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orangesoda

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orangesoda last won the day on November 5 2007

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  1. this past saturday marked 6 months of NC on my part. for the rest of you just starting out, it does get easier and easier with each day. just remember to stay busy and focus on the other aspects of your life.
  2. um no. you managed to get rid of the crazy, why try to find it again?
  3. Day 5 Afternoon Feeling low. I think the finality of the situation started hitting me and it's not pleasant at all. Unfortunately it's provoking alot of memories and emotions. I almost hate myself for feeling confident that I could somehow make this work. But I don't want it to because I don't want to make the effort without her showing some effort as well. I hope this passes.
  4. Day 4 PM So turns out she called earlier because she's being harassed and just wanted to be on the phone to get the guy away from her...or so she says. Sigh. I know now that this relationship will never work. There are too many obstacles. But my anger is turning to annoyance now. Only a couple days after I tell her we shouldn't see each other anymore, she starts with the games. Calling, hanging up, texting, then calling again. Makes me realize why I stayed single for so long. This kind of crap gets so sickening after a while.
  5. Day 4 Afternoon She calls. I answer. Hangs up on me without a word. Fun stuff.
  6. Day 4 AM Don't know why but I feel some moments of anger. Not too crazy about that. Otherwise I'm doing pretty okay. Thank god for my job that lets me add shifts.
  7. Day 3 AM feel alright now. not too bad. bit sad but its easy to find all the reasons (many) that we wouldnt work out in the end. gonna eat bfast.
  8. Day 2 PM 1:30am...not feeling too good. lots of ups and downs. okay one hour, later not so okay. hmmm, this is going to be harder than i'd hoped. Right now just okay. Didn't make it to the gym so need to make a emphasis on working the hell out of my body so I can sleep at nights. hope the rest of you are doing better. Day 3 tomorrow. Doing this is kind of cool in a way.
  9. Day 2 AM Woke up, no calls/texts/emails, etc. Strangely not surprised and not as disappointed as I thought I'd be. Hopefully tonight will be as easy. Going to go to gym and pound myself silly to make sure I pass out.
  10. Day 1 I broke things off. Said that I could not play second fiddle to other men in her life. I walked away and did not look back. Strangely, I felt great relief for a couple hours after, at work. I didn't get any sleep the night before so I'm in a bit of a zombie state. But now at home, it's nearly midnight, and I feel quite empty inside. It's hard but it must be done. I ache inside.
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