Thinking about the future... some "complications".

So, most all of my life I have felt very certain that I did not like children and that I was not interested in having any. However, lately I have begun to think about it more positively. I'm still quite young, 24, so I have time. It may just be that ALL of my female relatives of childbearing age(as in all 8 of them), even the ones younger than me, have children(some have two already!). I look on sites like myspace and see all the girls I went to school with with their babies and happy little families and I can't help but feel a pang of envy. I just sat at our early thanksgiving dinner last week and observed the children and played with a few. I can feel my mindset starting to change.

Now that I've stated this, it's important for me to say that I am NOT actively trying to get pregnant. My way of thinking has simply changed to if it were to happen by accident now, it wouldn't be the end of the world or a catastrophe the way it would have been in my younger years(believe me I had quite a few "scares" and they were just that... VERY scary).

On to my issue though. My boyfriend(age 26) has a "problem". He has genital herpes. This bothers me because I'm not quite sure how we could go about actually "trying" in the future when we WERE ready because of the risk of infecting me... We have protected(barrier protection, a condom) sex every single time because neither of us wants to risk my infection. But how does one go about "trying" like this without having to implement outside tools(a turkey baster comes to mind... not a nice thought). As if it doesn't already take some people years to conceive the normal way without having to use "tools"... it's somewhat disheartening.

Like I said, this isn't an active worry, but one that I've begun to think about as I come closer in age to my ideal "time" for these things. Thoughts?

Not really sure... I wouldn't wanna mess around with that... have you talked to you bf about the child thing? Maybe you two can talk to a doctor and see what their options are for something like this?

I think you should talk to a dr. when your ready to have children and they can help you come to a decision.

Yes, you will need to talk to an OB/GYN before getting pregnant.

He may be able to take medication (like Valtrex) to reduce risk of transmission if he does not already. Or you can do in-vitro.

Delivery would be done by c-section so that it is not passed onto the child during delivery.

Anyway, your change in views are normal - most of my friends did not want children until their mid-late 20's or beyond when they had thought they never would. Myself I want them one day, but often have cycled through stages where I want them more than others though it has usually been in my long term goal to have them eventually!!!

RayKay is right about using drugs like Valtrex, with the right drugs to suppress the HSV virus, (Acyclovir, valacyclovir , etc) having unprotected sex with someone who has herpes can be done with a lower rate of transmission, so long as you always use protection when there is an active outbreak.

You may actually be able to deliver vaginally when you have herpes so long as you are not in an active outbreak, as a mom who has contracted herpes before pregnancy actually passes antibodies to her fetus during pregnancy that can actually protect the baby during delivery from contracting the virus. Less then 1% of infants born to HSV+ moms contract the virus- so long as mom is not in an active outbreak during delivery. However, damage to a newborn caused by the HSV virus can be devastating, including brain damage, seizures, poor sucking reflex/poor feeding, etc. If you are uncertain if you are having an active outbreak cultures can be done 24-48 hours before your due date (or when the cervix begins to dialate but you are in the latent stages of labor and not actively laboring- for some this occurs a week to 10 days before actual delivery) to confirm whether or not you are having an outbreak.

Signs other than obvious lesions signaling a potential outbreak include tingling in your fingers and toes, burning or pain in your extremities or genital area.

Contracting herpes during pregnancy can risk passing the virus through the placenta to the fetus and can result in miscarriage or preterm labor, so you'll definitely want to be protected during the pregnancy.