THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[EFromm33]

Day 13

 

Today's been the worst day since HE broke NC to email me last weekend (I didn't respond), but I think it's probably because I saw his dad yesterday and he kept telling me stories about his son/my ex. He's a really nice guy and has always been lovely to me but...yikes.

[kennyc90]

Day 1

 

Suppose to be day 11 for me, but I broke NC today. My ex texted me a friendly late happy birthday. I just replied back " thank you" and nothing more. I will continue to go NC until I know exactly what she wants. I didn't expect to get a text from her at all. It made me excited to get a text from her because I still want to be with her, but I know I have to play this cool and not make the same mistakes I did before. I now have the ball on my side. I know I can pull this off if I'm patient and think with my mind, not my heart, this time around.

[brandnewday47]

Day 42... six weeks, even after this long, I feel that the 60 - 90 day range is the timeframe I need.

[Irishguy1125]

Day 13 of NC, things have been good, staying busy with work and friends, either going to a house party or a club tonight so that will be exciting, still miss her, the cute way she said "hi" to me on the phone, the warmth of holding her hands, the look she gave me right before we kiss, I can't believe it's been 13 days but I think it's been good, she didn't know how she felt about me, I am not going to be there day in and day out to ween her off me, cold turkey is going to give her our supposed "break" and maybe she will know how she finally feels when I see her in two weeks.

[heartbroken14]

day 27 NC - Day 28 post BU

 

Still the same. Still think of him often and wonder if he thinks of me. i miss him in my life. I am trying to keep myself busy and actually agreed to go to a ballgame tonight with a friend and a couple of guys. No date, just to have fun. She says it will do me some good to interact with other guys. So i guess we will see.

[sillytimes]

Would you believe it? One day and I BREAK! I suck! I saw him the other day (we are on a 'break'- won't see him for a month as he is away and we aren't really meant to be contacting in that time). What do I send? A text saying, 'I'm sad, hows you?' (he told me the other day that he is just really, really sad and he misses me BUT it isn't enough as we had the same reoccurring problem of which I was 80% responsible). Then I ring him about five minutes after convinced it is ok just to have a chat- no reply. Then I wise up and twenty minutes after the originial text I send one saying, 'I shouldn't have contacted you- sorry.'

 

I know I shouldn't contact him, it is the only chance we have of a reconciliation, so please everyone help me through it! I read on someone's post that contacting your ex is just giving them your connection it is not really connecting with them so what is the point????

 

Right tomorrow I will not contact him. I will complete the 30 NC challenge!

 

I will!

[Irishguy1125]

It's okay, we all slip up sometimes. Best of luck to you in your endeavor. "Breaks" suck!

[vertigoxo]

Day 4

 

Getting a little better. I just have to learn to not get stuck in that deep thinking mode... It's making me sad. :S

[kennyc90]

Day 2

 

After work, I went to the mall today with my friends today. I thought about her here and there. After I went to the mall, I stayed at my friends apartment for a little while. I thought about her a lot. Then I started watching youtube videos and took my mind off of her. Now I'm writing this before I go to sleep. When I think about her, it's mostly due to the fact that I keep on wondering if she's with someone right now. I have absolutely no idea and I have a good feeling she still is talking to her rebound. I'm playing it cool right now and I won't initiate any contact with her. I have a good feeling that she will try to contact me again but I'm trying to not expect it and keep my mind off of her.

[Irishguy1125]

Day 14, wow, two weeks. Been staying busy, went to a friends musical then went to a house party, I hate going to parties without her though, I used to just drink a little hangout with her then drive her back or whatever, now I go to these parties as a single man and I am not interested in any of the girls beyond a superficial level and nothing good ever comes from it, I can't imagine dating anyone new right now, I just hope this all works out.

[scotsguy]

Day 0

 

Time for me to take up the challenge for real now. I saw my ex tonight for the first time in 10 weeks, we had to sort out some of my things that she still has. Anyway she took the opportunity to tell me everything that's going on in her life, even though I asked her not to. In the 5 months since we broke up, she's moved in with her new man, is planning to go travelling with him in a couple of years (something we were going to do) and the two of them want to move to Australia one day. I tried to act like I didn't care - but she knows me too well.

 

I just can't believe that she's moved on and set up a new life for herself so quickly. We were in a relationship for 4 years and lived together for 2 of those. I wondered if she was going to drop some big news on me so I guess now I know what. She cried when she first saw me tonight, and again when she was leaving. That makes this even more difficult.

 

Honestly my head doesn't want her back now. She's hurt me too much. But my heart does, which is why I'm posting in the GBT forum. I want to go cold NC now. I know I'm not getting her back (at least any time soon). It's time for me to move on, let go of all the hope I've been holding on. I want to get to the point where I no longer want her back.

 

I just want to get all the thoughts out of my head. She's literally just left 20 minutes ago and I feel so confused and emotional

[vertigoxo]

Day 5

 

So it's confirmed. I'll be moving to Texas real soon.

 

I'm sorry you couldn't see what was in front of you, Chris. Good luck finding a girl as great as I am. Till then, I'm eating amazing steaks and doing peoples hair for life.

[mistrall]

day 45, have found my path x

[kennyc90]

Day 3

 

After I went to work today, I went to a picnic and had lots of fun. After that, I went to a dance studio and practiced choreography for 3 hours. Then I came back to my apartment and just watched youtube videos. I'm also trying to get to know this one girl I met on facebook and she doesn't live too far away. I wanna be able to hang out with her soon. I thought about my ex a lot today, I won't lie. Whenever I think about her, I always think if she's with her rebound and what they're doing. It sometimes drives me nuts because I have no way of knowing anything at all. Other than that, my day went fine.

[Irishguy1125]

it's been 15 days, jeez, it has felt like a lifetime, i feel worse this morning than I have in a while, dreamed about her last night, woke up thinking about her this morning, I have this fear as though she has just forgotten about me even though it has only been 15 days, zero contact after we talked every single day for the past 5-6 months. I miss her cute southern accent, her playing with my hair while we watched movies, ugh, i can't wait to see her in 12 days but what do I even say to her when that happens??? ugh.

[Scotty123]

Day 10

 

My kids have just arranged to go for a sleepover tonight so I will be alone tonight ! That never happens so I may just see what it is for my ex to be all alone. Hmm I hope I make it through the night without doing anything silly like contact her !!

[FrostPanther425]

Day 0

 

So it's back to day one for me. For the first time ever she told me she was too weak to do it and asked me to. She thinks that it would be for the best if we just stopped talking altogether. I do not know how I will last. Everything I did was so horrible and just yesterday she wanted to say she was coming back. Just last night we told each other all the reasons we wanted to be together. This morning she just told me that after writing it all out and stuff, I needed to leave her alone. I will. I am doing the 30 day challenge not because I want to consider contacting her at the end, not because I think it will make her want to come back or miss me. I am doing it because right now I need a better goal in this. I am doing it because I need something to keep me strong.

 

The longest we have not talked to each other in 2.5 years together was 9 days. For now that has to be my goal.

 

I guess this is a way to better yourself and I now have a job starting next week. I am trying to figure a lot of stuff out and it will take time. I think it's almost ironic that she told me not having a job was a huge reason and I got one literally minutes after getting off the phone.

[redreine]

I used to post in the original version of this thread a looooong time ago, and I thought I would come in and tell everyone my story.

 

The ex I was supposed to be taking this challenge over, kept asking me back, and I kept taking him back. We did this 8 times. EIGHT TIMES. Then, he ended contact with me, and I moved on.

 

I was with this new guy for almost a year. It was not a good relationship emotionally, and it ended tragically. However, a few months into the relationship, my old ex made contact. I ignored him for awhile, then finally decided to just be friends with him. We ended up becoming really good friends. Then my new boyfriend and I broke up, and my ex was engaged.

 

Fast forward 3 months, and the original ex and I are back together. He did a complete 180, and has become the perfect boyfriend. We're looking at a house, and planning our wedding.

 

Now there is another problem. Somewhere along the line, I fell out of love with him, and now I've met someone else. I'm caught in between the two guys.

 

I think what I'm trying to say is, don't sit around and wait for your ex. Move on, and find happiness with someone else. Not only that, but once you do move on, do it 100%, and never look back, no matter what.

[everybodyknows]

day 13. i can do this.

[scotsguy]

Day 1

 

Wow today was difficult. I was at home on my own all day, not a good idea I know. Plenty of time to wonder what she's doing and go over everything again in my head. The worst part is waking up early in the morning and she's the first thing that I think of. I watched a couple of films and some TV shows to try and take my mind off it. Comedy helps I feel a bit better now than I did earlier. No urge to break NC - what's the point?

[vertigoxo]

Day 6

 

So it's NOT confirmed 100% that we're moving to Texas. Jesus, I hate this. Well, I'm happy to say I almost made a week without contacting him.

 

It gets easier, everyone!

[ceallach]

Day 7

 

I am definitely getting better everyday. I'm going swimming, which I love, and eating healthily. I've finally got my appetite back, and after losing loads of weight, I'm determined to keep it off. I don't have any urge to contact him at all. He told his sister he wanted to meet up with me to say goodbye! But she told him i don't want to see him. And i really don't. I miss him so much and would love to have him back, but the damage has been done and it will never be the same. I'm slowly learning to cope being by myself. Mornings used to be tough but they're ok now. It's the evenings when the feeling of loneliness sets in. But i'm getting used to it, slowly but surely.

[FrostPanther425]

So this is still day 0 for me. I don't understand this. She tells me she wants me out of her life, she tells me to cut off contact so she can get better. I accept, since I need NC to get better myself. Then she proceeds to contacting me over and over and over for 4 hours. Everyone here knows how difficult it is to ignore the ex calling.

 

Eventually I break down and answer a call, just so I can put her mind at ease. I tell her I need some time to figure this out, I tell her I need time to get used to knowing she was cheating when we first met and a few times after. Then she starts blaming me saying I never wanted this and I hate her. I don't hate her, I took the call to keep from hurting her more. How can someone be so selfish and not give someone some time to work through things? I basically told her I am coming back at some point, I just don't know how long it will take. I am sure she will call in the next few days accusing me of taking time to sleep around to get over her, when I just need some time to feel better about myself. Anyone else here have this issue?

[kennyc90]

Day 4

 

Today I was suppose to go to Los Angeles with a few of my friends but they screwed me so I had to stay in San Diego and not having anything to do!! I was pretty upset. I ended up working out and practicing dance at a nearby studio. I was on facebook today most of the time because I didn't have much to do since my plans totally got diminished. I kept on thinking about my ex again and I started to miss her REALLY BAD which is not good. I almost started to freak out so I decided I needed to go out and do something rather than just stay in my room and think about my ex all day. I went out for a little bit and came home kind of late. I had a buddy from work come over tonight and we just talked about work and other casual stuff. It kept my mind off my ex. Now I'm computer shopping at almost 3 in the morning as we speak lol. My day has been ok at best. I could have been having a great time in Los Angeles though.

[kennyc90]

Day 7

 

I am definitely getting better everyday. I'm going swimming, which I love, and eating healthily. I've finally got my appetite back, and after losing loads of weight, I'm determined to keep it off. I don't have any urge to contact him at all. He told his sister he wanted to meet up with me to say goodbye! But she told him i don't want to see him. And i really don't. I miss him so much and would love to have him back, but the damage has been done and it will never be the same. I'm slowly learning to cope being by myself. Mornings used to be tough but they're ok now. It's the evenings when the feeling of loneliness sets in. But i'm getting used to it, slowly but surely.

It's good to hear that you're getting better!