04leah

hi! when reading this i hope you arent too appalled at my train of thought, but i am being completely genuine and could really use your advice- so it would be great if you could post a reply- whether it be negative or not! lol anyway hi, im leah and im 23. I have just qualified as a doctor. all my life i have been dedicated to this career, knowing the years ahead of me will be spent training, being examined constantly, working etc. it is what i want to do so much. however, it has always been my dream to have a young family. to get married and have beautiful children and be a young mother. but i know i cant have both. so here comes the dilema... since the age of 18, a very close friend and I have discussed what it would be like to be married and have children. he comes froma very different background to me, he is from a wealthy family and now works in the city, earning 'his millions' lol anyway he has always understood my need to work and make it to where i want to get, career wise. also he too has always wanted to start a family reasonably young. so we 'agreed' maybe that we would one day marry and he would work from home and look after the children, whilst i work in the city. throughout that time and this we have gone off to uni, but been very close to each other still. we have both had other relationships, but nothing serious. in the mean time we 'flirted' and giggled together. it has now reached the point where he has asked me if i shall marry him. i have been brought up knowing how precious marriage is, and i know it is for life. i know i will have an amazing life with him, with a beautiful country house, swimming pool, you name it... he will be a wonderful father and a loyal and caring husband, i have no doubt. i wish so badly to have children and create a family of my own. should i marry my friend? who i know i love, but i dont know if i'm 'in love'. he could give me everything. i dont know what to do. what if i throw this opportunity away of having a fantastic life. maybe i will grow to love him. i dont know, so any input would be great. also what would you personally do? love leah x

hey, well i understand where you are coming from- i self harmed during my GSCEs when i was completely overwhelmed with all the pressure and stress. and you are right, it did kinda release me for a little bit, made me feel incontol. so you arent alone at all. my advice is dont rely on it as an escape mechanism, you can get through anything, yourself, mind over matter. you dont need to do it. dont depend on an addiction to the feeling of the blade cutting your skin. there are more satisfying things. you dont need to do it, find another release mechanism. i took up running, and it really did help. most evenings, when i was stressed, id hit the road and give it and my body hell. and it really did work. you can do it hun, believe in your ability to survive without it- because you can

i think everyone gets really down sometimes, what with exams, coursework, friends, relationship worries. it is hard being a teen, but i promise u things will get better. try and relax like u said, find something u really enjoy and throw urself into it. ive started going to the gym and it is great to release all those worries as u put in 120%. ull feel loads better afterwards and when things start to worry u again, go again. life feels so much better when u can do that!

hey dont worry about it! ive just passed my test after two failed attempts and i hade exactly (still have) the same problems as you. letting down the parents was the worst, made me book another test two mins after i failed. also i get losing my concentration, but driving isnt that simple- it is all about whats on the road at that specific time and u just have to go with the flow. u'll pass soon im sure, just dont give up. sometimes all kinds of stuff gets me down and i also keep it bottled up- i find it easier that way, mayb not that easier to deal with, but at least i dont get all the questions etc. try and stay happy and u'll find everything will slip into place sooner or later!

hey all! just wondering if you have any advice r experiences you are willing to share... anyway when i was 14/15 (am 18 now) i met the most amazing guy who i started a kind of relationship with. anyway i hurt him coz i got scared (being only 14) and pushed him away. he later joined the army- saw him a couple of times after, never really spoke to him. ive come to realise what a wonderful person he is and i want to get back with him. only problem is ive heard he is back from iraq and in the country. even tho he lives so far away i was wondering whether i should drive up and see him- hoping to just chat. he probably hates me, thats why i cant call, plus i havent spoken to him in 2 1/2 years. maybe if i drive up, stay at another friends who lives in the same town and hope i see him????!!!!!! i havent a clue! please help leah xxx