jm1842

I say trust your gut. It happened to me after six years. I just new she was lying and didn't hound her about it but just pursued the truth till I caught her in the act. Or maybe your just paranoid because of previous bad relationships. I hope it all works out for you. Jm

What's crazy is that I still want her. I guess because I spent so much time with her. She called me 4 times today already. I didn't answer the phone at all because I know that it kills her not to know what I am doing. All of her friends tell her that she left me for a loser that's going to end up hurting her. She told me the same thing. I guess she's just looking to have fun. I offered her everything as far as spending the rest of my life with her. I don't think that she's that happy if she is crying to me and she has gained like 20lbs. A female friend of mine talks to her somtimes and tells me all the crap that she is going through and that she is always saying how she can't stop thinking about me, etc. I told her that if your happy I'm happy for you and that she should leave me alone so we can both get on with our lives. She keeps telling me no but all her actions say something else. I'm thinking that maybe she would just be happy if I'm unhappy and wind up with no one. I told her this and she said she's not ready to give up on us. She claims that she needs time. Time for what to still party and then come back when she's good and ready. I try to stay away and she just does things like coming by my work and all that bs to make me initiate contact. Is it true that she's going to come back and snap when I just blow her off and don't give a crap anymore? Is that what it's going to take? I'm so not me right now. I'm usually strong and confident and she's just turning me into everything that I know that I'm not.

After six years I caught her cheating. She calls me complaining about her man that she left me for. To be honest i've been weak and had sex with her a couple of times already. She tells me that she wants to leave him but doesn't want to hurt him. She wants me to go by her house and asks for rides from her work. It's like she wants me to get her busted. Not trying to sound like i'm all that but this guy she left me for is not college educated and is really fat and not good looking. She told me she left because i didn't have enough time for her. Now she's telling me that it's not what she thought and that she didn't know what she had until she lost it. Of course i did the wrong thing and told her that i love her and all that stupid stuff. Well anyway she let me take some pictures and I'm getting pretty pissed off and think that i might send one to her boyfriend. After all he knew that I was her boyfriend at the time. I'm thinking why not put a little hurt into his world. I know that's vindictive but she's really pissing me off. I've asked her several times to just leave me alone since she doesn't want to leave this guy. She keeps telling me that she loves me and wants to be with me. I don't know if she just wants that control or what. I just feel like blowing this all up in her face though. I told her would it help if i just change my phone number and just leave her alone. I had already and she was the one that wouldn't let it go. She told me "no, no I love you and want you. Besides I know where you work, live, and where your parents and family live and if you change your number I have a friend that works for your carrier and can easily get your new one." I almost just want to do this to her so she'll just hate me and leave me the hell alone. I told her that I'm weak but she's not giving me the chance to be strong and strike her out of my life because she won't give me the space. Is this girl just obsessed, crazy or what? Should I give the pictures and phone records and all that crap or what? I'm so mad right now and think that she deserves it. I just would like to know what you'll think. I mean I don't want to do it and have her blow up on me if you know what i mean. I beginning to think that this girl is just plain crazy. By the way she's only been seeing this guy for almost 7 months and dumped me only three months ago. I think that she is seeing that the grass is not greener!!! Any advice or help would be appreciated.

I don't think that it is about giving up at all. I think that it is about moving on. By constantly worrying about your ex you are limiting yourself. You are still living your life for them and getting nothing but pain in return. I have recently been pushed aside for someone I would consider is less of a man than I am. She made her choice and I have to accept that like a man. I cried to her. I told her that she meant more to me than anything in the world. This went on for two weeks and then I finally told her that if she cared about me at all she should just leave me alone. It was the hardest thing that I had to do in my life. I had just graduated from college and was looking forward to marriage and children. I still feel that one day she will come back around and want me. But will I want her then? I turned down my previous ex for her. Yes, I have had this happen before. My ex ex told me she made a mistake after 9 months of no contact. The person she left me for wasn't what she thought and that she missed me and all of that crap. I say crap because at the time that i heard it that's what it was to me. I think that you should just let go of the baggage. If they come back around and you still feel the same way that is great for you. I just don't think that you should wait and put yourself through any unnecessary pain. You have to ask yourself "who's chasing you?' If the answer is nobody then let it be. I personally don't want to be with somone that would make me want to chase them after they left me. I know what my love is worth and it does not come cheap, so I refuse to let it be treated as such.

I'm kind of in the same boat and i was just wondering if anything new has developed in your situation.

She told me that she needed some space after six years. We had not been spending that much time together anyway since it was my last semester at school. I found out that she had been seeing somone else. I tried to work things out with her because i really care for her. She had a child young(not mine), and didn't really experience alot of other relationships. I'm 28 and she's 24. We worked together at my family's business. She quit and now has no job, which i advised against. From what i hear she has been going out to bars and being a little crazy. Things that we really didn't do. There was some contact for a while and the way that she was talking to me made it seem like she really was not happy with her choice. It seemed like she was still playing games though so i told her that it would be best if she just did not call me at all anymore if she really didn't care for me. Well she hasn't not called for two weeks. She did come by the business though. I told her that this was not a good idea last time we talked and she agreed. She tried to make contact with my brother in law and sister. They had both told her when she quit that any contact would be awkward for them due to the circumstances. For someone that wants to "see what else is out there" she sure is going about it in a funny way. This guy that she thinks is so much better than me is a drinker and works as the yard guy at a cement place. He's a lot heavier than me and this to me just doesn't add up. I would have felt a little better if it would have been someone more handsome and more successful. I really don't understand what she get's out of going by my job, even though i'm not there. She must know that my family is going to come running to me telling me "guess who came by today." I want her to come back. I don't know why. I just feel like she made a mistake and that she is going to come and tell me that sooner or later. I'm not saying that our distance is all her fault. I admitted all of my faults to her and told her how i wanted things to change and be better for the both of us. This was before I caught her. I just feel very very hurt. Need some advice.