on3break Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Within the past two weeks I have become involved with a girl who has a boyfriend of 3 years. Her boyfriend lives out of state and his job requires him to be on the road for 6 months out of the year. She has said that she needs to, "reevaluate her life" and has also said that while she does love her boyfriend he, "isn't always good at being a boyfriend." I know I am in the position of getting hurt and have tried not to develop feelings for her. Should I continue to wait for her to contact me? Link to comment
judyness Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 NO definitely not. You don't want to be the scum bag who is the third wheel here. Be a man and leave her alone. Don't contact her at all. If she wanted to reevaluate her life she break up with her bf, but she still loves him so shes just looking for comfort while hes gone. Shes being selfish here and will only hurt you. FIND SOMEONE who is single. Link to comment
BeStrongBeHappy Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 She could be using you to kill time til her boyfriend is in town, then you won't hear from her til he leaves again. Tell her you only want to date her if she's single and broken up with him, and stick to it. Link to comment
angelsoft Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 She is using you for her own satisfaction ONLY. She truly doesn't care about your feelings, because if she did she would not have dragged you into this. She knows that you cannot be happy with her having a boyfriend. However, she is happy in knowing that she is "secure" (having either one of you to fall back on). She doesn't need to "reevaluate" her life. She needs to "reevaluate" her morals and self-respect because she doesn't have any. If she is so willing to cheat on her boyfriend, than where does that leave you if you end up with her? We already know she doesn't value a real relationship, because if she did she wouldn't be cheating on her current boyfriend. Link to comment
simply complicated Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 I was in the exact same situation a few years back, it's actually the reason I started posting here, there is nothing good that can come of this, take it from me, leave it be, she has a BF already, and wheather or not it's going good with them is her problem, don't be part of the problem, get out of it now. Why would you want someone like her in your life anyways, think of the best case scenario, she leaves him and goes out with you instead. Thats terrible, because she has left one guy to be with another, which will eventuallly happen to you, you will never fully trust her, and she won't be over him yet, you would be her rebound. This girl just wants her cake and eat to, get out of it while you can, before emotions run high. Link to comment
musicguy Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 first off, never get involved with a girl who has a boyfriend, regardless of if he has an out of state job or is in town. You're just setting yourself up to be hurt, plus, she's already with somebody. Just be her friend. Link to comment
MaNg0s Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Please dude do yourself a favour get out of that relationship. If she did love her boyfriend he would not cheat on him in the first place. Don't be the bad guy in this relationship get out of it while you can you will meet someone else. Link to comment
on3break Posted March 8, 2008 Author Share Posted March 8, 2008 I appreciate the quick responses. I knew the answer to my own question before I posted on here. I knew that I would only get hurt and simply needed others to reinforce my own thoughts. Its tough because when we are together we get along so well. I imagine her breaking up with her BF and dating me and then I tell myself that if she is willing to cheat on her current BF what would stop her from cheating on me? Any more thoughts? Thanks. Link to comment
musicguy Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Just break it off with her. There's a girl at my workplace who has a boyfriend and I imagine her breaking up with him and dating me, but I know that's never gonna happen. Why jeopardize their relationship. Find another girl who you can get along with who's single. It's not like there aren't any girls around your area who are just like her Link to comment
LBP Posted March 8, 2008 Share Posted March 8, 2008 Same thing happened to me. You're better off not talking to her. That's what I did and I'm happier for it. She'll likely try to keep reaching out to you and it'll be hard to ignore, as it's such an ego trip, but I advise keeping things cool when she does so. Link to comment
pink1607307777 Posted March 9, 2008 Share Posted March 9, 2008 she is using you she is untrustworthy get out now! Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 cut ties. romantic interest to someone that is attached is not a good look man. Link to comment
on3break Posted March 20, 2008 Author Share Posted March 20, 2008 UPDATE About two weeks ago this same girl broke up with her boyfriend and we have since been spending a lot of time together. I know I am her "rebound" but I am struggling to not develop feelings for her once again. There is a physical part of the relationship I do not want to go away but should we continue to do this the greater the chances I will develop feelings for her. Should I gently stop talking to her or let her contact me to test her interest? Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 20, 2008 Share Posted March 20, 2008 if you think you want more, keeping it strictly physical is just going to pull your feelings in eventually. Link to comment
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