Husband's female friends

My husband has been going out with a married male friend and 2 single female friends. They go out 4-5 times a year - usually for birthdays. My issue is that I have been told I am not welcome to go with them. They want it to be just them. He never takes me out on dates just us or with other couples alone. We only go out as a family. If we do ever go out it's usually for an anniversary and I'm the one who always plans it. I feel like I should be able to go out with them if I want to. He has no issues with me spending time with his married male friend and his family- but I'm not allowed to join when it's their foursome going out. His friends wife doesn't seem to have a problem- but her husband is a social butterfly and he takes her out a lot.

To me it's like watching my husband plan, get ready and go out on a double date every few months. Am i being irrational- he thinks I'm being irrational. I think it's disrespectful and that he spends more energy on them in a year than on me. It's not like he's not getting sex at home. These are the only group of friends he keeps me from- any other group he expects me to be there for when there are Bbq's or group family dinners - even when he takes work colleagues out- he's asked me to meet them - so it's not like he's ashamed of being out with me. Why is this the only set of friends I'm banned from - I think it's completely wrong and disrespectful. The last time they went out he called and requested for me to be ready for sex when he got home. So I feel something happened to get him worked up! I can't get over that in my head! We have argued about this in the past and out of a need to keep my marriage intact I let it be however after this last outing I just can't let it go anymore-it is making me have panic attacks and making me a mess! I'm not asking that he stop talking or seeing them I'm asking to be included in these outings.

What's his explanation for not including you? Agree you need to plan more date nights and couple time. Start doing that now.

At first he said it was too hard to schedule all of us going out- then he said that he wants to be able to just go out with his friends- then it turned to " it's just the four of us". Thing is this isn't an issue with any of his other friends. And it's not an issue with the male friend because we spend time with his family. It's when the women come into play that it becomes this exclusive group.

Forgot to say I am in no way a restrictive wife- I never tell him he can't do or buy something- this is the only thing that has ever bothered me enough to ask for a change from him.

"I think it's completely wrong and disrespectful."

- You don't have to make excuses for the only opinion that matters. ^

My opinion:

That's bull! (Him and his whatever)

I would be totally on his side if he went out with two guys or one on one with a guy and it was a guy's night and therefore having a wife there would change the dynamic, but the fact that there are two single women and you have never met any of them is worrisome. Who are these friends? are they college friends? Heck, next time I'd be unusually supportive of him going out - figure out where they are going and then put on your hottest office and happen to "run into them" with a friend of yours.