lovebre Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 Day 13 Still in a content state of mind. Had class and treated myself to some shopping afterwards. Still thinking of my ex; wondering if he ever thinks of me. I actually ran into him today, he said hi as I was leaving from the library and I said hi back and I kept it moving. I had a nice discussion with my friends about current events in the news. Laughed and smiled a lot, and some guys definitely noticed my high spirits Definitely not ready to date again though. I'm not sure when I will be; but I'm being patient with myself. Link to comment
rhythm09 Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 Stumbled upon this thread after posting my recent break-up story and thought this is a nice goal to set myself. I love reading everyone's progress and applaud those who accomplished the 30+ days mark. I'm actually on Day 14 and can honestly say have been in NC. For the past week, I've been going to the mall, shopping sometimes, or just lounge in the bookstore and read books. I've been taken better care of myself and actually ran 3.5mi three days ago as my first work-out regime. Taking break now because my legs are still sore. I've been going up and down in my emotional train, but I kinda feel I'm doing better everyday. The one thing that bothers me is... My birthday is coming up real REAL soon and I'm curious to see what he'll do... And not sure how I should react if he does something. Link to comment
chrisbuilder Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 Day 25 Yet another day. Am thinking if I can turn this around, but keep on coming back to the fact that NC is the best for now, and that it has only been 25 days since our last contact. Keep on wondering if she is ever slipping further away, or that NC will give her time to reflect and eventually come back to me. Doubt doubt doubt Link to comment
flatplane Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 Day 10 NC and NIC for me. Really want to go and meet her for a today or pub garden today, but know it's not a good idea. Frustrating knowing she's probably not up to much and would jump at the chance. However she is with another so I have to be strong. May go and freeze my SIM card in the middle of an ice cube. Link to comment
lonelyheart2 Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 So...after that little embarrassing debaucle sent me a message on sunday saying sorry he couldn't stop and say hi? also hoping I have a good easter.....It was probably his most friendly message yet. Still though I'mmmmmm the one who kept moving after making my silly wave! Not that it matters...I guess he really doesn't think I saw him later on either...anyway I'm the same Rhythm09 my birthday is also coming up reeeeeeeally soon (It's actually on Easter day ) and I'm interested to see if he will do anything. Soo DAY 1 for me yet again! Link to comment
ladlapaglaa Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 So...after that little embarrassing debaucle sent me a message on sunday saying sorry he couldn't stop and say hi? also hoping I have a good easter.....It was probably his most friendly message yet. Still though I'mmmmmm the one who kept moving after making my silly wave! Not that it matters...I guess he really doesn't think I saw him later on either...anyway I'm the same Rhythm09 my birthday is also coming up reeeeeeeally soon (It's actually on Easter day ) and I'm interested to see if he will do anything. Soo DAY 1 for me yet again! hi lonelyheart, curious - did you ex initiate contact? how long did you wait? Link to comment
lonelyheart2 Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 Oh I don't know if you are familiar with my story? We've been broken up for quite a while now so that wasn't the first time he's broken contact or I've done something silly hahah This time it was because on friday I saw him on campus (he was quite far away) and I impulsively just shouted out to him whilst walking on to my lecture and waved hahaha I didn't even think! He did wave back as we are sort of on friendly terms, mostly since we bumped in to each other a week before and he drove me to the station. This last thing happened on friday and he sent his message Sunday evening...I can't say I was really waiting for anything because I didn't expect anything! I'm now wondering if I will hear from him on my birthday...I have huge doubts that anything will come of this but I can't get rid of the stupid hope! We've never been able to get past 40 days of no contact so maybe this time is the time... Link to comment
lonelyheart2 Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 O I've just realised do you mean right at the very beginning of our break up??? O he initiated contact...I told him I had to take him off facebook and everything about a week after the break up and said I wasn't doing it to hurt him then about 5 weeks later I can't really remember he sent one of those messages asking how I was. Evidently now 9 months on it doesn't mean anything! Link to comment
Rose Melody Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 Wow, lonelyheart, glad he reached out, even though it's a breadcrumb... Still, meeting you left some kind of impression that made him contact you. As for me... Day 13... I'm having a feeling you're doing great without me and that all of your bad feelings have passed... You've probably returned to your normal life, managing well without me. And I'm still hoping you'll knock on my door or maybe give me a call to say you miss me... And at the same time think it's a total science fiction in my brain. God, I hate all this torment. Link to comment
chrisbuilder Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 Does anybody here now why the hell we're NC'ing?? Is it just our little revenche? What do we seek to accomplish? I miss my gf like hell, and I know she doesn't deserve me because she dumped me, but what the hell is NC doing for me? We were so happy not too long ago, and somewhere along the way things got screwed up. But is NC doing for me? What are we trying to prove here? That we're stronger? Can anyone talk sense into me? I'm struggling not to pick up the phone and dial her number... Link to comment
Reilly2856 Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Does anybody here now why the hell we're NC'ing?? Is it just our little revenche? What do we seek to accomplish? I miss my gf like hell, and I know she doesn't deserve me because she dumped me, but what the hell is NC doing for me? We were so happy not too long ago, and somewhere along the way things got screwed up. But is NC doing for me? What are we trying to prove here? That we're stronger? Can anyone talk sense into me? I'm struggling not to pick up the phone and dial her number... NC is nothing more than one accepting that it is OVER and moving on WITHOUT him/her. It isn't about trying to prove anything to anyone. It is merely accepting the situation...accepting that the relationship ended. In your case, she dumped you. So, how will keeping in touch with her achieve anything? It will only prolong the hurt...if she dumped you, hanging around her...calling her...isn't going to make her change her mind. It will do nothing. She made the decision to end it...and now it is time to accept it on your part. That is the easier route to take than to continue being in her life (i.e., whether as a friend)....hoping she will change her mind...only to find out later that she met with someone else. You will be strung along for months only to end up at the same place you are here (i.e., OUT OF HER LIFE). BY going NC now, you get to move on earlier with your dignity intact. 1 Link to comment
MichaelD Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 I'm doing it because she needs it. And Im doing it because I need it. Even though I have thoroughly convinced myself (however ill-fated it may be) that she will come back, and it will ultimately be MY decision whether or not I want to try again, if she never reaches out again I will be better for this time. Every time I even looked at her friend's Facebook site I was sent deeper into despair. Not contacting her is helping me move on in the likely event that we never reconcile. DAY 8 NIC DAY 1 NC Link to comment
hopeful21 Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 NC is so damn hard....I went through my first break up this year. We've had NC for 6 months. It wasnt even really a real breakup, but he made it seem like one. The first month was definitely the most painful. Now it still makes me feel empty....all i wanna do is talk to him. Idk how to do it though...and he lives 10 feet accross the hall from me... Link to comment
lovebre Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Day 14 Still missing my ex, but not as much as before. Still in a content mood. Not really feeling extreme sadness or anger, & I'm glad. Didn't see him today and was pretty bummed about it. Although I won't speak to him, I enjoy looking at him Lol Link to comment
Rose Melody Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Two weeks of NC are behind me... Two weeks more to go until we see eachother. I'm dreading that day, at least to say... Link to comment
lonelyheart2 Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 DAY 2 -I wish you hadn't bothered to send me that message then I would be counting myself as on day 15! I miss spending time with you, looking forward to seeing you, I know I shouldn't care but I just keep wondering if you ever think about it, what we used to be and if you even miss it...which is silly because of course you don't as otherwise you wouldn't be able to not talk to me. Plus it's been ages......I don't know why I've made it ok for us to be 'friends' I've just made it harder on myself. Link to comment
MichaelD Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Day 2 NC Day 9 NIC The fact that you wrote to say you are still alone working things out in your brain, but still want to talk eventually, and then said how really really really really sorry you were made not contacting you so easy - for one day. At first I felt I had finally some dignity and power again - i responded politely to the first saying space and time was good for both of us, and I didn't respond to your profusive apology, which I took only as you feeling guilty. Now it's been 2 days, and now that I know you're at least thinking of me in some way, and haven't rebounded over to the OG, it's becoming so hard to wait for you to get back to me. Are you having second thoughts or just feeling guilty? Did my non-response come accross as cold and angry? Would that stop you from contacting me again? I know that it won't stop you - that if you decide you want this again then nothing I haven't done will stop you. If me leaving you alone for another few weeks will cause you to get over me, then I know it wouldn't have been worth saving... But still, I want you to know that I forgive you. I understand what happened. I still want you back... Link to comment
Lightning87 Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 I accept your challenge and it starts from today. Link to comment
chrisbuilder Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 Thanks, I needed the reminder. Day 26 Just checking in. Worked out. It's time to change. Hate the guy who was so needy she gagged and got rid of me. Now I need to get rid of that guy too. He's history. Time to grow a pair. Link to comment
No Contact 6x Posted March 28, 2012 Share Posted March 28, 2012 today is day 14 of no contact . SEeking strenght to make it to 60 (May 15 2012) Link to comment
einsteins_girl Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Today is Day 70 of NC, and this strange thing is starting to happen... I'm starting to heal. I feel it in little moments. It's sort of a lightness, a feeling of relief, a release of the burden of being sad. I think I've trained my brain by now to think obsessively about you when it has the chance, but this evening, I started to think those usual thoughts, "How could someone call someone they love useless and never apologize? How could someone just give up and leave after six years and never look back?" and I suddenly realized - no, I suddenly felt - that the answers didn't matter. You did call me useless. You may never apologize. You left, and you're probably never coming back... and it doesn't matter. With that thought, I stopped obsessing about why you did it or why you do anything, really. I know this is just the beginning, and I know I'll relapse into despair again more than once, but the past few days, I think I've really started to feel like I'll be okay. I'll be okay. Link to comment
lovebre Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Day 15 A mixture of contentment and sadness could describe today.I didn't see my ex, which is a good thing but I miss him. I went to a passion party today (Google it) and got a lot of laughs at that. Not much else to say.... Link to comment
chrisbuilder Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Sounds like you made it to the other side! Congratulations! I also like the way you express it...it's what we're all waiting for to happen... Link to comment
chrisbuilder Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Day 27 Have this suspicion she's already with someone else, who she met when we were still together. They had gone out three nights in a row together with a married guy, and I remember being very careful not to say anything about it and just be casual (we were in a LDR), because I supposedly had a trust issue...would find it extremely ironic if my gut feeling had been right all along. Ex boyfriend is always the last to find out about these things, when so-called friends are trying to soften the blow. Wish I could just call and ask, but then I'd probably get an angry denial and a slammed phone - so far for not playing games. Link to comment
flatplane Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Day 13 of NC and NIC for me! Had a great day yesterday after a * * * * ty day on Tuesday. Working in a new place with new people, and bumped into an old friend when shopping. Link to comment
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