cry_baby Posted May 24, 2007 Share Posted May 24, 2007 oh boy, i'm back.. like a month later.. here we go again! DAY ONE (well in 18 min it will be... ) i did this for two months before and it didn't heal me one bit. i'm hoping this time will be more sucessful. it has to be!!! What happen was the 2 months absolutely NC? and did you keep busy or LET yourself think about your ex? Link to comment
MsBear Posted May 24, 2007 Share Posted May 24, 2007 Day 18 My ex, you'll wait and see This time I have decided that Im not tolerant for anyone to walk on me, fill me with self doubt , make me feel bad about myself ! Link to comment
annonannon Posted May 24, 2007 Share Posted May 24, 2007 Day 4 Not a bad day today but not great either. Found I couldn't concentrate at work again becasue of the anger making an appearance in the mind again. I have sorted through a load of my old stuff and found everything that directly links to her and placed it all in a box that is now firmly out of reach. Have to admit there were a few tears when i read the cards with "I'll always love you" written in them. She probably will... i'm a pretty great guy! I'm going to join the gym tomorrow I hope... it'll be good becasue there are a few of my friends go and it'll be good to get back into hanging out with them again now i have so much god damn time on my hands! Got six weeks to make me look like a sex god before my holiday. No contact at all today... feel ok but every second thought is about her still - something i need to break. Now lets see if i can get to sleep... Link to comment
cry_baby Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Day 2, thought I saw her walking by the cafe I was at, texted her and said, saw you walking by.... STUPID STUPID, that whole night I was seeing her everywhere!! Oh man I am helpless Link to comment
Aldo25 Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Ok...I'm almost embarrassed to admit this, but here's my third attempt at NC. Since where I am it's midnight I will start Day 1. Here we go again... Link to comment
Knightm29 Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Day two starts today. Feel a bit down today but I think I am just tired, did not sleep too well last night. Three day weekend coming up so plenty of time to enjoy myself and catch up on sleep! Link to comment
Kathinoz Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Hello, I'm not doing so well and its only been three days! I sent him a text, I sent him the last text that he sent me, it just said Ok and included my pet name that he used to call me. I wanted to remind him that I'm here. I didn't expect him to answer and he didn't. I have hardly eaten in three weeks. I still feel ill in the stomach. I don't understand me!! He was horrible to me!! He is my first thought in the morning, I wonder what he is doing all day and he is my last thought at night. Weekends are the worst because we spent them together... I should be dancing and singing in the street at being free from him but yet I miss him??!! Ok.. I will keep going and try not to be so weak. Link to comment
Knightm29 Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Hello, I'm not doing so well and its only been three days! I sent him a text, I sent him the last text that he sent me, it just said Ok and included my pet name that he used to call me. I wanted to remind him that I'm here. I didn't expect him to answer and he didn't. I have hardly eaten in three weeks. I still feel ill in the stomach. I don't understand me!! He was horrible to me!! He is my first thought in the morning, I wonder what he is doing all day and he is my last thought at night. Weekends are the worst because we spent them together... I should be dancing and singing in the street at being free from him but yet I miss him??!! Ok.. I will keep going and try not to be so weak. Keep it going. I am guilty of remembering the good times only and have to keep on telling myself how miserable I was in the last year of the relationship. It will get easier. Its been 4 months since my break and I do have some real bad days but they are getting less and less Link to comment
annonannon Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 a quick question for you NC 'rule makers'... is it breaking NC to contact an ex's family member (parents, sisters, brothers etc) so long as you are not talking about your ex or asking them to pass messages along? Link to comment
thelonelydoll Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Well, I'm not a rule maker, but even if you don't talk about the ex, you are still indirectly staying in her life when you stay in the lives of family members. I would suggest you disappear from the ex's life entirely. Link to comment
annonannon Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 i see your point but is not a completely different relationship - one that hasn't necessarily ended with the end of the 'main' relationship? I guess that debate is for another thread anyway... just wondered what people thought about that in relation to NC? Link to comment
briant_9999 Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Day 31 of NC and going strong ! Thanks so much to everyone here ! Havent heard from her since she said "we both should move on". I pleaded with her on day 1...usual story, but not chasing her this time ! Turns out there was another guy involved as I suspected. Grass is always greener ! I have occasional weak days when I remember the good times but the other guy was the closure I needed. Finding my old self and my smile again which is great. Look after yourselves Link to comment
andy5128 Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Good to hear Briant.. Day 10 or 11 i think.. Not really making a conscious effort to count..! Not a bad day today really, it is payday so that always makes you feel a little better!! LOL A few things planned for the weekend to keep me busy.. Hope everything is well with everyone, as the days go by it does seem to get easier... take care, Andy Link to comment
MsBear Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Day 19 Exam paper was hard.... left my stupid folder in the exam hall aww what a stupid girl I am Not missing him, Im worrying bout my exams instead Link to comment
cry_baby Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Day 2, I texted her this morning just to say hi, cause I was in a panic mode, since it's the weekend and we always hang on the weekends. she text back said hi and left it at that..... I felt a bit better when I texted her but then feelt guilty. I also have to return a few things back to her but will not see her Link to comment
Kathinoz Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Day 2, I texted her this morning just to say hi, cause I was in a panic mode, since it's the weekend and we always hang on the weekends. she text back said hi and left it at that..... I felt a bit better when I texted her but then feelt guilty. I also have to return a few things back to her but will not see her I did that last night. I wanted him to think of me, we spent whole weekends together too, how could he just forget those times?? I spent the night on the sofa and every movies I watched involved people falling in love and living happily ever after! PFFFT! I shed some tears. I miss him dreadfully but you know what? He didn't reply. He doesn't miss me at all, he's still living his life and doing his thing. That kinda hurts and gives me strength to move on. By no means am I strong, I know it will get better and it will get better for you too! Stay strong! Link to comment
annonannon Posted May 25, 2007 Share Posted May 25, 2007 Day 5 Long day at work again... very distracted still and not concentrating much. Saw my ex in the restaurant from a distance. I'm not sure if she saw me or not but I felt I kept strong, kept my chin up and carried on as normal. Been thinking about her loads tonight too. One of my friends is getting married tomorrow and it has just brought back the memory of when i told my ex they were engaged about 18 months ago. She was so jealous... she wanted to marry me! Maybe I blew it by not asking her but it does turn out she can't have loved me like i deserve anyway so better now than 5-10 years down the line when married. A POSITIVE thing! No tears today either (lets see what the night time brings us though). ramblings over... good luck tomorrow everyone! Link to comment
Kathinoz Posted May 26, 2007 Share Posted May 26, 2007 Ah jeez.. I had a cry. I hate everything. I have to leave to meet my friend for coffee in about 5 minutes.. and I feel sick cos I don't want to see anyone. HE (my ex) text me.. "Morning" and the pet name he calls me.. I've told him since we are not together anymore he must stop calling me the pet name as it is a gesture of love and togetherness for me.. Makes me think he might care.. I didn't text him back. Link to comment
Aldo25 Posted May 26, 2007 Share Posted May 26, 2007 Day 1 (third attempt) is winding down. I feel pretty good, I keep telling myself I am a better person without her, and that she doesnt want anything to do with me (that makes me feel better too). I swear, this time I am going to hit the 30 day mark! Link to comment
Kathinoz Posted May 26, 2007 Share Posted May 26, 2007 OK, I'm quitting this challenge. I went to meet my friend for coffee and I have to drive past my ex's house to get there, theres no other way to many places I visit! Anyway, I hated seeing his car in the driveway, made me feel sick. I rang him when I got to where I was going and he suggested we have a coffee together later in the day. I agreed as long as it was in a coffee shop because I won't go to his place, too risky. I suggested he came to where I was. We used to go to this place every Saturday morning when we were together, it was one of our little rituals, it was always good. He came and met me a hour later, was a little bit awkward at first but we had a good chat. We didn't talk about how we were in the past or anything to dowith our relationship. Just chatted about stuff. He suggested we meet and do the same thing every Saturday morning, I dunno if it will happen for sure but I agreed at the time. Time to say bye came and he hugged me. And he hugged me. And he's still hugging me two minutes later... I told him he needed to practice the "friendship" hug cos friends don't hug for so long! He got turned on while we were hugging! He started talking about how good our sex life was and about the last time we did "it". I agreed it was very good and said "All good things must come to and end".(thats the reason we HAVE to meet outside and not at his place!) I didn't discuss it any further. Then we chatted and chatted, in between both of us saying, "Hey, I gotta go" but neither of us went anywhere. We hugged a few more times then I said, "Ok, time to go, talk to you next weekend" And I left. I'm not doing the challenge anymore because I think that staying friends and seeing my ex will actually make me stronger and I will heal faster. I will not go back to seeing him in a relationship again. I don't want to. We are able to chat about people we meet as long as we keep it to a minimum and not rave about them. I had my little dog with me and guys were talking to her and me of course, he was quite stunned! LOL It was fun! Good luck everyone who is doing this! So hold this feeling like a newborn Oh and freedom bursting through your veins You have opened up a new door So bring on the wind, fire and rain! Link to comment
bear12 Posted May 26, 2007 Share Posted May 26, 2007 okay, i'm starting over b/c my ex and i talked about taking a "break" from talking today so here we go. his bday is in a month and i do plan to send a card then so i have time to make the 30 day challenge and despite the fact that i've done this before, i AM going to get over him this time so that by the time i send the card i have absolutely no desire to be anything other than his friend... i can do this!!!.... alright. ready, set.... Link to comment
MsBear Posted May 26, 2007 Share Posted May 26, 2007 Day 20 Kinda feeling fed up w/ myself for being not motivated this time of the year Want to do so many things badly, want to fly high and fulfill my dreams... At some point of the day, there are things reminding me of him, it makes me feel sick and disgusted Link to comment
Advice Posted May 26, 2007 Share Posted May 26, 2007 Hi Ms Bear, sorry to hear your feeling fed up. It doesn't help, but the more you tell yourself your feeling fed up, the more fed up you feel. About 3 weeks after i broke up with ex, someone told me that i needed to do something because i was also down in the dumps and could not snap out of it. They suggested i do something that i had always wanted to do. I instantly replied but their is nothing i want to do without her. I then thought about this and decided that i had always wanted to go on a cruise. So i booked a 7 day cruise round europe. For the first time i was really excited and since then i got my head together and planned my sort term future. I did end up cancelling the cruise as circumstances with my ex improved but that was the turning point for me. Good luck and keep positive. Link to comment
annonannon Posted May 26, 2007 Share Posted May 26, 2007 Day 5 and a little bit Hi, after my post on Day 5 i received a couple of text messages from the ex - each have gone unreplied. First one asked if i was ok and she misses me (used a pet name for me too). The second asked why i wouldn't even reply to her - do i hate her that much? I have concluded that these text messages are an attempt to keep me as her saftey net and as such don't warrent a reply. I felt quite strong to be honest! No tears either! Link to comment
bar35 Posted May 26, 2007 Share Posted May 26, 2007 The Challenge was posted quite a while ago, I can't even remember if I took it then or not, but now I think that I must. I have been really messing myself up with myspace and that has got to stop. So here I go..Day #1. Link to comment
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