Best way to give a dog away?

[CoCo2009]

Thanks you guys, I have tried everything and no matter what I do I just revert back into thinking about how I suck at life. How my ex dumped me because I wasn't good enough and I'm a loser and thats why he dumped me. I feel like I try to do things different and I can't I keep telling myself that I can but then I just feel like a loser and my stomach drops and all the bad things starts flowing in. How my ex hated me how he left me because I'm a miserable lame person. How he left me because I suck. It hurts so bad. I have never hurt like this before in my life. I can't even look for a job, I try to look for a job and then I just can't I get a weird feeling and I just sit on the couch and just start watchig tv I know things are going to get worse sO i JUST sit and watch tv. I feel so horrible. I used to keep all my bills paid and now I can't afford them so my credit is ruined my whole life is ruined. And my ex is gone, he's happy and he knows I'm a loser and it hurts so bad.

[onewithbooks]

It sounds like you are suffering from anxiety and depression. When you start to feel that way, get off the couch. Nothing will change if you are looking at the same four walls. Get the leash, get the dog, and go for a walk.

[CoCo2009]

I did that too, it doesn't help. I force myself to walk him and I do, it doesn't help. I want it to help I tried to stay out as long as possible but it just doesn't help. I wish and PRAY everyday. I wish that walking the dog made me feel better but it doesn't Everyone thinks I just like to complain that I like to throw a pity party that I'm not trying BUT I AM. I hate it when people tell me I'm not trying because I am . it makes me so angry.

[Ac143]

Go rent "Yes Man" - watch it & then live by his motto. LOL....Seriously - you need to change some things & not just not do anything. YOU are capable of doing anything you want, you need to be more positive & stop thinking horrible things about yourself. You are just bringing yourself down even more. Stop with the negativity & be more positive!!! On top of that, do things....anything. Walk your dog, look for a job, go to the gym (this really helps!) go home take a bath.

[CoCo2009]

I do try to think positive and then I think about how I made my relationship fail, I lost my job. I try to keep those thoughts about but they are true so I can't get away from them. They are like haunting me and just feel like crawling into a ball and dying, but I'm too scared to die, I'm scared of what will happen if I die. Where will I go if I die?

[hers]

the Yes Man motto is a good one. seriously, it just opens a world of possibilities if you live by it. (of course you don't have to go to the extremes he does in the movie, but it is helpful to have a motto like that)

[greywolf]

If you feel that you don't give enough attention to your dog, why don't you give him more attention? It sounds like you'd rather give up so that you can focus on how miserable you are instead of actually trying to get better. Honestly, you're not going to get better that way. It doesn't just happen by itself. It is actually a struggle, but if you really want happiness, you struggle through it.

[CoCo2009]

I just said I do try, and I don't want to get rid of him just so I can sit and be miserable. I shouldn't expect people who don't know me to understand. Its not your fault.

[onewithbooks]

Its not about trying, its about not giving up. Its about keeping going. A good friend once told me when you get to the point you cant do it any more, you fake it until you make it. It works.

[CoCo2009]

Well at this point I will just have to keep trying, I don't really have a choice.

[onewithbooks]

You can do this. One moment at a time. Look at all you have been through, and you are still here. That will help you get through the next minute and the minute after that. Soon you will have made through an entire day, and will be on to the next.

 

You can do it.

[CoCo2009]

How do I stop thinking about my ex and how much of a failure he thinks I am. How much of a miserable person he said I was. Its true. How he used to love me and how he saw how lame I was and then left?

[hers]

When we say you're sittign there wanting to stew in your misery, we don't mean you're making a conscious effort to be unhappy. We mean you're deciding to give up. Giving up your dog is making a decision to start giving up a small amount at a time. That's where choosing to be miserable is coming from though you don't see it that way (and that's ok). But you just can't give up. If you do, you're choosing to be unhappy.

[onewithbooks]

You start doing stuff that you can be proud of. You finish a project - paint something - something that you have been meaning to get around too and havent. You cant be a failure when you complete something.

[CoCo2009]

I don't think thats true because I try everyday and I do things everyday and then I go to sleep and I feel like I can't do it again the next day. I have been miserable for at least 1 year. he broke up with me last summer, then we got back together, he broke up with me again. i chased him let him back in and now he left me for good and it burns. I feel so stupid. so stupid that I let him do this to me, and he gets to walk away unphased when I kept letting him back in over and over. how could I be so stupid?

[onewithbooks]

have you taken any meds for anxiety and depression?

[CoCo2009]

When I had insurance I tried a generic Zoloft, but I got laid off so I had to stop taking it. I couldn't afford it anymore. I tried the St Jon Warts or whatever you call it but it doesn't work I guess.

[hers]

It's not that you were a bad person and that's why he left you. You just weren't meant to be. As soon as you stop blaming yourself, you can start to heal.

[NightLily]

I really think you should try working out in some minor way. It is so so hard to do when you can't pull yourself out of bed but promise yourself you will do it once. Walking outside counts. Dancing to music in your apartment counts. I can never tell what comes first, but I am definitely in a better mood when having some physical activity.

 

And honestly, in your case.. it doesn't sound like Zoloft would cut it. Maybe it would... but, you might need something a bit stronger and you have to understand the meds aren't a cure all. I would say the big benefit is that they give you that extra boost you need to function.. but they in themselves won't make you happy. Getting your life together will, and they can aid in that.

 

You might not just be having normal depression. Obviously you could be but there are other possibilites. There is such thing as unipolar which is sort of like bipolar but you only switch to one thing (either manic or depressed). Even if a situation triggered the "episode", it could still be chemical in nature. In fact, from my experience with what we will call potential Bipolar II, the phases are always triggered by something and pushed there. I just haven't handled it normally (but sometimes I wonder who would). Hence the problem.

[CoCo2009]

I do work out. I don't know what else to say.

[ramsickle1369]

Coco—

 

I think you are suffering from a broken heart more than anything…. Depression is a horrific feeling… You need to deal with the depression. When you pray, if you do not do something to make your prayers come true, you cannot get the answers you seek. Believe me, the last three years of my life have sucked royally. I got divorced, lost my house, lost a family member, spent countless hours in hospitals with other family members having heart attacks and the like. I have had something like 10 jobs over that time, been fired from about 1/3 of them. I have lost the love of my life and constantly feel like life isn’t worth living. I hate that I have to continue each day. I prayed my heart out, believed that the love I had in my heart was somehow making me have faith in a man’s total lies. I understand your plight. At the end of the day, I am still that insecure little 15 year old.

 

The point is that the ONLY time I feel better is when I involve myself in helping others in some way, charity, volunteering, helping a friend, etc. When I am done, the sadness and emptiness both return.

 

I have two cats, my mom has 7 dogs. I am not as busy as I need to be and there are lots of things I can do to get out of the house, but in the end, I still feel sad and empty. My cats show me love and I thank them all the time for being my companions when no one else will.

 

You are trying—I am sure you are. However, you have to keep going. Just believe that one day you will be the beautiful person you know is inside you. Don’t let anyone make you believe you are anything less, much less a crappy man!

 

BTW—a great pity party is the hardest thing to end. I have had some really great pity parties. I ONLY feel better when I accomplish something—clean the house, my closet, do my homework, help someone on ENA, etc. You are surely capable of many great things. Pick one that used to make you happy and stick with that till you feel the cloud lift a little.