What a way to wake up on a Sunday morning

[Gracelove]

So I'm sleeping in my bed. And I hear all of this knocking on my door. It gets louder and louder.

I already know it's my mom, I make the mistake of getting up and opening the door.

She says something like, "we have an hour, we can make it to the 9:00".

I realize that she's talking about going to chruch. I was pretty sure I told her the night before that I wasn't going but I could be mistaken.

Anyways I tell her I'm not going, she tells me I am. I go to get back in the bed, she takes all of the covers off of the bed. And then she starts following all over the house pulls on my night gown.

I told her that she's acting really immature, not respecting my boundaries, and that she wouldn't be treating anyone else this way but she didn't care.

And it's just so frustrating because it's like everytime I get happy about life, and make improvements I have to deal with crap like this.

I mean, no means no. She's so used to being controlling though.

Following me all over the house and pulling on my clothes is just ridiculous.

Now I'm crying. Isn't that great. My eyes are filled with tears.

I had so sit and listen to my parents talking about crap for about 30min.

They just don't respect my space at all. It's extremely frustrating.

It's amazing I'm not an alcoholic living in this house.

Now I'm stressed. So stressed .

It's like they're so insensitive. Just because I stopped taking my medicine, it doesn't mean that I miraculously (sp?) no longer have depression or post traumatic stress disorder.

I still have to manage the whole stress thing because if I get too stressed I start having all of the symptoms again. And the symtoms are horrible.

And whenever we have talks they strongly imply that things were good before I came to live with them.

What am I suppose to say to that? I don't know what to say.

It's not like I'm dying to live with them. I would have left so long ago if I had the money. I live in on of the most expensive places in California, and unfortunately I can't afford to live anywhere else right now.

I don't know, maybe I should just move back to Alabama for a while.

But the last time I was there I felt kind of depressed.

What do you guys think I should do?????

[annie24]

how old are you? did you used to live alone? why did you move back home?

[Beyondthesea]

Why don't you get a job and move out? Are you really young?

 

If not, make the change.

[Gracelove]

Hey There Annie!!!

 

I'm 23 year old. My moving home was suppose to be temporary.

 

I moved home to receive therapy and finish up my last few college courses.

 

I was raped and diagnosed as having depression, PTSD, and anxiety disorder.

I was pretty much a complete wreck and my parents could/would no longer pay for the therapist I had in Alabama where I was living at the time.

 

I was only suppose to be living here for 2-3 months, until I was able to complete my classes.

 

During that 2-3 month period I started working as a temp. so that I could make money and get used to working and being around people (which was a really hard thing for me to do, because after being raped I didn't feel safe around other people).

 

Anywho, I was preparing to return to Alabama when my apartment was destroyed by a tornado.

 

At first my parents told me everything would be okay and that they would get me another apartment down there.

But once I was offered a full-time position where I was working in California, they changed their mind, and decided to completely drop me financially.

 

I have a couple choices though.

~Save up money for the next few months, and move to Alabama

~Get a second job in California, save money, and get my own place

~Get a second job in California, save money, and live with parents until boyfriend moves out this way

Hey There Beyond the Sea!!!

I would love to move out, but would need a second job (I don't get paid enough where I work now to find a place to stay).

I am in the process of looking for a second job, and have been for a while

[Beyondthesea]

Why don't you just find one good job that pays well enough that you could live on your own? I know your parents won't foot the bill financially but darling, that shouldn't really be an issue in my opinion.

 

You've come so far with therapy and with everything, now is the time to start standing on your own two feet and do what you have to do to be self sufficient.

 

I moved out by myself when I was 19. It was the best thing I ever did. I went to school part time and worked full time.

 

When your parents are too in your space, it's time to move out.

[Daddy Bear]

I live in California, too. Even the most expensive of neighborhoods have less expensive ones not very far away, and there are websites like link removed where you can find an apartment to share with another girl. Maybe you'd feel less trapped and more hopeful if you checked one of those sites out and saw the options that are available to you.

[annie24]

good idea SB - what about looking for a roommate and using public transportation instead of a car, if possible.