

Work has been just plodding along but now again I feel the need to fly.. its been nearly 4 years. I know it can kill me if I take on too much...but I am prepared to take the risk to make me feel alive again.

This voice inside me is screaming go on champion...go rock the world!! I believe that I can but know it can kill me...the problem is that I dont care anymore if I die trying.. I want to look after my family...I dont want to hold back .Life is too short to live like this.

Maybe im nuts? But I want it ....

What do you think?

[Seraphim]

Let me tell you something. My dad had a heart attack at 39 and open heart surgery at 40. He stopped living at moment. Everything in the entire world was going to kill him etc. He even quit working even though his dr said he was tough as an Ox. Well he is still alive some 24 years later(he is 64) and you know what? He is still wallowing in his own misery and living on disability.

It is a set back, a wake up call. Do not let it stop you in your tracks.

[taxi10]

Live in this world as you will never die and enjoy it to the utmost.

[jul-els]

I usually always say if you don't do what makes you happy, then life isn't worth living. But you have a family to care for too, and I'm sure being around to experience their lives is something that will make you happy too. I think it's important to find your happiness and also important to find a balance in doing so.

[agent1607307371]

Plod along, fly along. Die anyway.

 

How old are your kids? Because maybe you can find the spot where you're not plodding, but not flying too close to the sun either.

[top bloke]

Let me tell you something. My dad had a heart attack at 39 and open heart surgery at 40. He stopped living at moment. Everything in the entire world was going to kill him etc. He even quit working even though his dr said he was tough as an Ox. Well he is still alive some 24 years later(he is 64) and you know what? He is still wallowing in his own misery and living on disability.

It is a set back, a wake up call. Do not let it stop you in your tracks.

I have to admit that I did have a hard time with energy levels as a result of my medication.I have sincefound an exercise and diet combination by myself that has given most of my energy back.

Now these real roadblocks fixed ..my hunger ..passion for life is very high..

Btw the worst medication is lipitor. A cholesterol drug which single handedly nearly forced me to retire ! It exhausted me and made my body ache all of the time. I switched to simvar a different type and felt alot better.

Mentally i have never given up the ghost...always kept vigilant...

I feel that dying is easy..but not living/ holdingback is a fate worse than death...

[top bloke]

I usually always say if you don't do what makes you happy, then life isn't worth living. But you have a family to care for too, and I'm sure being around to experience their lives is something that will make you happy too. I think it's important to find your happiness and also important to find a balance in doing so.

This is it as well. I want to see them grow up and have to wonder wheres the balance?

[penelope13]

While of course you have a responsibility to your family to not take unnecessary risks, you are no use for them if you are emotionally/ psychologically not happy.

 

You cannot put your life on hold out of fear. Even without any medical condition, anyone could die any day (accidents do happen), thus the possibility of a premature death is around us all the time. Nevertheless we should try to enjoy life as much as possible.

 

If I understand correctly, you had a fast paced, energetic, risk filled life before your accident. And I understand that you want to have that feeling again that nothing can stop you, but yourself.

 

I am sure you will find something that can create this feeling again without an unwarranted amount of risk.

 

Am glad to hear that overall you are feeling better!

[top bloke]

Plod along, fly along. Die anyway.

 

How old are your kids? Because maybe you can find the spot where you're not plodding, but not flying too close to the sun either.

I feel my answer lays here. I have to not take it to the max to reap the benefits..I can take it up a few notches but make it more effective than my competition ..more intelligent and bring in more money with less effort. I think this is the smart way to do it and still get the thrill of achieving success in this area.

[top bloke]

While of course you have a responsibility to your family to not take unnecessary risks, you are no use for them if you are emotionally/ psychologically not happy.

 

You cannot put your life on hold out of fear. Even without any medical condition, anyone could die any day (accidents do happen), thus the possibility of a premature death is around us all the time. Nevertheless we should try to enjoy life as much as possible.

 

If I understand correctly, you had a fast paced, energetic, risk filled life before your accident. And I understand that you want to have that feeling again that nothing can stop you, but yourself.

 

I am sure you will find something that can create this feeling again without an unwarranted amount of risk.

 

Am glad to hear that overall you are feeling better!

Penelope thank you. However I have no fear of death...none whatsoever. If I had to lay down my life to protect someone I would do it.. No fear to regrets..I was born live and will die.I have accepted this long ago.

For me this thread was coming to terms with a balance that I need to not be stupid and kill myself unnecessarily through over enthisiasm and where I will be happy at my real max level.

I have realised my error as I post...you see I associated hard work ..wheeling and dealing as success...I am wrong. Sucess and the excitement of sucess in life should be to preserve oneself while having maximum impact with the most efficient means and minimum effort. I feel that reaping the massive potential benefits will give me this.

I was younger very courageous ..a go getter in ever sense but worked too darn hard and was in the middle of it.The money poured in...I was good at it.

I can see clearly now...life is an adaptation for each person to grow. I simply cannot do the work of 10 men like I used to..I have to think smarter...I believe I have found my answer

[penelope13]

^ that's great!

[waveseer]

My dad died of a genetic heart disease at 77 but his arteries were perfectly clear! Why did he live so long with the limitations he had no control over? Not because he ate a great diet, not because he didn't smoke cigars, not because he ever followed anyone's advice, but because he was a runner!

[Seraphim]

What I was saying is, really do not let it hold you back from doing what you want to do. My dad let it ruin his entire life and he has lived another 24 years LONGER. His "life is a misery and I can not possibly do anything cause I have a heart problem "mentality is killing him more than the heart issue it's self. Not that I think you have that attitude at all, but really reach for all you can.

[top bloke]

Thank you all You are the best

[Cimmie]

Was your heart attack specifically stress-related or do you have a genetic cholesterol problem (or both?)

 

I think you need to avoid the kind of internalised stress that puts pressure on your body/arteries, so you need to learn the difference between positive stimulation and the exhilaration of pressure. It should be very possible for you to live a really rich and fulfilled life without running yourself ragged. It's certainly possible to feel exhilaration without doing harm to your body - you just need to explore outlets for doing that.

 

I'm presuming you had a really high-stress, adrenaline-junkie kind of lifestyle before your h/a?

[jul-els]

This is it as well. I want to see them grow up and have to wonder wheres the balance?

 

I think the balance comes from a knowledge of how far you can go and not going too far. Keeping all the facets of life in their proper perspective relative to each other and how they fit best for you in your life. Underneath it all it's really about accepting limitations where necessary and making the choices that would best contribute to your health and happiness in the overall. Keeping your expectations real and always having gratitude for the blessings you have. No matter what you're doing, a joyful heart is the key to happiness.