My husband's cheating on me and i found out all he said about me

Hello, friends I am Brianna, I'm 18 and I am married to a guy that's been cheating on me SEVERAL times and we have a son that's just 5 months old, i think he's cheated on me more times that i can imagine.

Well it all started last July me and him were just boyfriend and girlfriend then i found out i was pregnant I told him and we talked it over, WE both knew my parents would not let me get married to him since he is such a pimp and he likes to drink and he's had ALOT of chicks. I told him that my parents would NOT let me leave home and go with him, so he said that he would take to live at his dad's house, without telling my parents or nobody. Well like a week later i left the house and i went to live with him and his dad, there were several times when my mom came over and told me to go back to the house because he was not a good man for me and that i deserved more but i LOVED him and i still do so i did not listen to her.

The first couple of months everything went just fine he worked and came back right away, he only used his cellphone for his job, we went out together, we were together just fine, but then he started changing and i noticed he never got back from work until really late, then he would suddenly go out, BUT things just started to get worse, then he would talk on the phone for hours and he would not let me listen, and he would get TONS of ''private calls" and nobody would answer. until one time i went to go spend the night over at my mom's house and the next morning i check the phone and there were like 5 calls from this "lisa" at 11:30 at night. so i call over and it was the voice of a young girl and i asked her why was she calling so late at night, but she said it was a wrong number, of course i did not believe her 100% but then i told my husband and he said it was he's friends' sister.

I was in love so love makes you believe a lie. so months passed by and i thought everything was over but i was WRONG, i check on my husband's phone and there were ALOT of "her" phone calls!!! I was soo mad i decided to leave the house, but then he just told me it would be fine and he was NOT cheating on me and that girl was from where he worked. Then one night when he was all drunk i was in the room with my son and i heard that he was dialing someone. so i wait till he finishes then when he left i went over and pressed "redial" and it was "her" phone number, so i get into a big argument with him and i leave thehouse but like 3 days he goes to my house and tells me that he loves me and he does not want me to leave , and he wants to be with his son, so i go back.

then last week i call "her" and she answeres and i ask her "why do you call my husband??" and we argued but then she started telling me all he said about me!! He had told her that he has cheated on me soo many times that he lost count, and that he was only with me for his son, and what hurt me more is that he said that he we were going to divorce on January when i turn 19 cause he is going to give mi Child Support. But i was devastated when i found out that she was "his" illusion, he's crazy about being "her" first one, and he's got it all planned and he told her he loves her and he wants to have a serious relationship and he loved her since the first day he saw her, and that he treats her like a princess and he's always thinking of her!!! I told my husband and he denys everything I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO maybe my mom was right, I just want to know what do yall think "does he love me??" or does he love her????????

Go talk to your mom and get a lawyer asap!

I broke up your post into paragraphs so it is easier to read - that way you may get more replies.

I think you need to leave this guy and talk to a lawyer about child support payments. I realise you love him but he lies and cheats and that will be unlikely to change.

well yes my mom would accept me at her house but he does not let me go very easy, I love him very much and i cant say NO whenever he's over there begging me to go back with him, but then i remember that "that" girl said he only wanted to be with his son not me. so i get very confused

Welcome to enotalone Brianna19!

Sorry to hear about your marriage.

I think NJRon is right, talk to your mom and then go get a lawyer.

You're way too young to suffer through such a horrible marriage (although, no one should suffer through this.) You're young and beautiful, you can find someone much better who would love and adore you. Don't settle for this scum, let him go.

Get a good lawyer and make sure you get child support from him.

so nobody thinks keeping up with this relationship is right for me??

so nobody thinks keeping up with this relationship is right for me??

But i love him VERY much and i dont want my son to suffer the consecuenses

so nobody thinks keeping up with this relationship is right for me??

I surely do not think it is the right thing to do. I read your post initially and then again after DN paragraphed it for you.

It is time to get out of this , get legal counsel for the child support issues and other issues at hand.

You do not deserve to be treated this way. He does NOT deserve you and YOU deserve so much better.

But i love him VERY much and i dont want my son to suffer the consecuenses

Both you and your son will suffer more consequences by staying with this "guy" than by moving on with your life. You are the role model here. Do you want your son to grow up learning that he can treat women like his "dad" does?

But i love him VERY much and i dont want my son to suffer the consecuenses

This man obviously does not have love for you. Don't stay with someone that doesn't love you and treats you this way. I think your son will suffer more if you stayed with this man. Get yourself a lawyer and get things in order.

But he doesn't love you.

And the consequences your son would suffer if you say with this guy (who will only treat you badly) will be far greater than if you leave him and get your life together.

brianna, this guy is an abuser. He will never treat you right, and most likely never treat your son right. You owe the both of you a better life than that.

But he doesn't love you.

 

And the consequences your son would suffer if you say with this guy (who will only treat you badly) will be far greater than if you leave him and get your life together.

 

brianna, this guy is an abuser. He will never treat you right, and most likely never treat your son right. You owe the both of you a better life than that.

but if he does not love me then why does he BEG me to stay with him and whenever i leave the house he always makes me go back???????

Because he is a control freak.

Because he is a control freak.

I guess he is; that girl also told me that he got soooo jealous whenever he found out he had a boyfriend, so he's trying to control her and me! I just dont know what to. I love him very much! i gave away everything to be with him, i even desobeyed my mom and my family!

Because he thinks you belong to him.

Like his car, his house, his tv. You're a possession.

Make sure you erase your history from your browser and, when you can do so peacefully when he is not around, get your child and go to your mom's. Talk to her about it. She seems like she is aware of the situation. Listen to her.

And remember, you may have gone against your families wishes, but they really do love you and will be there to help and support you. YOu just have to ask them to help.

Be strong.

It sounds like your mom is still willing to be there and help you even after you disobeyed her and did what you wanted. That says something right there. You won't be alone. However, this guy sounds like he just wants to have someone to control. He lied to your face many times. That isn't love at all. He'll never be the type of guy a girl wants to keep. He'll keep cheating and moving on.

The consequences will come if you stay with him. Who knows what will happen. You dont want your son around that type of trouble. Crazy girls calling him...knowing he's married and has a child. Getting your son...and yourself away is for the best!

How old is he by the way?

This guy is a creep and he sounds really immature. I am so sorry that he's lied to you and cheated on you so much. You really deserve someone better who will treat you good and be faithful to you. Your mom must have known what this guy was really about and it sounds like she was just trying to protect you from him.

You need to leave him. You and your son are not in a good situation. It will hurt for a while, but then you will be able to move on and find someone good.

I agree with the above posters, but I wanted to add that it'd be a good idea to get tested for STDs. If he's been around the block as much as you say, you never know what you might have.

This guy does NOT love you, no matter how much he tells you how much he wants you to stay. If you leave him, that's a consequence for his behavior, something he's clearly not used to. He wants to have his little lady at home and all his little hoes on the side. Go to your mom, tell her that you should have listened to her, and ask for her help. Get out of this relationship immediately; this is not the kind of "man" your son needs to look up to.

Good luck.

I agree with the above posters, but I wanted to add that it'd be a good idea to get tested for STDs. If he's been around the block as much as you say, you never know what you might have.

That is an EXCELLENT idea!

Hey Girl,

Welcome to enotalone!

This is quite a sad story. All of the previous posters are right. A guy who lies to you, cheats on you, and puts your sexual health (and thereforeeee your child's future!) at risk, does not love you.

His words are very easy to say, he begs for you to stay, but he does not respect you or this marriage.

Don't you want to be loved back? Treated with respect?

Do you want your son to grow up thinking it's OK to treat women this way?

Honey, you are just a child. You have your own child to think of here. You deserve so much more.

It sounds like your mom is still willing to be there and help you even after you disobeyed her and did what you wanted. That says something right there. You won't be alone. However, this guy sounds like he just wants to have someone to control. He lied to your face many times. That isn't love at all. He'll never be the type of guy a girl wants to keep. He'll keep cheating and moving on.

 

The consequences will come if you stay with him. Who knows what will happen. You dont want your son around that type of trouble. Crazy girls calling him...knowing he's married and has a child. Getting your son...and yourself away is for the best!

 

How old is he by the way?

He is 23 years old

If he does not love me then why did he chose me to be his wife instead of all those girls he went out before me??????????

Maybe because of the baby possibly? I'm not really sure about that. Just because a man marries you doesn't mean he's going to be faithful...it just means he has control of you.