pastela

maybe you should not focus on the drugs first (cause if shes doing them and not admitting it, she may be addicted and its going to be very hard to just stop) if you really care about her.. (i mean you want her to stop, and you dont know what to do) try to get some of her trust. I know trust is an issue with drugs. But ask her how shes feeling, get to know why she feels the need for these drugs if shes doing them. Dont ask her directly at first, ask her about her life, once you gain this trust (if your willing to work with her) maybe you can confront her and tell her excately how you feel, dont tell her why its wrong, tell her what its doing to her and you. Then decide on an option is she is willing to give it up. Goodluck, drugs are a very hard issue to deal with and most people focus on the person doing the drugs not what the drugs are doing to the person. Its a disease as is being an alocholic, its hard to quit over night, its a process. Take care, Liz

By the way I forgot to mention: to get your emotions out.. I have heard you should listen to something that touches you.. maybe even a sad song that you love that gets to you.. Some people think this may make you depressed all day but I dont think so. I think its a way to get your emotions out and youll have a much better day. I have found that when I do cry during the day once.. I feel much better after in the long run. Also to let you know, I too get sad sometimes.. and sometimes we need to cry, dont let anyone ever tell you that your being too sensitive.. I think being too sensitive can be a good thing sometimes.. because when your more sensitive your more aware of the people around you and your surroundings. Liz

Hey, Its not always good to be possitive. Its good to be realistic, being possitive may be ignoring things that bug you like this. It is good to face your emotions, don't ever feel bad for it. I think its good for people to cry. Some people even do it daily as a spiritual thing to let their emotions out. I am not sure about your boyfriend though. If him calling you names before did not bug you than maybe you were sad about your day and decided to use your confused emotion on him to give more meaning to what you feel ( I think its also why some people cut themselves, which is not the answer) It makes the pain real. Its hard to be sad and not know why cause then it makes you confused and you feel even worse. I think things like crying everyday for 10 mins or even lighting candles and listening to some music that faces how you feel everyday would help. Its just how some of us are. We cant stay happy 24/7 and though people want to..its not good.. accepting your pain and the fact its all right to be mad sometimes to be sad sometimes.. will help alot. You dont have to have a reason to feel sad.. sometimes people get sad and dont know why but it might be from sight, sound, smell or so on of a bad past experience that they dont remember. I think you should try something like this.. everyday take some time out for you- light a candle, listen to some music, take a bath .. do something but let your true emotions out.. dont make an excuse for them.. just for no reason at all.. even a sad song.. you see if we accept the fact that being sad or angry is sometimes a part of our life... it will help us to accept these feelings and not be so confused or guilty and to deal with them instead of shut them out for another day to get worse. As for your boyfriend, talk to him.. tell him excately how you feel if it bugs you.. tell him the day you had or what your feeling and why it bugs you.. telling you your being too sensitive is not the answer.. it just may be the answer for his own feelings which he will have to face some day soon anyways. But I think you need to focus on you first. I hope this makes some sense or helps.. Take care, liz : our true emotions that society has told us to hide ( maybe even 0X just kidding )

Thankyou and I am sorry for your loss. The thing is its not easy as that. The option of drop out for semester cant be an option because of money problems. I am just wondering how people were able to make it everyday doing things that absolutely needed to be done.. I mean any methods? To not be as tired or depressed. Thanks

I have a question, I am 24 actually (my profile is wrong) and I lost my Dad two weeks ago to Als or maybe a heart attack. My mom refused an atopsy and we did not have a funeral. So i have no clue. Im in school right now and I really want to succeed. But as it goes, I dont even want to go to class, or study. One day ill be fine and go to all classes, the next day I am up all night and can not sleep and then just dont even bother. I am going to counseling right now for a class but everytime I go i feel much worse after. Has anyone here lost their father while they were almost done with college? Have they had these problems and what did you do? Thanks

Hey Slider, I am new to this board but perhaps I could help shead some light on this subject. When I was 9, I was also raped. I dont think it has much to do with you (I could be wrong, I dont know how your relationship went) But i think it has to do with her, not that she is as fault but that she cant accept being close. It may make her uncomfortable. I cant even hug people, i cant stand getting too close and I always run away from possible relationships. She needs to work through it as I am. But unless you were mean or did something bad dont blame yourself and dont blame her.. just be understanding.. maybe try to be a friend and listen. Rape is a taboo subject to talk about I should know, anytime it comes up and I feel comfortable telling someone about it, they shut me out or change the subject. I believe it is a subject for people to talk about so people gain a bigger perspective on whats going on and so rape victims can have an ear. I believe 1 out of every 5 is raped or sexually molested here in the U.S.A.