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Ladies I have a question. When you come across a guy in public and you....

ConfusedDater

By ConfusedDater
in Dating Advice

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JadedStar Collaborator

JadedStar

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But why you be making eye contact with anyone in public unless it's a guy you think is handsome?

 

I make eye contact with many people just to smile and say hello...men, women and/or children.

 

Friendly people do this often.

 

Or, you might be looking as you noticed something familiar or they have on something interesting, etc.

 

Many reasons other than just "i think he is handsome".

 

I think an eye locking glance of more than a couple of seconds (try looking at someone for three whole seconds...its a really long time when you are looking at a stranger) then there might be some flirtatious interest. Don't just judge the eye contact, also factor in the length of time the eyes lock and any other body language.

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poloplayer Enthusiast

poloplayer

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If I look at someone for longer than it takes to smile and nod, then I'd say yes it's showing interest or just a way of flirting.

 

I don't see how that's counter productive though.. ? I'm confused

 

Ah, maybe it's just me then. I would take that as a sign of 'why is she staring at me?' If she is more upbeat and friendly with a nice smile, then I find that to be far more attractive than a stare.

 

Again, this is just me. Maybe most guys would take a stare as an invitation of interest and flirting.

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JadedStar Collaborator

JadedStar

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Ah, maybe it's just me then. I would take that as a sign of 'why is she staring at me?' If she is more upbeat and friendly with a nice smile, then I find that to be far more attractive than a stare.

 

Again, this is just me. Maybe most guys would take a stare as an invitation of interest and flirting.

 

Well staring and making brief eye contact with a smile are two different things. That is why I added the part about the eye lock. More than a second or two looking into the eyes of a stranger would be more likely a flirtatious thing vs just looking into someone's eyes quickly and smiling in a friendly manner.

 

The TYPE of smile is also key. Intuitive people can tell a playful smile from a friendly one. The tilt of the head from a female is also sometimes a playful gesture. If she makes eye contact for more than a millisecond and smiles while tilting the head to the side that is normally a flirtatious gesture. Sociology 101 LOL

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sedated Rookie

sedated

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Lol I'm not sure if this is what you'd do CD.. but if you're ever feeling a bit roguish try telling this to the women who make eye contact with you

 

"Hello. You look like someone I could be interested in."

 

You might not have every chick falling into your arms, but sooner or later you'll hit the jackpot my friend. Think of it as a way to cut through all the games and find out if that girl is interested or not.

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ConfusedDater Proficient

ConfusedDater

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Lol I'm not sure if this is what you'd do CD.. but if you're ever feeling a bit roguish try telling this to the women who make eye contact with you

 

"Hello. You look like someone I could be interested in."

 

You might not have every chick falling into your arms, but sooner or later you'll hit the jackpot my friend. Think of it as a way to cut through all the games and find out if that girl is interested or not.

 

I'm just going to be honest and say-"excuse me, I'm normally don;t approach women in public because I'm a little shy so just bare with me. I just had to tell you that I think you are a beautiful women and hope you enjoy the rest of your day."

 

and then walk away

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ImThatGirl Mentor

ImThatGirl

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^^ Sounds good. But you may need to take out the "I normally don't approach women in public because I'm a little shy so just bare with me" sometimes.... Makes it a little bit of a long comment.

 

You say then walk away. I hope you don't mean go up to a girl - sputter this comment out - and run the other direction.

 

Your tone of voice will be key in this as well.

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ConfusedDater Proficient

ConfusedDater

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^^ Sounds good. But you may need to take out the "I normally don't approach women in public because I'm a little shy so just bare with me" sometimes.... Makes it a little bit of a long comment.

 

You say then walk away. I hope you don't mean go up to a girl - sputter this comment out - and run the other direction.

 

Your tone of voice will be key in this as well.

 

 

 

it worked for my friend

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tryinrealhard Rookie

tryinrealhard

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Why girls smile depends on their personality. Some girls smile to literally everyone within a 30 foot radius. That's just them. I smile at people that are non-threatening: Other girls that are younger than me but have good vibes, cute guys, little kids. Sometimes, if I'm down I won't even smile at a guy that is cute because I feel like it's a way of putting myself out there for rejection (in the form of a laugh, a gross face, or being ignored). It's really complicated cause everyone's different...and some women are really evil. My cousin smiles at guys, then loves to get them to ask her out so she can turn them down. She thinks it's hilarious. whatever. You should just smile and be happy, buddy. Someday a girl's gonna smile back and say, "Hey stranger." Want proof? rent 'Closer'.

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ImThatGirl Mentor

ImThatGirl

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Confused - I did a little experiment in regards to this thread last night. Went out with my parents - they watched a concert, I hung around the casino mingling... Much eye contact. There's definitely a difference between eye contact reflecting just a friendly person and eye contact reflecting interest. And honestly, once that eye contact is made - you know... Well I do. Maybe I'll post a thread about it later this weekend.

 

I just don't understand the difficulty some have in making eye contact, talking, getting phone numbers, and going from there.

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