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Trying to explain to my female friend about ending the 1st Phone conversation but she won't listen

ConfusedDater

By ConfusedDater
in Dating Advice

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ConfusedDater Proficient

ConfusedDater

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So I guess I can share this with some of you ladies. When you end the first conversation with a guy always remember to end it in a pleasant way with a mention of a future conversation. My friend has a habit of ending a phone conversation like this when she talks to a guy for the first time

 

"Ok well let me get ready to get off this phone so I can go to bed and get up for work tomorrow"

 

 

HUH??-lol And she wonders why MEN don't call her back.

 

 

Has any female on this board ever ended a first conversation like that?

 

 

Just like me on saturday, I talked to this girl for about an hour and the way she ended the conversation just kind of turned me off

 

"well I about to head out to get my car washed and go to the supermarket"

 

 

HUH? She earned a quick deletion of my phone list

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shikashika Mentor

shikashika

Posted
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this is your friend? my parents, my friends, my boyfriends, lots of people talk like that, no big deal..

 

I wouldn't care if someone talked like that to me... why does it bother you so much? it's not even rude in the slightest!

 

you certainly over react about a lot of things

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

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i hang up on friends like that all the time. wth are you talking about man?

 

'i'm about to eat, talk to you later.' i'm not going to call back when i'm done eating though.

 

'well i'm getting my car washed so i'll let you go.'

 

'well, i'm heading into class.'

 

all normal sayings. i like how you are giving tips to ladies here. *rolls eyes*

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Crazyaboutdogs Proficient

Crazyaboutdogs

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Well, any guy I would talk to would have to get used to me saying "uh oh, my dog has to go pee, I will call you right back!". All of my friends are now used to me telling them this while in the middle of a conversation...I know the lakes my dog can produce if I don't get him out the door in time!"

 

Anyway, what your friend said is not so terrible...just the realities of life. People have things to do and it doesn't mean you will never hear from them again just because they have to get off the phone and take care of business.

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raffi_FL Rookie

raffi_FL

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That isn't rude at all. It is just a normal way of telling whoever you're talking to that you have to get going because you have "fill in the blank" to do.

 

What would be rude is "'I want to get off the damn phone right now, you talk too much!"

 

How do you normally end phone conversations?

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

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I think confused dater is just a bored troll.

 

 

Proably laughing his head off every time he starts this threads and thinking, "these people think i'm serious?!?!"

 

ha ha!

 

nobody is smart enough to deceive an ENAer. not over and over again at least.

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ConfusedDater Proficient

ConfusedDater

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when I talk to a girl for the first time on the phone, this is how I end the conversation if I enjoyed the conversation.

 

Well I guess I will start getting ready for bed but I just want to say I enjoyed talking to you tonight and was wondering what is the best time to call you in the evening? Ok well Have a good night and I will talk to you soon

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

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when I talk to a girl for the first time on the phone, this is how I end the conversation if I enjoyed the conversation.

 

Well I guess I will start getting ready for bed but I just want to say I enjoyed talking to you tonight and was wondering what is the best time to call you in the evening? Ok well Have a good night and I will talk to you soon

 

you would think it would be nice and all scripted huh? sorry bud, but the world doesn't work that way.

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annie24 Grand Master

annie24

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in the beginning, i prefer to have the guy making the moves on me, so i don't want to be too forward or pushy by assuming that me and this guy will start talking every night now, especially if we haven't even been on one date! if we've made plans for a date, i'll say, 'see you on friday!'

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servedcold Explorer

servedcold

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Agree that some politeness is great in an impolite world. Problem is that early on, it is so out of the norm that it can make you sound strange, even creepy. Sad but that's the world we live in.

 

Rather than any scripted ending, use your tone to let her know it was a good call on your end, and smile while you are on the phone, the difference in tone of someone smiling is HUGE. In fact, when you are on the phone with a new woman, smile the entire time, will show through.

 

Also, lots of people give too much detail when hanging up, feeling they need to describe why they have to go in detail, don't fault women for this. Today, it translates into "I am ready for the conversation to end, but don't want to cut you off thinking that I'm taking another call, bored, or American Idol is coming on, because that would be rude, so I'm going to tell you what I'm going to be doing immediately upon hanging up instead..."

 

BTW, you should be the one ending early phone calls to women, and sooner rather than later. They won't mind, provided you have been light and cheerful, as they have a whole list of people they are about to call to describe their chat with you in infinite detail and get feedback. Here's where the stock dating advice "less said on the phone the better" comes into play also.

 

I always end early phone calls at an opportune moment, never cutting them off, always smiling with "hey I gotta run, great talkin to you, look forward to seeing you on ____" because unless it's a friend, I'm never calling a woman without making plans with her early on. One piece of dating guru advice that is actually spot on for guys is "less time on the phone, more in person."

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Crazyaboutdogs Proficient

Crazyaboutdogs

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Posted
when I talk to a girl for the first time on the phone, this is how I end the conversation if I enjoyed the conversation.

 

Well I guess I will start getting ready for bed but I just want to say I enjoyed talking to you tonight and was wondering what is the best time to call you in the evening? Ok well Have a good night and I will talk to you soon

 

I think asking the best time to call in the evening is actually very considerate because some people have stuff to organize when they get home from work...calling too early or too late might get a more rushed conversation. 9:00 pm is often a good time because usually a person is more relaxed at that point, having gotten the evening chores etc done, and it is still too early for bed.

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ConfusedDater Proficient

ConfusedDater

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Hmm, why are you calling her tonight? Not the best plan IMO to call for a chat the night before a date. Let her anticipate unless you have to iron out some details, and that "ironing out" phone call should clock in at under two minutes.

 

 

Ok well 10 min, i didn't call last night so I wanted to tell her the time for tomorrow at lunch.

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servedcold Explorer

servedcold

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Posted
Ok well 10 min, i didn't call last night so I wanted to tell her the time for tomorrow at lunch.

 

If it's just to tell her the time for the date, please consider two minutes tops. Save your charming, flirty talk or chat for when you can see the effects on her face.

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