Nixee Posted August 17, 2008 Share Posted August 17, 2008 So some of you might be familiar with my story, there is a trail of my healing here on ENA I'm sure... and I'm actually quite proud of myself and where I sit today. The truth is, I've not had any contact with my ex in several months, and I really wouldn't see any need to... though he is always a little ghost in my mind... but I'm facing a huge life change right now, and the possibility of never seeing him again and completely losing touch with each other. The history: We were together for 7 years, we were best friends, extremely close, extremely connected.... but things became difficult and rocky... and when I wanted to work harder, he wanted to give up... and he did.. He gave me up in favor of a co-worker of his, devastating me beyond belief. We lived together, spoke of marriage, spoke of kids, spoke of our future... but now, in two months' time, he is marrying her. In two months' time I will also be moving 3000 miles away, which is what he does not know yet. It is something I have talked about doing for years... in order to go back to school and pursue what it is I really want to do. The fact is, I know he would actually be proud of me. *I* am proud of me. It has taken over a year and a half since our split for me to get over my pain and fear, and to get the strength to do this for myself. And so now I sit here wondering.... do I email him? Do I tell him? What would I say? We still have enough mutual contacts that of course he will know I am gone after the fact anyways, and I will wonder then if he will feel a bit hurt that I didn't tell him or at least offer the chance to say goodbye. Then again, he has plenty going on his life right now... and maybe he won't care. If I sent him something, it wouldn't be in hopes of seeing him, or of reestablishing a connection or anything..... but I also don't want to make myself feel horrible and vulnerable if he brushes it off and gives me a cold response or even silence in return. I guess in the best case scenario, I would hope to get to say goodbye to my old friend, as I say goodbye to my old life... and move on. So what say you ENAers? Is it a foolish thought? Best to just keep moving and let sleeping dogs lie? Or does our history deserve a farewell? Link to comment
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