THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[VictorVic]

Day 7

 

Yesterday was a miserable day but I woke up feeling a little better today. I deep down think things will work out between me and her....If you told me a week ago I could go one full week without talking to her I would call you crazy.

[kennyc90]

Day 38

 

I'm dead tired and I'm so ready to go to sleep. I just hope tomorrow turns out to be an ok day at best. I'm glad I'm off duty.

[nessa7139]

Day 5

 

I received a text message this morning asking if he could take our daughter out on Sunday to which i've agreed.

So on Sunday I will have to see him......

I also told him that if I find out his new woman is there it will be his last time of taking her out and he will see her in my house... Was that wrong????

 

Anyway he keeps denying there is someone else I keep calling him a liar and we're going backwards and forwards with this.

 

Any suggestions on what to do please??

[avman]

if I find out his new woman is there it will be his last time of taking her out and he will see her in my house

 

Does this woman actually present some sort of danger to your child that you would require supervised visitation?

[longtripalone]

Day 5

 

Just getting through the days now. 5 days feels like eternity. I don't understand, we've gone a long time without talking before. For some reason I guess it just feels like it's been a long time because this time it feels like the final nail in the coffin.

 

-Heather

[hawkster]

Day 3,

 

Yesterday i broke NC with her. One of our mutual friends was having a problem with her Boyfriend so we had a short exchange on how she wanted me to talk to her about it. I told, her that i will try my best but i have to go(re initiating NC). Also for the past 3 days i have been sick to my stomach. I am too worried about being her friend right now and that it is getting in the way of my schoolwork and personal life. This will be the hardest few months(i am expecting a few months of NC) i have ever endured so far in my short life.

[perio]

Same ol, same ol.

[josephine89]

Day 2

Had a massive day at work and it was so stressful I didn't get a chance to think about him. I saw his friends in the street today and had a stop and chat. I was trying to avoid them but they spot me first and walked over. It was nice and they were polite. They told me he is going away on tour with his band for a few days to Perth (about a 3 hour plane ride). I have the urge to text him and say "Have fun in Perth!!" but I won't.

I'm taking 30NC seriously.

[brandon5359]

Day 13.

I thought about her quite a bit today. I am glad I didn't break NC on Tuesday like I thought I would. I still have an itch to. I know I will break it at some point but I need to give myself more time because I'm not quite sure how much it would set me back. I still have a gut feeling that she is missing me by some of her facebook status updates. I am giving myself another 5 days and may break it on Tuesday. Who knows. I have to throw my line in the water at some point and see if she just nibbles or swallows the whole hook.

[perio]

Brandon

I sent you a brief PM

[hawkster]

Day 4,

 

I just woke up, and I can't stop thinking about her. I can't stop thinking about the fun that we've had and that now its possible shell be having that fun with another guy. It hurts Mornings are by far the worst...

[beancounter999]

Day 10

 

Still think about him every minute of every day. Can't wait for the day that he's not the first thing I think of when I wake up in the morning and the last thing I think of when I fall to sleep at night...

[Starrgrl]

Day 5. Not as hard this time round as I did 117 days of NC =( before breaking it.

This time I'm resigned, and I've accepted that no matter how much I care about him, he can't be in my life, bc he's not right for me.

 

Going to keep NC for as long as possible.

[perio]

Still think about him every minute of every day

 

Hey beancouter

 

Would ou let us know when you catch yourself not thinking about him? I know it may sound silly. I understand your consumed at this point. I guess what I am trying to say that it gets better and I am looking forward to the day you tell us that only a portion of your day was spent thinking of him. Hang in there

[kennyc90]

Day 39

 

I forgot to post yesterday because a buddy of mine was over last night. He actually makes things better for me and help me keep my mind off my ex. He's a workout enthusiast and is part the reason for my success on my physical fitness goals. I'll post later tonight again. I hope I have a great weekend and so does everyone else!

[justpeachy]

I don't know if I'm ready for this, but here goes nothing. Day 1 of no contact starts tomorrow morning.

[Ryankeith]

I am now seriously contemplating this. I find it incredibly difficult because I want to get over the terrible hurt/pain I am going through, but at the same time I don't want to get over her because I am still deeply in love. Please help.

[kennyc90]

Day 40

 

I posted earlier today because I forgot to post last night. Well I'm probably not going to bed anytime soon since I have company around, but I just want to let this post out before I forget again. I noticed that when I have company around, I hardly ever think about my ex. It's funny because the people I've been kickin' it with lately, we all have the same things in common. We like working out and we always talk about who's hot at work and just general guy talk to pass the time. I mean it's alright I guess... makes me think about my ex less.

[nessa7139]

Day 7

 

I forgot to post yesterday as I was busy meeting with my Sister who I haven't spoken to in 10 months, however, on day 5 he contacted me about our daughter, but since then nothing, so I guess my NC mission is still going strong!!!

I thanked him for letting me go when we text (day 5) and I feel so much better for doing so.... I of course still love him deeply and we have shared so much together but I am getting my head around the fact that he is not right for me...

I will (unfortunately) always have to have a certain amount of contact with him, but I think I am now ready to except and move on without him.

[nessa7139]

I agree hawkster......... Mornings are the worst

[piruru]

Okay. I'm officially taking on this one. Good luck to me, I guess. Sorry if I'm doing this wrong.

 

Background info: Ex-bf broke up with me on Wednesday, December 1st, 2010. He said we were incompatible. Apparently I was an emotionally and verbally abusive girlfriend and I did a lot of small things that, in hindsight, were kind of awful. I also slapped him when he broke up with me (I'm not proud of this, but I was really raging because he couldn't hear me anymore and flat out refused to fix anything with me). He called me crazy after that. He wasn't the best boyfriend either and my needs were not met, which was why I ended up looking like a crazy abusive person to this guy who didn't even like me that much. I didn't contact him until the Saturday after, during which he was driving and he said he'd call me back. Surprise, surprise - he didn't. I shamelessly called him back on Sunday night asking to be friends, and he kept things short and simple. He said he was okay with meeting up sometimes and that we could be friends. I continued not to contact him until yesterday, because I knew he had an exam. I texted him in the morning wishing him luck. No reply. I call him after his exam time and asked him how it went, "It was alright." I ask to catch up and ask again if I'm still a friend. He says something to the tone of "yeah" and that he was busy tonight to go out drinking with his friends and that he'll "be there for a while." It seems funny, because he never met these "friends" throughout our relationship and I was never introduced to them either, yet he was all upset that I wasn't introducing him to my friends. Anyhow, he agrees to call and meet up sometime, when he "has time." This essentially means close to never, because the lack of time was always an issue in our relationship. After all of this and some being upset/angry about it, I have decided to finally go strict NC. For my own well being. I still want to be friends somewhere down the track, if he gives a damn. I know for certain that he is moving overseas sometime in the next couple of months, so if he decides never to contact me again, that is fine by me. A shame, though. Funny how he can be "friends" with his ex and will answer her drunken calls and "I love yous", yet I call him once or twice and he gets really annoyed? Guess I was always just a rebound.

 

Day 1

It's still the early hours of Day 1, but I have officially deleted his number from my phone (again). That said, I still have it committed to memory so this is going to be fairly difficult, but I'm prepared to stick it out for my own sake. I have thrown out all the things that remind me of him that I don't want to use. There are a few clothes that he has given me that I've decided to keep because I like them. He also painted a picture of me which I absolutely adore so I cannot throw that out either. Other than that, I've rearranged my room, my living room and changed my bed linen so I don't get reminded of him every time I go to sleep. I still have to rearrange my wardrobe again so I don't think of him every time I open it. I have one last packet of cigarettes that reminds me of him... I don't know whether I will smoke them or quit straight away. I started smoking because he used to smoke anyway, so it's got a big connection with him. I don't want him in my headspace anymore. I don't want to think about him anymore... it only makes me feel sad. I've spent enough time being sad and feeling ugly. I've had enough and I'm really exhausted. I haven't been able to sleep easily ever since we broke up. I haven't eaten well either. I've already lost some weight from the whole ordeal. It's time to look after myself and be the best that I can be. The person I was before I met him. It's so weird that he liked me then because although I was myself, I was completely in love with someone else. Once I starting loving/caring/devoting myself to him, he called it quits. Interesting. A mistake I'm not going to make again.

 

Today I have exams to study for and people to help. My mum is moving house, so I am going to help her. I miss my ex-bf a lot, but have realised that he doesn't care. AT ALL. All those memories, hopes, fun plans and beautiful dreams we had together are all going to be metaphorically thrown out now. Here's to hoping that 30-day NC will make me better.

 

Will check in again at the end of the day to make sure I have not let myself down and have kept NC. I guess it's going to be a daily battle.

[beancounter999]

Piruru - glad you're taking the challenge. You deserve so much better! Take the 30 days and focus on you. NC is the best way to heal. If you're ever tempted then jump on ENA and post...we're all here for you.

[piruru]

Thanks for saying that, beancounter999!! I need all the support I can get. So glad I found this place

[josephine89]

Hey Piruru good luck. You will feel better, day 1 is hard. It's good that your helping your mum move and keeping yourself busy. I'm glad I found this place too.

 

[josephine89]

Day 5

I went out the weekend and had a "big night". I never really go out and RARELY get drunk. I went to a big party in town with some friends but they bailed early and went home to there boyfriends houses. I decided to stay out because I'd made some new friends but to be honest I was bored and didn't feel like anyone was vaguely interested in talking to me. I tried my best to socialise and be confident but it was like I was invisible. I'm 21 years old and I don't know how to party...

I really badly wanted to text him when I was about to fall asleep at 3am. I woke this morning with my phone open and a message ABOUT to be sent. Lucky I fell asleep.

Why the hell do I keep thinking in the back of my head we're going to get back together? He was a jerk and I know he'll never change but I still stupidly love him.

End of rant for today...