21 Year Old Hag!

[mahlina]

Doesn't anyone ever feel like life is just getting more and more boring as you get older?

 

I feel like such an 'old Maid'. I do nothing but work and go to school. Just recently, I broke up with my ex. I don't do anything but work, school, and on my free time, sit and moap about the breakup. Besides that, I go to the beach, gym, Ikea, and surf the net. Most of the time, I'm doing things by myself.

 

I feel so old for my age. Once in a while I'll go to parties. It's not my scene though. I especially hate it because I always meet the wrong types of guys there.

 

Everytime I let a guy into my heart, he always ends up breaking it. I seem to attract the wrong attention. I meet players. I guess for my age, all they want is a piece of ass....but that's where I draw the line. I could pretty much smell a dog when I see one. Nothing else goes from there, other than superficial conversations on the phone.

 

I've been burned twice by 2 past lovers. It's tough! That's why I avoid clubbing, parties, and meeting new guys in general. Plus, I'm the shy type, I work, hard, study a lot, and just have different values that are typical of the modern day girl. I feel like such a Quaker! O

 

I feel like the type who wants to be a hip mom and settle down. At the same time, I like being an ambitious, career oriented, modern-woman.

 

That's probably why I always get hurt. They probably get bored of me b/c I'm different...

 

I meet guys here and there, but I intentionally put on a protective barrier b/c I don't want to get hurt. I just weed them out...

 

It's like I'm living in the wrong generation...

I'm suppose to do what most 21 year olds do: smoke, drink, do drugs, and enjoy permiscuous sex, but I'm not like that. I feel so out of place...

 

Is something wrong with me? Am I depressed?

[in_the_mirror]

nothing is wrong with you. you may be a little depressed but i mean it could be from the recent breakup. a family member of mine is the same age and has had pretty much the same problem. but she is focusing on her future right now so that she is independent and can support herself and know that she is secure with herself before she is secure with someone else. i suppose knowing what you want before you want to know what someone wants. and that way when someone is willing to commit themselves to a girl for something other then a piece of her ass you'll realize how great it is on top of knowing that you waited to be happy with who you are and what you want in life first.

so what if people think you are boring. ask yourself if YOU think your boring. if not keep doing what is making you happy. if working hard and going to school getting a good education is good enough and makes you happy do that. if you find it not fun going to parties don't . it is your life do what you want. not what other people think you should.

well i hope this helped. keep a smile on your face life doesn't suck it just takes awhile for everyone to find out what makes it look better.

[jamorales]

I felt exactly the same as you when I was about 20. Sick of getting drunk at parties. Fed up with jerks. All I can say is that it will get better, and it always happens when you least expect it. Everything happens for a reason and God has a plan that is bigger than all of us. When I was a kid a girl used to torture me. Threatened to beat me up for 3 years straight. As a result of that my dad decided to put me in Tae Kwon Do. I thought that was it's own reward after placing at the US Tae Kwon Do Junior Olympics. But boy was I wrong. I met some great friends through martial arts that I stayed in contact with long after I quit training. One in particualr stands out. His name is Alex. We ended up getting married and having an amazing little girl. The point I'm trying to make is that I had to come home from school crying every day for three years to meet my soul mate and have my daughter. Sometimes God puts us through the worst of things to get us to the best of things. And He will absolutely never give you more than you can handle. Keep your head up.

[Gilgamesh]

You feel like an old maid?

 

Your at a very difficult time in your life, girls mature mentally way before guys do, guys your age just wanna party and have sex, they are still studying or just starting off on their carreers and for the most part are not looking for settling down or family life.

 

You on the other hand have grown up, your not impressed buy the phoney players, and shallow guys that just want to jump your bones. so its slim pickins.

 

I'm suppose to do what most 21 year olds do: smoke, drink, do drugs, and enjoy permiscuous sex, but I'm not like that. I feel so out of place

...

 

Who says thats what 21 year old are "supposed" to do, who make you feel that way? the same immature idiots that do them thats who, who cares what those numb skulls say or do, there are other men and women just as mature as you, that are a little to smart to be fooled by players, that dont just "wanna make out" its not easy to find people like these at your age, but they are out there.

 

Your no old maid for have learned quickly through experience whats important, it just means your smart.

[Down-In-A-Hole]

Will you marry me???

 

Just kidding! But in all seriousness, I was very relieved to read your post because it let me know that there are girls out there like you. I just hope someday I will be able to find that girl.

 

Just stay true to your beliefs and eventually a guy will come along that shares the same qualities and values as you.

 

Take care.

[idunno]

you'll have good things come your way. continue to refuse to compromise. you are a gem.

[Blue Eyes]

You may think you are an old maid, but you are a perfect example of how a 21 year old should behave. It's horrible to see the level that some people your age have gotten to. Anyways, if you're attracting the wrong guys, I hate to say this, but it might be the way you look and/or act, although I'm not saying that you do this, just saying it in general. The expression you wear should not be a suggestive one, and you wouldn't want to wear incredibly tight clothing or walk around like you're looking for a one-night stand. If you want a man that will adapt the who you want to be, dress and act like you imagine someone would if they were a hip mom/business woman/etc. Also, there are several other places where you can meet guys. Concerts...not rock or rap, but maybe something more sophisticated. Some coffeehouses, too, and the like. Good luck with finding that guy...you have some exemplary qualities in you, so put 'em to good work!

[Cid]

Hey you are not alone I feel the same.

 

I'm suppose to do what most 21 year olds do: smoke, drink, do drugs, and enjoy permiscuous sex, but I'm not like that. I feel so out of place

 

You know what I am 21 I dont smoke, I use to drink and use drugs (I am not proud of those days) I hanve never had sex. I havent had a girl friend. To make it worse I live in the state that I should be married by now. so I know how you feel. Hey at lest you have a beach to go to I have the mountions but it is all fun. You know what I think all of us 21 year olds feel like this. But we will get out of this stage of are life. I hope that this helps and good luck.

[secret_agent_man]

Hold on to your seat here... but you are a rare woman, and one that many many honest, good hearted men have been looking for!

 

Don't EVER sell yourself short, the only thing that I see from your post is that you know what you want out of life! The main reason people your age go to parties all the time and don't respect themselves is that they have no goals, and have not figured out what they aim to do with their lives.

 

I'm not saying that going to a party is a bad thing, and I'm not saying that everyone who parties fits into my description, but I think you know what I'm getting at.

 

Honestly, though... you seem to be a very intelligent woman, and you seem to understand yourself well, so all you need to do to find a good guy is to look in the right places! This is where I'm not experienced, as I usually don't go looking for men

 

But maybe someone else can give some advice as to where to find these guys? Anyone?

 

Best of luck, keep your head up!

S.A.M.

[mahlina]

My response to Blue Eyes:

 

No, I don't wear tight revealing clothes. It's just that my clothes fit me well. It's form fitting. To also add to that, I don't even send the wrong messages to them, I'm usually very quiet, and polite. I'll say hi when they say hi. I'm curteous when they're curteous.

 

Often times, they make me feel sick, especially when I get these weird looks from older men, it's disgusting. It makes me just want to run away and hide. That's another reason why I avoid social scenes like bars in general. (Maybe, I have some kind of social anxiety disorder or something.)

 

 

To everyone in this forum

 

Thank you so much for your posts. I guess you guys are right. I didn't realize it, but a lot of people my age don't really know exactly what they want. They run off doing pointless things like burn their money on: materialistic crap that doesn't even matter, alchohol, and cigarette's.

 

I guess I really do know what I want, it's just peer pressure and mass media that forces young people to buy into this dellusional kind of lifestyle. Maybe, I should get rid of my cable t.v. and mtv all together! I don't ever watch it anyway.

 

You guys really made my day...Thank You so much, ! It's really refreshing to hear that I'm not the only one who feels this way!

 

In the meantime, I'll just sit back and croche a sweater...j/k, I'm not that boring!

[secret_agent_man]

Well, we're always glad to lend an ear! You're definitely not alone, and there are plenty of decent guys out there, it just may take time to find the right one for you.

 

In the meantime, I'll just sit back and croche a sweater...j/k, I'm not that boring!

What's wrong with making a sweater?!?! (I know you were kidding, but still...) The ideal girl for me would be the one who likes those quiet nights anyway! lol... so being laid back isn't so bad, no worries!

 

S.A.M.