inastate

Do you share any classes or do you see him regularly at school? Do you know any of his friends? A nice breaker for school is obviously something that you both have in common and if thats the same class etc then I would suggest simply going up to him and talking to him about the current assignment, test, exam - whatever is going on at the moment. Then once you've exchanged a few lines about whatever you can introduce yourself, he will introduce himself you can start chatting etc etc. If shes really shy its important you're not overbearing of course, but ask him if he'd like to talk about any of this school stuff over lunch, or if he'd like to study together sometime. I know that my answer seems to focus on the school work too much, but I think that its easier to approach someone for the first time when know you've got something in common that you can both talk about.

As much as people in Internet relationships want to believe that they "real" - they are not. Chatting, email and talking on the phone is not the same as being with someone in person, going out with them, actually being in their "real" life. I have been in a long distance and thereforeeee Internet based relationship for over two years and I can assure you that having an online relationship and being with someone for real is not the same thing. Being devoid of physical contact, spending time with and actually being around that person is all so important in a relationship, if such a relationship is to be considered as real and taken seriously. I agree that perhaps the trust and emotional elements might be satisfied, but there is so much more to be being with someone than those things. Actually being physically with someone is so important if the relationship is to flourish, grow and progress. For the longest time, I felt similar to how you feel - you think you love her and shes amazing - even though you haven't actually met her yet. Gilgamesh is totally correct when he says that you should meet her as soon as possible. My honest advice is not to even treat her as your girlfriend until you've met her, in fact until you've met her and been with physically her a number of times. I'm sorry to say this but online and offline relationships are simply not the same. I truly wish you the best of luck, that you appreciate each other offline as much as you do online and everything works out. By the way I find it interesting that she is only 4 hours away and you haven't met each other yet? The girl you love is only 4 hours away you haven't met her yet? What are you waiting for?

That is the confusing part - we already have been out to nice restruants/movies/beach/shopping etc. I'm just wondering if she likes me as more than a friend, because we always go out together alone (only been in a group once) and I just think that this type of thing is inconsistent with someone that I would consider to be a normal friend. I guess my question is whether or not girls go out with and spend alot of time with someone who they don't want to be more than friends with. It's confusing I think.

Hi, Over the past few months I've started going out with a friend of mine. We normally go out one to two times per week and we talk on the phone maybe three to four times a week. The more time I spend with her the more I like her, except there is a problem - she has a boyfriend but he is currently living in another country and won't be back for two years. My question is would a girl go out with you if she did not like you as more than a friend? I know that I should be asking her this question, and I most likely will, but I wanted to see what others thought first. Thank you.

I agree with Heb, it doesn't sound like you're over him and its probably not a good idea to contact him until you feel its not too painful to be friends with him.

There is no reason why you shouldn't ask her out. Take her out, get to know her better. If she has a boyfriend and doesn't feel comfortable going out with you for whatever reason then she'll tell you. Good luck!

I think whether you contact him or not at this point depends upon whether you "over" him. By "over" him I mean that when you talk to him you don't get upset or emotional or have any other strong feeling for him. I have gone through a similar experience and found that it was counter-productive to the healing process to stay in contact with my ex. The reason for this was that it would bring up the same feelings that I had before and set-back the healing process. Is your only consideration for his feelings and you are completely over him and would feeling comfortable talking with him as just a friend? If it is then yes perhaps you should contact him, BUT if talking to him is going to set you (or both of you back) then it isn't such a good idea. I noticed your comment that you were just trying to "live my life". If that means your life, without him being a part of it at the moment, then I don't think you should contact him until you feel comfortable to talk to him.