Men only, are prostitutes a lot more technically skilled than the average woman?

[jackie100]

Just curious to know... Are prostitutes/escorts/massage parlor girls in general better in bed and are they better technically in terms of technique in bed than the average woman? I'm talking about things like applying the right amount of pressure, suction, deepthroating, bj techniques etc?

 

I know it depends on the person and a hooker can also be a dead lay or wanting to get out of there etc but in general I am just wondering how they compare to a "normal" women who is extremely good looking, very open-minded and extremely kinky?

 

I am guess I am asking because if I had sex with a guy who has been with hookers in the past I would feel intimidated that the hookers would have been "technically" better than me in terms of technique etc even though I watched craploads of porn and read about all the tips etc on how to please a man. I would still feel inadequate to the prostitutes in the past somehow.

 

I am just curious to know if prostitutes are the "ultimate" sexual experience a man can have, like the best of the best? Can there ever be any better or can a normal woman who is super hot never even compare and come close to the prostitute?

[Lucius]

"Technical skill" means very little in the overall experience. Truly. It's not a sport, or a game of chess; it's either loving or it's carnal - or some combination of the two. It's not a precision science. I mean yeah: technical skill beats total incompetence, I'll grant you that. But I would much rather be with a woman who was less technically skilled and more sincere/fun/passionate, than a woman who had crazy technique and no real interest or investment.

 

In short: I don't care how technically skilled a hooker is; she's a hooker. I'd take genuine, real, intimate sex over a fake, emotionally hollow experience any day. No contest.

 

But hey. Maybe that's just me.

[d24]

In short: I don't care how technically skilled a hooker is; she's a hooker. I'd take genuine, real, intimate sex over a fake, emotionally hollow experience any day. No contest.

 

I doubt you'll get a better response than that.

Or a different one for that matter.

Should we close this thread haha

[jackie100]

"Technical skill" means very little in the overall experience. Truly. It's not a sport, or a game of chess; it's either loving or it's carnal - or some combination of the two. It's not a precision science. I mean yeah: technical skill beats total incompetence, I'll grant you that. But I would much rather be with a woman who was less technically skilled and more sincere/fun/passionate, than a woman who had crazy technique and no real interest or investment.

 

In short: I don't care how technically skilled a hooker is; she's a hooker. I'd take genuine, real, intimate sex over a fake, emotionally hollow experience any day. No contest.

 

But hey. Maybe that's just me.

 

I am actually surprised by that answer. I thought most guys would prefer sex with a stranger just for the simple fact that it IS a stranger and therefore more exciting, more stimulating, more thrilling, more dirtier (just by the fact that she was a hooker) more variety etc.

 

Some guys already have real intimate sex with their girlfriends but still like to have sex with hookers on the side for the thrill I think...

Guys get sick of their girlfriends after awhile no matter HOW hot she is and how dirty she is. Eventually most will want something new.

That's what I have noticed from my OWN experiences. I'm not saying it's always so but this is what I noticed.

 

I'm not a guy so I don't know what guys think. It's just that I personally "think" that a lot of guys (not ALL, but a lot), prefer variety and sexual excitement over a woman who is sincere and passionate and seriously eager to please because she wants to. I never really met a guy appreciated that or was into that. It seems to me that most guys prefer anonymous sex, casual sex, going on Craigslist for sex etc. It just seems to me that most guys prefer anonymous sex and "Exciting" sex and "newness". From what I have seen most guys get tired of the same woman after awhile and they will want something new, even if their wife or gf is supermodel hot... They might still want that cheap thrill with a hooker (like Hugh Grant for example) or want something on the side.

 

I don't think that most guys care about intimacy and such at all. Since you say you do, I believe you but I can't help but think most guys prefer skill and the excitement of conquering a new woman. For example, I once watched an episode of Jerry Springer (bad example I know, but still an example) of a guy who had a gf but he wanted to participate in a gangbang with a pornstar and his gf objected to that so they were fighting onstage etc but in the end he ended up doing the gangbang because his desire for a "pornstar" and someone "really dirty and experienced" superseded his love for his girlfriend. Same case in another episode where a guy picked getting lapdances from strippers over his gf. I know Jerry Springer is a bad example to use but these are just examples of cases where guys always pick the "thrill". I really think most guys in life are like that as well.

 

Also, I thought that sex was the strongest drive a man had, 100x stronger than the drive for "romance", "emotional intimacy" etc

That's why I assumed men would prefer the experience of a prostitute. For some men that drive is SO strong they would risk their lives for that one thrill, they would risk their career, they would risk the presidency of the united states, their family, their children. The sex drive is the strongest drive for most males I would think, not romance or intimacy.

 

I think most women seriously underestimate how strong a man's sex drive is. Some men would risk DEATH for that one thrill.

[diabolik]

I am just curious to know if prostitutes are the "ultimate" sexual experience a man can have, like the best of the best? Can there ever be any better or can a normal woman who is super hot never even compare and come close to the prostitute?

Guys don't use prostitutes for an amazing sexual experience. They use them for variety and for the fact that it is no strings attached. In a sense, they pay the prostitute not so much for the sex but for her to leave afterward. This is especially true for married men - most of them don't want to deal with the headaches and risks associated with having an affair, so prostitutes offer a convenient solution. Most 'high class' prostitutes will tell you that married men are their main clients.

I am actually surprised by that answer. I thought most guys would prefer sex with a stranger just for the simple fact that it IS a stranger and therefore more exciting, more stimulating, more thrilling, more dirtier (just by the fact that she was a hooker) more variety etc.

There is a difference between an eager and willing stranger and a paid prostitute.

I don't think that most guys care about intimacy and such at all.

'At all' is very strong phrasing, but I would agree that the emotional connection required for sex is much, much lower for the average man than for the average woman. I think the male opinion on ENA is skewed toward requiring an emotional connection and intimacy for two reasons. One, the average guy here is probably more emotionally sensitive than in the real world. Two, even though the site is anonymous, people often care about the reputations associated with their usernames, so they may be less than candid - a guy isn't going to be very popular on a female dominated site like ENA if he comes out and says he will have sex with any attractive woman if the opportunity presents itself, regardless of whether he has any sort of emotional connection with her. I know I would, but lots of guys wouldn't admit to it, even if they felt that way.

 

OK, better go find my flak jacket.

[jackie100]

Yes, I already knew that most prostitutes clients are married man. I researched a lot of prostitution and read all the popular prostitute escort review guides worldwide so I would say I am quite informed... I even know all the acronyms, bbj, greek, cim etc.

 

I think some guys might even prefer the prostitute over a willing stranger because the prostitute is "dirtier". I watched an episode of "Hookers At The Point" on hbo and one client wanted to hear how many clients the hooker had before him and she said "7" etc... They like the fact that she got used earlier that night...

 

I don't see anything wrong with guys admitting that they are ok with anonymous sex. I have had casual sex with strangers before and I see nothing wrong with that. I don't think an emotional connection is necessary to have sex.

 

And I agree with you. I think most men would definitely have sex with any attractive woman if the opportunity presented itself.

[diabolik]

I think some guys might even prefer the prostitute over a willing stranger because the prostitute is "dirtier". I watched an episode of "Hookers At The Point" on hbo and one client wanted to hear how many clients the hooker had before him and she said "7" etc... They like the fact that she got used earlier that night...

Maybe that's a fetish? That would definitely gross me out.

[jackie100]

Maybe that's a fetish? That would definitely gross me out.

 

Yea, it was probably a fetish...

[EQD]

you seem like you've been jaded.

i hope one day you get over it.

it seems like you are using this to devalue your idea of sex and men. possibly because you've just been crushed.

 

there are good guys out there.

 

and if all men looovveeddd prostitution then it wouldnt be illegal in the USA. all the guys who make the laws and all the guys who vote to approve or disapprove them would have seen to that.

so there is your proof.

now ask yourself how many men do you personally know have been to a prostitute. enjoy prostitutes, and frequent prostitutes...

make a poll on here if you'd like.

[Lucius]

I am actually surprised by that answer. I thought most guys would prefer sex with a stranger just for the simple fact that it IS a stranger and therefore more exciting, more stimulating, more thrilling, more dirtier (just by the fact that she was a hooker) more variety etc.

 

What can I say? The thought of having sex with a hooker gives me a resounding feeling of "meh". My emotional and sexual response to that scenario is not dissimilar to the thought of masturbating. It's empty. Now, the thought of having sex with a woman I was attracted to both physically and emotionally (like my fiancee) ... that's more like it.

 

But hey, some men do dig "empty". Some women do, too. That's a reflection of intimacy issues, not gender disposition.

 

Some guys already have real intimate sex with their girlfriends but still like to have sex with hookers on the side for the thrill I think...

Guys get sick of their girlfriends after awhile no matter HOW hot she is and how dirty she is. Eventually most will want something new.

That's what I have noticed from my OWN experiences. I'm not saying it's always so but this is what I noticed.

 

I really cannot agree with your characterization of guys in general; it's not true for me, nor the men I personally know. There's elements of truth there, but your conclusions are a bit out of whack, IMO.

 

Sex with a stranger can be thrilling, yes, but it's a cheap thrill. It is my opinion that only a man with intimacy issues would prefer that over sex with an attractive woman he cared for.

 

Also, we don't all "get sick of [our] girlfriends". That's not true at all - not for all, or even most of us. Both men and women need to work at keeping sex interesting after a long time, and men are wired to find various women attractive, but that in no way equates to getting sick of our partners. I think you're divesting my gender of a large portion of our emotionality. Your experience of men seems one-sided; I see little understanding of emotionally healthy men, but a great comprehension of emotionally stunted ones. There's a distinct difference.

 

For example, I once watched an episode of Jerry Springer (bad example I know, but still an example) of a guy who had a gf but he wanted to participate in a gangbang with a pornstar and his gf objected to that so they were fighting onstage etc but in the end he ended up doing the gangbang because his desire for a "pornstar" and someone "really dirty and experienced" superseded his love for his girlfriend. Same case in another episode where a guy picked getting lapdances from strippers over his gf. I know Jerry Springer is a bad example to use but these are just examples of cases where guys always pick the "thrill". I really think most guys in life are like that as well.

 

If you're taking your examples from Jerry Springer, and they seem indicative to you of how men behave in real life, then I reiterate my earlier speculation: you're underexposed to emotionally healthy, grown-up men. The males on that program are intended to represent the absolute dregs of the gender - both intellectually and emotionally. They are parodies of extremes - a menagerie of stereotypical gender flaws. To in any way extrapolate their values onto the rest of us is a wacky leap of logic indeed.

 

Also, I thought that sex was the strongest drive a man had, 100x stronger than the drive for "romance", "emotional intimacy" etc

That's why I assumed men would prefer the experience of a prostitute. For some men that drive is SO strong they would risk their lives for that one thrill, they would risk their career, they would risk the presidency of the united states, their family, their children. The sex drive is the strongest drive for most males I would think, not romance or intimacy.

 

We're a little more complicated than mere sex robots. Emotionality and intimacy do indeed factor into our decisions and preferences. Indeed, one of the primary flaws in your thinking (as I see it) is the way in which you divorce emotional intimacy from male sex drives. They're far from wholly separate. We want a woman, a person, a partner - not a robot with exceptional technique. If you want to reference drive, consider WHY we have that drive; to mate. A prostitute is no substitute for a wife - for a mother of our children. And a man, just like a woman, is far more than the sum of his primal drives. At least, a grown-up man is.

 

I think most women seriously underestimate how strong a man's sex drive is. Some men would risk DEATH for that one thrill.

 

Well, I've yet to meet one who would.

 

Sex is great. I have it regularly. I would, however, never risk DEATH for it. That's insane. The only thing I would risk death for - which is the same reason many men go to war - would be to protect my family. How's that for motivation?

 

I think you need to broaden the spectrum of men you know. It sounds like the fools you've been around have severely soured your impression of the rest of us. It's a shame.

[jackie100]

you seem like you've been jaded.

i hope one day you get over it.

it seems like you are using this to devalue your idea of sex and men. possibly because you've just been crushed.

 

there are good guys out there.

 

No, I haven't really been crushed. My ex was with hookers before he met me. It was before we even dated so why would that crush me? He had the right to do whatever he wanted since he wasn't with me at the time.

 

We were pretty open so he told me everything. He even showed me the street where he picked them up... I already knew about that street beforehand (EVERYONE in the county where I live knows what street it is because it's just well known) but he showed me the exact spots he would pick up girls. He even wanted to show me how he negotiated for the girl and wanted to talk to one when I was there but I told him not to because I didn't really feel comfortable...

 

I'm not jaded for reals. I just know that a lot of guys visit hookers and prostitutes and massage parlors. For example, my ex's sister's husband used to go to massage parlors all the time after she gave birth because she couldn't have sex for awhile and he wanted the whole thing, not just blowjobs etc... My ex's best friend is a massage parlor addict. My ex told me his sister's ex bf used to go to massage parlors all the time even when he was dating my ex's sister (my ex didn't mind)...

 

I am not jaded. I think it's just a fact that most guys go to prostitutes etc in the United States. It's just very prevalent.

 

I think a lot of women are ignorant and unaware and think "Oh my husband would NEVER do such a thing" but the thing is that they just have no clue. Most likely their husbands have done it but will lie until their dying day.

[EQD]

I rest my case. and i agree with lucius

 

i'm not saying some men dont see prostitutes and escort girls, or hell even have one night random stands.. but those men are a minority by far.

and really... jerry springer??? you know they are actors right?

[EQD]

and last note about your ex, what you wrote about him telling you about his prostitution loving ways... even showing you the street he picked them up at.... seems like he was intentionally devaluing you. so yes... i am now sincerely convinced you were just in a terrible relationship with a sleazy crappy man.. and thus you are now jaded into thinking they are all or mostly like that.

 

you'll get over it

[jackie100]

I rest my case. and i agree with lucius

 

i'm not saying some men dont see prostitutes and escort girls, or hell even have one night random stands.. but those men are a minority by far.

and really... jerry springer??? you know they are actors right?

 

Yea, I do know their actors. I also know that all reality shows are scripted and have actors. They are actors but I think the scenarios I described on the Jerry Springer show are accurate, those are things that could happen in real life. Most men faced with the choice of indulging in a perverse gangbang with a dirty pornstar that they have been fantasizing above their whole life will pick that over a relationship any day. My point was to emphasize how incredibly strong a man's sex drive is, it basically overpowers everything else.

 

and last note about your ex, what you wrote about him telling you about his prostitution loving ways... even showing you the street he picked them up at.... seems like he was intentionally devaluing you. so yes... i am now sincerely convinced you were just in a terrible relationship with a sleazy crappy man.. and thus you are now jaded into thinking they are all or mostly like that.

 

you'll get over it

 

No, he showed it to me because I asked I think. I don't remember exactly what we said specifically because it was very long ago but I think I was the one who kept prying and asking questions because I was interested in knowing about his past... He showed one spot where he picked them up and I think I asked about the other ones... Not sure 100 percent sure though. And he said he only showed it to me because he wanted me to know "who he really was" because he didn't want to hide anything from me. So he was actually being honest, which I appreciate. I always like knowing the exact details because I'm a very nosy person.

[EQD]

you. dated. a. sleazy. guy.

 

i dont know one man personally or online who has went and even thought about seeing a prostitute, escort, etc.

i do know one who WANTED to be a prostitute.. but he didnt do it.

thats another story in itself.

 

and... have you seen some of the retarded shows on jerry springer?

alot of things are possible. yes. but its YOUR job as a woman to avoid idiot men like your ex.

but, if you are alright with dating men who sleep with prostitutes (as clearly you were) then dont be surprised when you (gasp) date men who have slept with prostitutes!

[jackie100]

you. dated. a. sleazy. guy.

 

i dont know one man personally or online who has went and even thought about seeing a prostitute, escort, etc.

i do know one who WANTED to be a prostitute.. but he didnt do it.

thats another story in itself.

 

and... have you seen some of the retarded shows on jerry springer?

alot of things are possible. yes. but its YOUR job as a woman to avoid idiot men like your ex.

but, if you are alright with dating men who sleep with prostitutes (as clearly you were) then dont be surprised when you (gasp) date men who have slept with prostitutes!

 

But how would you know for sure though that any of the men you know never saw a prostitute. I think this is something most men would vehemently deny and take with them to their grave. All sorts of normal men visit prostitutes; doctors, lawyers, heads of states... It's not just "sleazy" guys that do it, it's the normal guy, the nice guy, the family man, etc and you would never know it. No guy would ever admit to it! The thing is that you can never know for sure. I am willing to bet that some of the men you know have been with prostitutes, you just don't know about it because they are discreet. I mean this isn't exactly the thing guys brag to their female friends etc.

 

Some guys go on sex vacations and are so discreet that they even don't tell their own guy friends.

[EQD]

you are starting to contradict yourself. because in your experience they tell the women they date.

 

as for how i know, how do you know?

 

this ex of yours seems to have planted a very very paranoid seed in your head. And of course you being the 'nosy' one as you put it (i'm assuming because you are insecure at the base of it) this 'revalation' is tearing you up.

hence your thread, your devaluation of sex, and your low standards and ideals for men in general.

 

and yes... it is just sleazy guys who do it. normal people get sex through normal means.

[jackie100]

you are starting to contradict yourself. because in your experience they tell the women they date.

 

as for how i know, how do you know?

 

this ex of yours seems to have planted a very very paranoid seed in your head. And of course you being the 'nosy' one as you put it (i'm assuming because you are insecure at the base of it) this 'revalation' is tearing you up.

hence your thread, your devaluation of sex, and your low standards and ideals for men in general.

 

and yes... it is just sleazy guys who do it. normal people get sex through normal means.

 

No, the guys never told the women they dated. I know because my EX told me. HE was the one who said his sister's husband goes to massage parlors (and my ex didn't mind btw) and HE was the one who told me his other sister's ex bf also went to massage parlors.

 

There is another female I know who found out her bf was using craigslist for casual sex and cheating on her because she hacked into his e-mail account. Guys never ever EVER tell a woman they are cheating or having sex with hookers. When it comes out it's by accident.

 

I still don't think it's just "sleazy" guys who do it. Some guys want the convenience of not having a relationship and have a hard time finding a FWB. Other times the guy is lazy and just wants sex. Some may want variety. I don't think that makes it "sleazy".

[bulletproof]

I don't think an emotional connection is necessary to have sex.

 

You are projecting. You think that because you hold these beliefs, other people must also feel the same.

 

This is less about sex and more about intimacy. I would guess that most people, both male and female, prefer an intimate experience over an "exciting" one.

[jackie100]

You are projecting. You think that because you hold these beliefs, other people must also feel the same.

 

This is less about sex and more about intimacy. I would guess that most people, both male and female, prefer an intimate experience over an "exciting" one.

 

I think most males prefer "exciting" sexual experiences and most women prefer intimacy. I'm different than most women though, I'm not into the lovey dovey crap so I like excitement too. I think that SOME guys may prefer intimacy and I agree 100 percent with what Diabolik said :

 

"'At all' is very strong phrasing, but I would agree that the emotional connection required for sex is much, much lower for the average man than for the average woman. I think the male opinion on ENA is skewed toward requiring an emotional connection and intimacy for two reasons. One, the average guy here is probably more emotionally sensitive than in the real world. Two, even though the site is anonymous, people often care about the reputations associated with their usernames, so they may be less than candid - a guy isn't going to be very popular on a female dominated site like ENA if he comes out and says he will have sex with any attractive woman if the opportunity presents itself, regardless of whether he has any sort of emotional connection with her. I know I would, but lots of guys wouldn't admit to it, even if they felt that way."

[bulletproof]

 

I am guess I am asking because if I had sex with a guy who has been with hookers in the past I would feel intimidated that the hookers would have been "technically" better than me in terms of technique etc even though I watched craploads of porn and read about all the tips etc on how to please a man. I would still feel inadequate to the prostitutes in the past somehow.

 

You say that you'd feel inadequate, then go on to say that it didn't bother you that your ex did just that? Either it bothered you or it didn't. Which is it?

 

Most of your threads here run the same course- you propose some very skewed view of how the world looks to you, and when people try to tell you that it isn't the case for others or even most people, you argue it. It just seems like you could really benefit from some intense therapy.

[EQD]

ok. so lets help her out a little bit here and tell her more personal first hand accounts so she can sync herself more with the real world and not HBO, jerry springer, and one particularly off ex with particularly off sisters boyfriend things...

 

i know 2 guys right now who for sure have never done anything you claim to be 'typical' and who are waiting for the right girl to come along.

men are human. they have feelings too. just because they can have a higher sex drive doesnt mean they are skanks.

[jackie100]

Sorry, I didn't see this earlier...

 

As for death, I'm talking about guys who would do risky acts like have anal sex WITHOUT A CONDOM on a street prostitute in some third world country. I read on a prostitute review board where there was a topic about the most "exciting encounter you ever had with a sex worker" and this is what one of the guys said... Most guys would probably not do something risky like that but there are some guys whose sex drives are so strong they would risk death for a cheap thrill.

 

You are right that men do value emotional intimacy but what I have noticed in the ones that do is that they like to have their cake and eat it too. I noticed there are some guys who really like having the "Family Life" and wife at home whom they love (to fulfill their intimacy needs) but then they also have cheap thrills (hookers or go on craigslist casual encounters) on the side. A lot of these guys would never leave their wives but they have a deep desire for "something on the side". I noticed this from just reading the ads on CL. So many of them are married man and they say so in their ads.

[EQD]

look at where you are getting all your information from. you are obsessed with proving this to yourself arent you?

 

what do you expect to find on prostitute review boards? someone saying 'i've never slept with a prostitute and i dont ever want to' ???

[jackie100]

You say that you'd feel inadequate, then go on to say that it didn't bother you that your ex did just that? Either it bothered you or it didn't. Which is it?

 

Most of your threads here run the same course- you propose some very skewed view of how the world looks to you, and when people try to tell you that it isn't the case for others or even most people, you argue it. It just seems like you could really benefit from some intense therapy.

 

It didn't bother me because he did it before he met me and therefore he had the right to do whatever he wanted. I'm not a super moral person and not religious and I don't see anything wrong with prostitution morally. If they want to legalize it I have no problem with it!

 

Of course I would feel inadequate compared to a prostitute because she's the epitome of what men desire sexually. It's hard for a normal woman to compare to that I think. I don't think any enthusiasm or good attitude from a normal woman can compare with the thrill a prostitute can give a guy. It could be that I feel inferior to a hooker because I don't have her experience (getting with 10 guys a day would probably give you quite a bit) and because I don't feel as desirable as a hooker I guess. Yes. I know there are all kinds of hookers, good looking ones, ugly ones, fat ones. I've seen a lot of their pics etc... It just seems like a lot of guys just have a thing for hookers and no normal woman can compare sexually.