My ex and I got back together but!!!

[baddasslegend92]

I was in a LD relationship.We started being together on New Years.After a couple of month things was going well between us,but then all of a sudden she told me she needed time apart because of her job blah blah blah...Make a long story short she broke up with me on Valentines day and I was so hurt.So when I came back home I decided to do the NC with her.She contacted me yesterday and wanted to get back together because she told me she loved me and couldn't stop thinking about me.So I decided to give it another try.That night when we talked I asked her while we was not together did she have sex with anyone.She hesitated and said yes, With one of her brokers, I was like ??Of course I am hurt all over again, because now it seem like she left me just to get a piece of and then want to run back to me.What I want to know from u guys is should I take her back???I mean I am so hurt by this.Even though we was not togther I feel like she still cheated on me.Would I be able to trust her again??Please help.

[baddasslegend92]

By the way this all happened ina two week period!!!

[ButterflyWrists]

to be honest with you, if it doesnt work 1st time, then u shouldnt let it happen again.. i'd leave her, and just say look, u've hurt me, i cant stay with u.. thell her how she makes u feel...

But dont let her controle u, and use u as a fall back!!!

[Jetta]

It's the Ross and Rachel "We were on a break!" thing. Well you were broken up, you said it yourself "we got back together." Now yes I feel this way about my ex husband. It grossed me out to know he was with another woman. But we are divorced, and yes I'm trying to get back together so I did tell him how I felt grossed out by it even though it was technically not cheating.

 

You have to work through your feelings, share them with her (calmly), and if you truly want to work this out you'll have to release this. Technically it wasn't cheating, but did she plan this? Talk to her and find out, then you can base your decision on reconsiling or not on her answer. Maybe it just happened to be timed well. We all are attracted to people throughout relationships, whose to say she became attracted before breaking up?

 

It is kind of complicated but you have to talk to her find out the real timing and make your feelings known to her. It's really up to you if you want to work through it or not. It's possible.

[ebsmith1]

I was with someone else after my ex broke up with me. I wish that I hadn't been, but he was with someone else too. If we get back together, I hope we can both get over that. Sometimes you do stupid things when you aren't sure of what you want in life. Two weeks is a short time, but if that's a deal breaker for you, then this wouldn't work anyway. If you really love her and want to be with her, you'd get over it.

[Meow18]

Honestly, if you don't think you can forgive her, then you shouldn't take her back. If you take her back, that's like agreeing to forgive her and move on with the relationship.

 

If it's always going to be in the back of your head, then that's not fair to either of you. She didn't technically cheat, but I can understand why you are hurt and you have every right to feel that way.

 

It sounds like maybe she broke things off to try to pursue somebody else. Valentine's Day wasn't even a whole month ago.. She had to have known something would happen with this guy.

 

But, at least she broke things off with you first. You have to give her credit for that..

 

But maybe now it's something she really regrets doing and can't believe she would break up with a guy like you over this.

 

You are in a tough position because I can definitely understand why you are hurt and why you have doubts of being back with her. But trust me, it's not worth it to be in a relationship where you always have something in the back of your head that the other person did to you.

[baddasslegend92]

It's just so hard for me right now.It just keeps playing in my head!!!She live in VA and I live in GA and she wants to drive down to see me...She said she was vomerable and thats why it happened.She wants me to forgive her,and for some reason she is so scared that im going to try to get back and cheat on her.

[onelittleladybug]

I can relate to how you're feeling. Its really hard to accept what the other person does when you are apart when you didn't want to break up in the first place. But the thing is, you were broken up and that means she could do whatever she wants and so did you. Another thing is - you should NEVER ask questions if you're not ready to hear the answer and be ok with it.

 

My advice to you is to take your time and don't rush back. Talk about everything. Let her earn your trust again but don't make too hard on her. Most likely you are feeling bad about this because for you the reality of the breakup had not sunk in yet. Keep in mind that its possible that she did this to try to forget you. I did after my breakup only 6 weeks in. I think my ex knows about it and I'm sure it wasn't easy for him even when he was the dumper.

[lull65]

My partner told me he does not love mr but cares about me very much, any chance he could love me again?? We are currently separated.

[Meow18]

My partner told me he does not love mr but cares about me very much, any chance he could love me again?? We are currently separated.

 

I would make your own thread, that way you can get more responses.

 

But, to answer your question, it's hard to say. Normally when couples lose love for each other, it's for a reason and if the other person doesn't want to work on it, then no, it won't work.

[baddasslegend92]

Just an update???She drove all the way from VA to Ga just to tell me that she loves me and that I am the only one for her.She was so hurt about what she did to me and I could see it in her eyes.I love her very much and I did take her back.Since we been back togther we have been so happy.I am still scared but without the NC I think none of this would of been possible.thank you guys so much for you advice.I am truly in love with this woman and she is also inlove with me.

[Dr.Amore]

Let me make one thing clear "DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME". If a girl sleeps with someone in that short amount of time the first thing to come to mind is . If she did it once she will do it again. History repeats it self my friend take this from someone who's been there done that.

 

On the side note women are the experts in playing mind games effin with your head, they have the power cause they have the cutcheee. Men are good at cheating but no where near as sneaky as women. Do what ever you feel in your heart but im telling you play with fire your gonna get burned.

 

My two penny's