Well this just sucks....

[gary1958]

So I got out of an abusive relationship 2 years ago. Took me 18 months to heal my self esteem and get my confidence back. So the last 6 months I have felt like yup, I could go out on a date and where are they all. Either I am not interested in them or vice versa. Or they live too far away. Maybe the fact Im 40ish has something to do with it but its very disheartening. Im pretty good looking and gets flirts and double takes at work and in public. But man, thought this would be easier.

[Duckie198100]

Don't be so hard on yourself. I personally find older men very, very attractive and I'm 30. You'll meet someone before you know it! Gotta keep trying!

[jet_palero]

So I got out of an abusive relationship 2 years ago. Took me 18 months to heal my self esteem and get my confidence back. So the last 6 months I have felt like yup, I could go out on a date and where are they all. Either I am not interested in them or vice versa. Or they live too far away. Maybe the fact Im 40ish has something to do with it but its very disheartening. Im pretty good looking and gets flirts and double takes at work and in public. But man, thought this would be easier.

 

be careful with online dating, its rare that it works out. if you're going to do it, only go for women who live near you and are willing to meet early on.

 

if you're decent looking at 40, there's going to be tons of women in your age bracket interested in you, the issue is meeting them. try taking up some new hobbies, or just some new hang outs.

[ghost69]

just gotta keep at it. i've been looking my whole life. still haven't found the one.

[beerman]

Gary1958 - we are in the same boat with the notable exception of the fact that you have your confidence intact. I tried the online thing for a while and that sucked the confidence right out of me. I am just now getting it back, but slowly.

 

Meeting women is really tough for me right now. I have a set of twins I am raising and I am very involved with them right now. I have joint custody. On the weeks I don't have them I am free to do as I please for the most part but I am at a loss of what to do with myself. I have no idea of where to go or what to do so I end up mad at myself that I choose to do nothing and expect something to happen. Obviously unrealistic.

 

So, I can relate, it is pretty tough out there. Hang in there! Things have to get better for the both of us!!!

[Scorpion Fury]

just keep your eye out. i think you will find her when you least expect it

[Umlunguusa]

I feel your pain. my ex was BPD, and has left me destroyed...I think however, I have BPD too, the only difference being, I can feel empathy for others, and don't destroy them on purpose--but sometimes, I just can't help it.