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Update on status...need advice

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Hi there! Well needless to say all of the advice on here, from my family and friends, etc, has helped me TREMENDOUSLY, so thank you SO VERY MUCH! I've learned that I needed to work on me, more than I had ever thought and I'm actually thankful for each obstacle that I'm met with because I learn a little more about myself each time.


Anyhow, you know the story...I was being ignorant and mean pregnant gf and bf of 4 years and best friend decided we needed some time, said he just couldn't handle me anymore. Well...I left him alone...gave him what he wanted. Yesterday we had our 5 month sonogram appt so Monday I emailed him to remind him just in case he still wanted to go. He said that he was actually going to email me, he asked how I was and said he still wanted to go. Yesterday we went together with my daughter who is 10.


When I had seen him at work earlier he got this huge smile on his face (like he always used to when he saw me with his eyes twinkling). I could always tell with his eyes his true feelings and how much he loved me or was mad at me. It was really was love. He started rubbing my belly right away and laughing saying how big I was getting. It was really nice.


When we went to meet up to leave he turned the corner and I suppose I was smiling because he looked at me and started smiling back. He said..."I haven't seen you smile like that in so long. Look at how happy you are! That's what I like to see." I said "Yeah, I guess I am happy!" He said "I guess it has to do with this time we've spent apart?" I told him "Yeah, I guess...I've just been doing a lot." He said "well what have you been doing? I like it!" I told him that I've been doing a lot of this and this (pointing to my mind and my heart). I also grabbed the cross around my neck and said "Oh and this too!" He said, "well whatever it is, keep doing it!" I was so surprised that he had seen that I had done so much soul searching lately that it was pouring through me. We were also driving and just talking about what we've been up to. I asked how his life has been since we last talked and he said busy. I said "anything else?" He said "peaceful." It hurt a bit to hear, but he was like "That didn't sound mean did it? I didn't mean it to be?" I said "No not at all because I can understand." He shot a look at me like WHO IS THE WOMAN SITTING NEXT TO ME?! It was great! My...how I've grown. I would have never agreed to that before because I wouldn't have seen it or allowed someone to say something like that about me - true or not!


We ended up going to the sonogram and it was beautiful. He held my hand throughout most of it and sat there with my little one on his lap and they were kissing each others cheeks and playing. At one point I looked over because they were quiet and she was sitting accross his lap with her head on his shoulder, he was staring at the screen and his eyes were full of tears. He actually wouldn't even look at me, he just kept staring at the screen. I choked up immediately...it was beautiful.


Afterwards we went to eat and we had a great time! It wasn't strange or anything like that, although I hate this scenario! We laughed and acted like a couple. When he went to leave, he gave my little one a kiss and came to give me one and planted one right next to my lips. When he was getting into his car he said "Bye, I love you!" I was shocked...I just said..."Ok bye, Love you too!" And that was it.


Today at work, he came over on my side of the building to get chips off of the people I work with. He had to have just come over to see me, anyhow though, I looked up and he was looking at me smiling and I just kept smiling back at him and we smiled at eachother for like 1 minute. He came over to talk to me and thanked me for dinner and gave me a bite of his sandwhich. We chit chatted for a bit and then he said..."Ok...I'll talk to you later!"


So what do you guys think? I'm just going to keep leaving him alone and not bothering him, even though it hurts. But, at the same time...I'm changing soooo much and I LOVE IT! I know many people will turn against this at this point, but I've truly given myself to the Lord and I'm loving the person he's helping me to be!


Do you think there's still hope for us to pull this through?


Thanks and Blessings!

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