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30 years old, hate my job, cant get a new one, I have a ton of debt and the love of my life left me.

AlwayzRight

By AlwayzRight
in Personal Growth

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trixiebabe64 Rookie

trixiebabe64

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I know how you feel! Debt can make you completely overwhelmed and also can make you feel like not getting out of bed. As for the job, I don't even have one! I wish I did, but i'm picky and in this economy there isn't many that are good. Working nights totally sucks, I did that for a while and it drained me. As for the girl, she must not have been the right one. The right girl will come along. I also think bankruptcy may be a good option, why not start over while everyone is. A clean slate would be a good place to start, and everything else will fall into place. Keep your head up, and keep moving!

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AlwayzRight Enthusiast

AlwayzRight

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So how many headhunters did you go visit? How many buildings did you walk into in your town and ask to fill out an application, since you're off work all day long? Are you on linkedin and do you spend at least an hour every single day on linkedin searching for contacts? How many workfairs have you attended? Have you offered to intern for free somewhere during the day to segue into a new job?

 

 

Lets just put it this way. If there was a job in my area making any comparable income that I was remotely qualified for I have applied for it. all the experience I have had with headhunters has been worthless.

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Siriana Mentor

Siriana

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Don't get offended but I think you have too much debt that was not necessary to begin with. Student loan is o.k. but building a credit card debt and on top of that buying a car on a loan was unwise. I think you need to inform yourself in detail how to manage your finances and what are your options /ways of reducing debt to the level you can handle. Until you do that your chances of finding a daily job that can pay your bills are slim.

My first idea is to get rid of the car and to think about whether you need that car at all. Maybe you could simply relocate closer to work (no matter are we talking about this particular job or some other you might find in the future). The thing many people don't think about when it comes to cars is how on top of monthly payments you have insurance, maintenance costs and gas costs. It's a lot of additional cost that usually ends up on your credit card. So with all that taken into account it gets cheaper renting a car for holiday or when you really need it, than owning one. If you can't live without a car, try to get rid of the one you have and buy something cheaper. 19 k is a lot of money for a car, and probably you don't need such a car.

Next thing, try to see if you can get better conditions for your credit card debt. I'm not in States so I am not familiar how it goes there, but several things are coming to my mind - you can threaten them that you'll switch to another credit card company. Also, if you get rid of the car debt you might be able to take a loan with lesser interest rate to pay off credit card debt.

Also see if you can reprogram your student debt.

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turnera Newbie

turnera

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Unexpected expenses that were out of my control is the reason why.

 

So your budget addresses cutting all unnecessary expenses and paying off one debt at a time? There is one bill in your budget that you're putting all extra income toward while you pay the minimum on everything else?

 

Are you preparing from scratch and eating all your meals at home?

 

Are you selling anything you don't need on ebay and applying that money to the one bill you're trying to pay off while you pay minimum on all other bills?

 

Have you cut off your cell phone? Internet? Cable? These are all unnecessary expenses and you can use that money to pay down one of your bills.

 

Are you working at McDonalds 4 hours a day, since you're home all day and see no one, and putting that extra income toward one of your bills?

 

These are the kinds of things that should be in your budget if you are that much in debt.

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hexaemeron Collaborator

hexaemeron

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Yeah, I have to agree. OP, it's understandable that this is a daunting situation for you, as it is for all of us. But things just aren't magically going to get better on their own. You won't wake up one day and everything's perfect.

 

You have to take the initiative and learn how money and credit work. You need to learn how to establish a budget, put money in savings, put money away for retirement, pay down your bills on time and still have a little money left over for yourself.

 

You need to learn to live within your means. This is the hardest part of establishing a budget. And unexpecting things will happen and you'll need to put your hands on some money. That's where savings comes in, so you're not kicked in the teeth when s**t goes down.

 

You have the power and the tools to redesign your whole life to your satisfaction. You just have to be brave enough, and resolute enough to see it through. Are you?

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  • 2 years later...
Romeog99 Newbie

Romeog99

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hey! i searched this thread via google. I just turned 30 and may have the same concern regarding my job. what happened to you? were you able to pay your debt after you last post? (2 years) did you get a better job? new gf?

 

if you did succeed what did you do?

 

Thanks!

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Dynaudio Rookie

Dynaudio

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Reviving old threads...nothing wrong with dusting the cobwebs off, I guess.

 

I was flipping through this, seeing advice given to the op to not date while in debt. Let me say, that's damn awful advice. When you've got a debt that's likely to take a decade or more to payoff, you don't just become a celibate monk during that time. That would make anyone want to smash their face against a wall repeatedly. But yes, I do agree, you have to make changes to your habits. You really can have a wonderful loving relationship without spending much money. You just have to find a partner that's on the same page about that. So you'll have to scratch materialistic people off the list. Find someone that enjoys a hike, tossing a frisbee, watching Netflix at home, or just good long sex sessions. Those things don't require much money.

 

And by all means, put your energy and focus on the positive things in your life. Just because you have debt doesn't mean you have to put all your mental focus on it. Work with creditors to get a payment plan you can afford. If that doesn't work, file bankruptcy. If you can't discharge certain things in bankruptcy, move to South America or Europe. But whatever you do, don't just sit there shooting down suggestions everyone gives you. Instead, sit there thinking up more possibilities. If you can't do that, you're already doomed.

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blueidealist24 Collaborator

blueidealist24

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Why don't you take a job during the day, even if it's lower paying? You'll still be able to pay off your debt, maybe not as fast but is paying off your debt quicker really worth it if it's making you feel that bad? Most people have some sort of debt at some point in their lives. It's not like you're Satan for being in debt, it seems like you feel like you are. And for people who say he shouldn't date when he's in debt, if that rule applied to everyone, half the people on this planet wouldn't be dating for like twenty years.

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