WWright502 Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 To me a female of course. I enjoy more of the sweet romancey stuff before the actual sex part. It seems to my husband that he would just rather start with the sex & not worry with all the kissy romantic stuff? I don't get it? Most men like the sex over the sweet stuff. I think the romantic stuff is just as or more important as the sex itself & its a lot less sticky & sweaty haha. I would like guys opinons on this Link to comment
barrakuda Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 I guess it all depends of the guy. I love to build up tension and to tease my girl. I really need to be trying new fantasies and role playing otherwise just sex would be reaaally boring. Also, cuddling after sex and falling sleep together is my favorite part. Link to comment
lostandhurt Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 For me it has always been about the womans pleasure during intimacy. I get more pleasure knowing that I am making her feel so much from my touch. There can be no selfishness in bed if there is to be true intimacy. There have been times when I could care less if I orgasm. I just wanted to bring her pleasure. Some men never realize that making love is not the same as having sex. Lost Link to comment
ohemgee Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 How could someone not like sex more? Sticky? Sweaty? You seem grossed out by sex... Link to comment
WWright502 Posted October 2, 2009 Author Share Posted October 2, 2009 How could someone not like sex more? Sticky? Sweaty? You seemed grossed out by sex... Well I kinda am lol.. It is sticky, sweaty & I feel ikky afterwards Link to comment
WWright502 Posted October 2, 2009 Author Share Posted October 2, 2009 Thanks for the comments Link to comment
lostandhurt Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 That is why we have showers. And taking them together is even better! Lost Link to comment
Day_Walker Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 I think that intimacy and sex are equally important. However there are certain people (both men and women) who prefer one over the other. I think at certain times you can get away with having one and not the other but there definitely needs to be both to a level where both people in a relationship are satisfied. Link to comment
mr.mac Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 I definitely don't prefer sex over intimacy. I think they go hand in hand and I generally want to have sex because I crave the intimacy that goes along with it. I love foreplay as much the act of sex as much as the post-sex cuddling. They all are one collective entity as far as I'm concerned. Link to comment
ohdammm Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 so men... how do us females tell our men that we want more intimacy during/before sex instead of them just saying "hey lets have sex".. like for instance.. last night my boyfriend and i are laying there, and he says to me.. come here and f me.. REALLY???? I mean, him and i have a great sex life, but you really think thats a way to get me all wet and ready to go? I just want him to be more...i dont know, INTIMATE! Make me WANT to have sex, turn me on.. dont just expect me to jump on your bones the moment you lay into bed.. so how do i tell him what i want out of all of this without sounding like he doesnt turn me on anymore, because he does..? Link to comment
Day_Walker Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 I just want him to be more...i dont know, INTIMATE! Make me WANT to have sex, turn me on.. dont just expect me to jump on your bones the moment you lay into bed.. I think that part of your problem, you are expecting him to put in effort to make you want sex. First I think that YOU should do something that turns you on and gets you in the mood rather than expecting him to make you want sex. Link to comment
mr.mac Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 so how do i tell him what i want out of all of this without sounding like he doesnt turn me on anymore, because he does..? The direct approach. Tell him you want more intimacy and tell him you want to be romanced. I would be receptive to hearing that. I think most guys (not all) would much rather get direct information than be left to guess or figure things out on our own. If we are left to guess we're taking the easiest route. Link to comment
KG Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 Our first go round was animalistic....hungry for it. Round 2 was soft and romantic, stretching it out. You can have both. Link to comment
WWright502 Posted October 2, 2009 Author Share Posted October 2, 2009 Haha there is never an animalistic hunger for sex lol its not THAT important. I don't get why sex is "craved" so to speak ... ? Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 Haha there is never an animalistic hunger for sex lol its not THAT important. I don't get why sex is "craved" so to speak ... ? Have you and your husband gone to relationship/marriage counseling for your frigidity issues? I remember from your previous thread. Link to comment
b89 Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 Coming from a girl, I think both parts are crazy important! I know if my boyfriend couldn't have the sex part, he'd die! But he loves to cuddle too. I wish I could know what it's like being a guy, because I feel like there's something more to sex for men than us women realize. It's almost like he expects sex whenever he feels like it, but when he doesn't want it (and I do), expects me to relax. Which sucks because good sex depends on whether or not he's turned on...I'll get there eventually anyway, but he won't always... eg. I love fooling around in the morning, but he doesn't like it...man, if he were turned on in the morning it would be mind-blowinggggg lol...but what does he know...he's just a guy! Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted October 2, 2009 Share Posted October 2, 2009 Haha there is never an animalistic hunger for sex lol its not THAT important. I don't get why sex is "craved" so to speak ... ? Are you kidding? As a woman...I don't really make love and never really have. In fact, I don't think romance is that big of a deal. It's rare and that's why it's nice. Because when he does pull out the romance, I know it's genuine and not to just get into my pants. We can knock boots without the lovey stuff. So, when he is being lovey, I know it's not just a means to an end. I also agree with Daywalker. Do you ever make an effort to get him in the mood? Do you do romantic things for him? Link to comment
Theblueman123 Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 I guess it depends on the person's view on sex. Men typically view sex as an expression of their love (which it should be), and women see sex as a component of love. Everyone prefers one over the other, but both are good in equal doses. But for me, I would have to sex that intimacy clearly is more important than sex, to me it would be like trying to compare the sun to the moon. Sure we need both, but one is far more important. I would also have to say that it's not so much the intimacy, but the security in knowing that you have someone that makes it much sweeter. Knowing that you have someone for you there--always, no matter what. And yes, you can make love without having sex. Link to comment
TBE_1989 Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 I love foreplay as much the act of sex as much as the post-sex cuddling. They all are one collective entity as far as I'm concerned. I agree, I'm the same Link to comment
greywolf Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 OP didn't you post a thread very similar to this once, asking why people thought sex was important? I doubt you're going to get any different answers here. For me, sex is just as important if not more than all the romantic gestures. Link to comment
furious Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 Haha there is never an animalistic hunger for sex lol its not THAT important. I don't get why sex is "craved" so to speak ... ? it's craved so the species can stay alive. humans are animals. Link to comment
Theblueman123 Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 it's craved so the species can stay alive. humans are animals. If you want to categorize us, then you're right. Though I find it demeaning to consider oneself in the likeness of an animal, especially considering our cognitive ability. Link to comment
hexaemeron Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 If you want to categorize us, then you're right. Though I find it demeaning to consider oneself in the likeness of an animal, especially considering our cognitive ability. Hmm... May I ask why, exactly? Are we not a part of the bounty of life on this planet? Did we not evolve from the bounty of life on this planet? Link to comment
greywolf Posted October 3, 2009 Share Posted October 3, 2009 If you want to categorize us, then you're right. Though I find it demeaning to consider oneself in the likeness of an animal, especially considering our cognitive ability. It doesn't mean that we don't have instincts. Humans have very strong survival instincts from the day they're born. Link to comment
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