I so scared him away LOL!

[Konfetkette]

This new guy from match.... I think I scared him away because I said that eduction is my first priority It's been days since his email! Could be due to hurricane or whatever but I am a pessimist I think it's kind of funny though. Maybe not the best thing to say to someone before you two are actually dating... Haaha whatever. Opinions?

[annie24]

so what? then he's just the wrong man for you. education is an important priority, you're paying enough for it! maybe he felt self-conscious because he only finished high school? or maybe he's dead. doesn't matter. NEXT!!!

[Batya33]

I think that's the kind of thing that's fine to say. There are certain "TMI" categories I wouldn't bring up in a profile, but that's not one of them. Or, maybe he's just busy with school, lol.

[Konfetkette]

annie he's in college I only posted this so I can share. I don't really care about finding a bf right now. I am too busy with school.

 

Batya, maybe he is I'll see if he replies.

 

Another funny: this guy whose name I forgot to ask emailed me after I gave him my email. So I go: um hey *insert name here* I can't believe I didn't ask your name before...but what is your name on match?

 

Hah his email slowed down considerably since then . I am so unlucky I have to start meeting people in RL.

[Batya33]

Why are you e-mailing people on match if you have no time to date?

[Konfetkette]

I'm not anymore. My subscription ended at the end of August. And none of the people I've talked to ever asked me out no matter how many signals I gave them, like "Hey I am free this weekend!" Either they are totally clueless or just didn't want to go out.

I figured I'd go out if one of these last two ask me out, but they haven't. I'd even make time once or twice a week.. but whatever.

[Batya33]

I never had those discussions on e-mail. On the phone, if the call went well I often would say "nice talking to you, I am open to meeting in person if you are."

[annie24]

how old were these guys? typically, most guys asked me out within 4-6 emails. if they didn't, i just stopped writing.

[Konfetkette]

They were 21-24, one was 26.

 

Do you explain why you stopped writing if they ask why you haven't responded to several emails?

[annie24]

no, they never wrote back once i stopped writing back! maybe one guy did, and he in that email said, 'oh by the way, would you like to go out sometime?' then i wrote back.

[annie24]

guys who want real life relationships online have profiles that have the following qualities:

 

- decent user name. names like 'john56283' or 'soccersteve.' not 'thepantyman' or '9inches4U'. blah

 

- they'll post a photo. guys that don't are married or have gfs. there are exceptions, but that's my rule.

 

- they'll write you an email that's just for you, not a generic mass email they've sent to 100 other women.

 

- they won't talk about sex or sexual positions in those first emails - they're going to want to make a good impression on you.

 

- they write back to you within a day or two, maybe longer if it's a weekend. if they take longer than 3 days to write back, they're not interested.

 

- if they don't ask you out within 4-6 emails, they're not interested.

[Batya33]

I never minded the generic email. My email back was always (if I was interested)

 

thanks for your e-mail. I enjoyed reading your profile. I much prefer talking to typing as a way to see if it makes sense to meet in person so please send me a phone number where I can reach you, thanks.

 

I never expected him to ask me out - I expected that he would agree to talk on the phone asap and that if the conversation went well he would ask to meet me in person or be open to my suggestion to do so.

[Beoslasher]

Yah he might respond, he might not , i've tried the dating site stuff, have a profile on okcupid still =P, but its more for fun, if he messages you he does, if not to lose any sleep over it. I'm sure you'll find a man perfect for ya when you decide the time is right

[D_Lish]

Why should the fact you said that education was your first priority, scare him away?

And if something like that would, then he aint worth your time IMO.

[ghost69]

annie he's in college I only posted this so I can share. I don't really care about finding a bf right now. I am too busy with school.

 

Batya, maybe he is I'll see if he replies.

 

Another funny: this guy whose name I forgot to ask emailed me after I gave him my email. So I go: um hey *insert name here* I can't believe I didn't ask your name before...but what is your name on match?

 

Hah his email slowed down considerably since then . I am so unlucky I have to start meeting people in RL.

 

then why are you so concerned? why have a profile?

[mca1975]

No offence intended, but just wanted to come out with a small gag about being educated in a little spelling maybe, cause I thought you were talking about (s)eduction when I first read your post! lol. (only jokin around).

 

I dont know how anyone can actually meet someone they have NEVER met in real life, though they have been talking on-line, I just couldnt do it! what if they were wearing really horrible shoes or something! argh...!

[annie24]

I dont know how anyone can actually meet someone they have NEVER met in real life, though they have been talking on-line, I just couldnt do it! what if they were wearing really horrible shoes or something! argh...!

 

you have to treat it casually, just meet up and see if there is chemistry there. think of it as if your cousin called you up and wanted you to go on a blind date with her new coworker. you show up, look nice, but don't put too much heart and effort until you really get to know the person.

[JadedStar]

No offence intended, but just wanted to come out with a small gag about being educated in a little spelling maybe, cause I thought you were talking about (s)eduction when I first read your post! lol. (only jokin around).

 

I dont know how anyone can actually meet someone they have NEVER met in real life, though they have been talking on-line, I just couldnt do it! what if they were wearing really horrible shoes or something! argh...!

 

 

You could never meet anyone you only talked to online? Well i sure hope you dont do online dating!

[Konfetkette]

No offence intended, but just wanted to come out with a small gag about being educated in a little spelling maybe, cause I thought you were talking about (s)eduction when I first read your post! lol. (only jokin around).

 

 

Yeah one - English is not my first language and even if it was, I never care how educated or not I sound online. I come online to relax, not think about how good my spelling and grammar is, thanks.

 

two - it was a typo

 

Unbelievable.

[Konfetkette]

guys who want real life relationships online have profiles that have the following qualities:

 

- decent user name. names like 'john56283' or 'soccersteve.' not 'thepantyman' or '9inches4U'. blah

 

- they'll post a photo. guys that don't are married or have gfs. there are exceptions, but that's my rule.

 

- they'll write you an email that's just for you, not a generic mass email they've sent to 100 other women.

 

- they won't talk about sex or sexual positions in those first emails - they're going to want to make a good impression on you.

 

- they write back to you within a day or two, maybe longer if it's a weekend. if they take longer than 3 days to write back, they're not interested.

 

- if they don't ask you out within 4-6 emails, they're not interested.

 

Yeah I knew all that except for the 4-6 emails part and the taking longer than 3 days to reply. Actually I take 3-4 days to reply haha. Oh well.

 

There were some guys who never asked me out so I stopped responding...except that they kept nagging (why aren't you responding?). I figured they'd ask me out if I respond.. Yeah um... no!

[annie24]

Yeah I knew all that except for the 4-6 emails part and the taking longer than 3 days to reply. Actually I take 3-4 days to reply haha. Oh well.

 

There were some guys who never asked me out so I stopped responding...except that they kept nagging (why aren't you responding?). I figured they'd ask me out if I respond.. Yeah um... no!

 

well, if they ask you out then, it's a good sign. you can just tell the truth - that you don't want to chat endlessly with someone online who isn't asking you out. i guess that's what i'd say - or some nicer version of it. though that never happened to me, guys never bugged me about it.

[Batya33]

After a few emails I would write "I much prefer talking to typing as a way to figure out if we should meet in person, so I would appreciate if you send me a phone number where I can reach you."

 

I never expected a man on an on line site to ask me out on a date - we just had to decide whether it made sense to meet in person and after that if he was interested in seeing me again he could ask me out on a date.