To ask or not to ask that is the question!!??

[munchies]

Hi,

 

Been seeing this girl kind of on a casual/friendly basis for about a month now. Think we have met about 5 or 6 times - just going for walks, watching a film and so on. But nothing has happened. But last night I invited her over to watch a film and it ended up that we watched the film and I expected her to want to go but she stayed for another couple of hours and we just chatted and watched a bit of TV. Ok later on we both sent a text at same time basically saying the same thing - basically we both wanted to kiss. I would have certainly done so but she had mentioned before that she was not quite sure after just now getting over her last relationship.

 

So it appears we both like each other. My dilemma is however should I ask her if she is also dating anyone else or interested in doing so? I would not be comfortable if she was but I do not know if it is normal practice here in the UK.

 

Thanks

[Day_Walker]

I think that before you ask if she is dating then you should kiss her. Do not express your desire to kiss her, you need to kiss her.

[chai714]

I think that before you ask if she is dating then you should kiss her. Do not express your desire to kiss her, you need to kiss her.

 

Day_Walker is right. Less talk, more action.

 

Also, it might help to read up on body language. I'm almost certain she was giving you signals that it's okay to bust a move on her. Now that she explicitely told you "kiss me" then you ought to listen to her.

[adahy]

'Day_Walker' is absolutely right. Don't think about it..be decisive. I'm not sure how old you are, be we all had to learn this.

Sometimes I do say, "I want to kiss you"...but I say it as I'm going in for the kiss. That's polite enough I think...gives her oh, about half a second to think about it

By voicing your desire openly first, now there are unnecessary expectations and pressure. That's how it is for me anyway...and I'd much prefer a spontaneous kiss to a planned, calculated/cold one.

[confused25]

If I were you I'd just ask her straight out if she's dating anyone else, and if not, would she want to take your relationship a step higher. Maybe she's just waiting for you to take the intiative first. Go for it!!

[finewhine]

KISS HER! Oh, gee, just kiss her. She ain't staying at your house to keep warm - she wants some action. Now do it, homie!

[munchies]

Thanks for advice so far. Hindsight is a wonderful thing I know I should have kissed her now. But honestly I was fearful that if I did so and she was not on same wavelength then I might have ruined a good friendship.

 

And I was trying to read body language but she was confusing!! Suppose should have taken the hint that she stayed a lot longer than she needed to after film at finished.

 

So now I have to be careful and not and as you would say plan to kiss her, just still has to be natural.

 

But I think I should kiss her then maybe ask her the next time we meet if she is dating or looking to date anyone else.

 

Another possible dilemma is whether to ask her out for valentines day. I personally do not 'agree' with the day but then she may. But I think there is another thread on that topic.