6 months after and I'm having a meltdown

[sunflower_girl]

What is wrong with me? We broke up at the end of July (initiated by me) and yet I woke up crying this morning! I miss him soooo much.

 

We still talk on the phone 1-3 times each week, we still end out coversations with "love you *kiss*"...it's hard getting over someone when you know that they still love you! The problem with us is that I'm currently in PA for college, he's attending a university in Texas. I have a year and a half of school left but plan on going to law school up north after this. Having a long distance relationship with no end in sight was too emotionally draining.

 

I miss him so much...sometimes I question if I had made the right decision. Why am I here? All the people I care about are in Texas....why did I decide to move half a country away???

 

During our coversation last night we talked about summer plans. (For the past two summers, we saw each other because I was back home.) However, he's going to stay in his city this summer to take extra classes--he won't be coming back to our hometown. He said that between a full load of classes and working, he'll probably never see me. (His school is an hour and a half away from our hometown.) He said that I have two option--not see him or move in to his apartment for the summer.

 

Both of these choices are terrible! I have an internship in the city, I can't move! What should I do? I feel so overwhelmed and stressed.

[SapphireNoir10]

You know in your heart whats best for you. No matter HOW much you love him you realise that your future is the most important thing. You need your educaiton and internship to live a sucessful and fufilled life.

 

If it simply can't work then maybe your better off letting go.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

You seem to be half in and half out of this relationship, which is torture.

 

I think you should either agree you are a couple and work through the understanding that you will be apart until your education is done, or really break up and find someone local to date.

 

Lots of couples do survive separations (like people in the military), but you have to make a decision that you really ARE together regardless of distance, and make plans for your future.

 

Or decide you are NOT a couple and quite torturing yourself and move on to someone who is available and local.

[robert7x]

I was going to say the problem is you're still in contact with him. I know you love him and all, but if you're not together, in order for you to heal you need to drop all contact for some time.

 

This way you'll always be stuck on him. NC is hard, but it does help... It helped me and many others to get over the break-up.

[PixelPusher]

Yes! Why are you still talking with him 3-times per day and ending your conversations with "I love you" if you're broken up? Generally breaking up with someone means your communication is very little to nil, and you never end things with "I love you."

 

You're keeping yourself from healing and you will have these feelings 2-3 years down the line unless you make the decision within yourself to move on. If you think you've made a mistake, then communicate that to him and go from there. But if your individual futures are important to you, and they keep you apart, then you need to sever those ties that are keeping you in emotional limbo. I know it's not easy but you've got to do it for your own emotional health.