robert7x

I feel like reading my own relationship, the reason for the end of it and the thoughts after. Brother, i'm in the same damn boat. My ex too left me because she wanted to be single with 2 of her friends that destroyed their own marriage's. I'm completely devasted and heartbroken and dont know how I'll get out of it. Just like you, i too have said many times i'm done with her and all... But the thoughts are not letting me move on. They are slowly making me go insane. I too wish i could just go meet someone, hang out with her, etc... Just to feel something... But my self-worth and self-esteem is so shot that i cant even leave my apartment.

I totally understand what you are saying, and i know you are right, but i just can't think about anything else other then her... I keep thinking that i'll end up single for the rest of my life, and i'll be living all by myself without anybody... I spent such a long time with her that i have no idea how to talk to any other girl or anything like that... Anything i had fun doing before, i just don't have any energy to do... The only thing i'm actually doing is work, but that ends at 5 and then i have to come home and think, think and more thinking.... It hurts so much...

Thanks... I'm trying, but i know it will take time. It's just too damn hard...

I've been with this girl for 7 years. We started going out in 2000 after i fnished high school. I fell in love with her, and it seems she did too with me. Most of the time we had together was great... We even went to college together and it seemed like we were going to be together forever. 2 years ago, she cheated on me and it hurt like hell... probably it felt the same way i'm filling now. After talking to her and stuff, we ended up back together... (the story about cheating was, she went out with some friends, that i didn't know about, behind my back, and was with this guy. She claims nothing happened, but by hearing from other people she was actually with that guy for a month) Crazy as i am, i took her back. Most of the time we talked about our future and how we'll get married and have our life together, but when i actually asked her to marry me, she turned me down saying she can't leave her family and she is not ready yet... This went on for another 2 years. 3 months ago, she told me she has to go back to her old Country in europe (which we are actually both from) and try to live there because her parents are making her go there. Through out this whole time of this i kept asking her and beging her not to go. I kept telling her that she is not 15 anymore and that she shouldn't let her parents lead the life for her. In one ear out the other... The day came, she cried, i cried, i still kept telling her the same thing and she didn't listen... She told me she'll be back, that she has to try this and she'll be back within a month... I knew that that's not true because she did lie to me in the past every time sometimes serius comes up... We talked 2-3 times since then (she left the christmas day, what a christmas present huh?) and she started telling me how her family now won't let her talk to me... that i am a bad infulence on her and stuff like that.... Now this family knows me and i've been with them and i got nothing like that out of them... they all seemed to like me and were very nice to me. After that i got mad, but still talked to her because i miss her so much... I've been feeling pretty much like crap this whole week, which i was off from work too... I don't have many friends as they all kind of started to blow me off when i got into the relationship with this girl.. Most of them were jealous that we spent so much time together and not with them. I only have 2 really good friends that is actually a couple and they started dating the same time we did and are living together and have what i wanted to have with this girl... I see that this relationship has ended... 7 years down the drain and i'll be 25 this year.... The whole relationship was kind of up and down anyway, but we stayed together. I'm not a guy that likes going out to parties, clubs or bars. I'm also very shy when it comes to talking to a girl... The thing that keeps going through my head this whole week is that i'll end up all alone. I love this girl so much that i was willing to do anything for her. I can't do anything... even my best hobby which is working on my project car has died down. I just have no reason to live at all... Only time this week i actually felt good was when i talked to her for a minute but that shortly took a turn for worse... I basically just wanted to tell my story and get some advice on what i can do now.... I just miss her so much and i keep thinking about the happy times and the time we spent together. I'm afriad i might do something stupid because this pain is just too damn much... I'd rather wish i lost an arm or a leg then this inside pain....