THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[lyla2013]

Day 4

 

Weekend is so difficult...

 

I kept myself busy since i got up this morning, having lunch with a girl friend, doing shopping.

But now, the moment when i open the door after arriving home, i crash down.

I am all alone in my empty apartment. Everything i see reminds me of him. I used to spend whole afternoon and evening talking with him.

Why couldn't it just last forever... Why it has to end like this...

 

"Before i met you, i was fine. Sinle, sure, but i was happy. And now that i've lost you, I feel lonely,

Lonely all the time."

 

I feel soooo lonely.....

[TheD87]

I will say I broke no contact a couple times with my last ex and avoided starting it again when she was calling me daily and it burned me and ended up making things WAY worse. I think being burned by avoiding NC has made it easier. Because I haven't even had the inclination to contact the new breakup that happened 5 days ago. I know nothing good is going to come of it.

 

I hope all you guys can get over it too, and I know almost all of you had way longer relationships you broke up with so it is harder, but you are doing the right thing. I wish you all the best of luck

[lyla2013]

Hi JS,

 

You're not alone. Let's get through it together.

I was also hoping that he would come back and explain everything, he did reply, but never explain things well.

A person who really loves us would always be there for us, would make our hearts feel safe and protected; he would never rip our hearts apart.

He just doesn't care.

 

We should focus on ourselves, to heal, improve, and become stronger hopefully.

[brokenhearted1]

Day 4

 

Weekend is so difficult...

 

I kept myself busy since i got up this morning, having lunch with a girl friend, doing shopping.

But now, the moment when i open the door after arriving home, i crash down.

I am all alone in my empty apartment. Everything i see reminds me of him. I used to spend whole afternoon and evening talking with him.

Why couldn't it just last forever... Why it has to end like this...

 

"Before i met you, i was fine. Sinle, sure, but i was happy. And now that i've lost you, I feel lonely,

Lonely all the time."

 

I feel soooo lonely.....

This is EXACTLY how I feel. Weekends and nights are the hardest for me...

[brokenhearted1]

Day 5....

 

I want to talk to him SO BAD...

 

I just keep telling myself...remember how he hurt you...remember how he made you feel. This is the same guy who abandoned you when you needed him most and you deserve better!

[brokenhearted1]

He posted on his FB (I need to stop reading those) that he's going on a road trip...I was suppose to go on that with him...fml.

[TheD87]

He posted on his FB (I need to stop reading those) that he's going on a road trip...I was suppose to go on that with him...fml.

 

Unfriend him on FB, or at least edit it so he doesn't show up in your news feed. Or else every time he updates his FB it is going to hurt the recovery process

[brokenhearted1]

Unfriend him on FB, or at least edit it so he doesn't show up in your news feed. Or else every time he updates his FB it is going to hurt the recovery process

If I block him from my newsfeed do you know if he will know that any way?

[TheD87]

If I block him from my newsfeed do you know if he will know that any way?

 

No, he will not know if you block his posts from your news feed. The most recent girl I broke up with for some reason wants to be friends with me on fb. The first time we stopped talking I de-friended her and she found out and re-added me by sending me another request a couple days later. We ended up getting back together and just broke up again. So this time I just removed her posts from my news feed, because it hurts me to see her posts, similar to what you said. But I don't want her knowing I removed her and her trying to re-add me again or what not. I have actually removed quite a bit of people from my news feed and I am almost certain they don't know, just like if you make them restricted.

[lyla2013]

Day 5

 

I keep myself busy today. He stills cross my mind all the time.

Every time, i remind myself that he has already moved on, he's probabaly chatting with other girls now.

This thought never fails to stab my heart like a sharp knife, so painful.

 

Wish him good luck in finding his right girl.

[brokenhearted1]

No, he will not know if you block his posts from your news feed. The most recent girl I broke up with for some reason wants to be friends with me on fb. The first time we stopped talking I de-friended her and she found out and re-added me by sending me another request a couple days later. We ended up getting back together and just broke up again. So this time I just removed her posts from my news feed, because it hurts me to see her posts, similar to what you said. But I don't want her knowing I removed her and her trying to re-add me again or what not. I have actually removed quite a bit of people from my news feed and I am almost certain they don't know, just like if you make them restricted.

Thank you, that is a great idea. I went on his page where it said friends, and I took the check mark off of follow posts..is that how I take him off of my news feed?

[emmlou]

Going to need some support through this as it's going to be tough! day 1 of proper no contact. Have deleted his number and sent him a ridiculous number of drunken texts last night when I found out he was talking to someone else. So embarrassed! I love him dearly and am hoping that NC will help me move and and let him see that I respect his space. I want him back but this month is about me me me

[js0905]

Hi Lyla,

 

You are doing good and we are doing it together like you said =)

Today will be day 7 for me and even though I know I'm not contacting him again inside of me lives hope.

Hope that he will reach out and fiz things. I wish that would go away since it's not helpful and my guy is on my mind a lot too.

 

I find myself also regretting things I said and wondering about stuff I did or didn't do.

However I read something the other day which I found helpful

 

"Regret is a powerful thing, it can weigh down hope and possibility.. Accept that what happened has happened and then move on"

 

Hang in there it will get easier....

[js0905]

I'm trying to edit this and is not working....

[js0905]

Day 5

 

I keep myself busy today. He stills cross my mind all the time.

Every time, i remind myself that he has already moved on, he's probably chatting with other girls now.

This thought never fails to stab my heart like a sharp knife, so painful.

 

Wish him good luck in finding his right girl.

 

 

 

Hi Lyla,

 

You are doing good and we are doing it together like you said =)

Today will be day 7 for me and even though I know I'm not contacting him again inside of me lives hope.

Hope that he will reach out and fiz things. I wish that would go away since it's not helpful and my guy is on my mind a lot too.

 

I find myself also regretting things I said and wondering about stuff I did or didn't do.

However I read something the other day which I found helpful

 

"Regret is a powerful thing, it can weigh down hope and possibility.. Accept that what happened has happened and then move on"

 

Hang in there it will get easier....

[emmlou]

It's not even been 24 hours yet and I'm struggling already. I was such an idiot yesterday and gave him so much grief. I apologised afterwords and before I deleted all ways of contacting him aside for running to his house but that wouldn't be a good idea! Trying to portray the non- crazy ex thing haha. Just wish I could apologise properly but he probably wouldn't listen anyway.

On Friday I will see him and there is no way of avoiding it as we have to get the same train. I'm not really sure how to approach it. I don't want to completely ignore him as that would be rude. I thought perhaps if I said hi as I walked past then sat as far away as possible. It will be so difficult to see him but I must show him I am in control of my emotions

[lyla2013]

Hi Lyla,

 

You are doing good and we are doing it together like you said =)

Today will be day 7 for me and even though I know I'm not contacting him again inside of me lives hope.

Hope that he will reach out and fiz things. I wish that would go away since it's not helpful and my guy is on my mind a lot too.

 

I find myself also regretting things I said and wondering about stuff I did or didn't do.

However I read something the other day which I found helpful

 

"Regret is a powerful thing, it can weigh down hope and possibility.. Accept that what happened has happened and then move on"

 

Hang in there it will get easier....

 

Thank you for sharing... I am also gradually accepting that what happened has happened.

 

I am grateful to a person on this site who helped me a lot by talking senses into me:

He told me that we all have worked through the memories over and over again, wondering about "what ifs" and "if onlys", but they won't solve anything, because it takes two to resolve a problem in a relationship. They know that we are suffering, but yet they didn't do anything to stop it. They don't care for our feelings.

He told me that if my ex didn't communicate in the past, he isn't going to start now either. He had all his chances, but he chose to throw them away.

He said, in fact, if we are honest with our memories, we would realise that things weren't that all peachy back then, there were red flags and warning signs which we have chosen to ignore, because we were blinded by our hearts.

He reminded me to ask myself "do you want to feel this way forever?" Even if he came back, would i truly be happy? Or would i be walking on eggshells and constantly fearing he'd do the same thing again?

 

Those words of his are really enlightening to me. I hope they will help you too.

 

I can't deny that i also still have a spark of hope inside of me, but it's getting dimmer and dimmer.

After all, i know that he's talking with some other girls now. I keep reminding me of this, although it's paintul.

 

"We deserve a man who won't fill us with confusion and pain."

 

This is Day 6 for me.

[brokenhearted1]

It's day 7...

 

I took a nap today, that felt nice because I haven't hardly slept at all.

 

But, when I woke up I was really missing him. I felt empty, lonely, and sad. I remember this one time I went out of time, and it was only for a short time, okay we didn't see each other for only 24 hours, but we missed each other. I remember when he walked into the restaurant I was meeting him at and we hugged each other soooooooo tight. The girl working there asked "have you two been away from each other for awhile?" I laughed and said ya a day!

 

We had a special connection that even other people noticed. I miss going out to lunch with him...I miss it so much.

[Janextacy]

Im new to this. I feel so lonely and emotionally destroyed. My ex boyfriend of 3 years decided to break up with me because he decided to go back with his ex girlfriend. This was something i didnt expect. They got back together and now she forbids him from calling/texting/seeing me. I miss him so much. I've contacted him a few times after the break up but he shows no interest. He does tell me he thinks about me. Im on day 2 with this NC rule. I miss him so much. Can someone tell me how this situation may end up?

[Janextacy]

Girl the same with me and my hunny. We were together for 3 years. We had an amazing relationship/bond that everyone loved and wished they had. One day he woke up told me he wanted to get back with his ex and left me

[emmlou]

I'm feeling exactly the same as you girls. We had such a connection that I just can't believe it is over. Everyone can't believe it because they saw how happy we were. So happy until the 2 days

[Janextacy]

Everyone was in shocked when he left me. Not so long ago he was telling ppl how much he loved me. Im so confused and torn. I dont know what else to seek. Im seeking for answers everywhere!

[emmlou]

My ex told a group of his friends and me the day before he left me that I was the one he was going to marry so we are all in shock. I understand why it happened as we were both unwell but I don't understand that!

[Janextacy]

Its been day 3 since NC. Is it normal to feel that he may have forgetten about me or doesn't care?

[lyla2013]

Its been day 3 since NC. Is it normal to feel that he may have forgetten about me or doesn't care?

 

It's day 7 for me. I also feel that he has already forgotten about me.

 

It's been only a week, but i feel like more than a month already. I feel that he has already gone far far away from me.

I am hesitating to leave the place that holds all our memories. Still hard to believe that he just left like that.

But i guess, this time it is for real. He's gone and will never come back any more...