Where are the good ones?

[Belle]

I'm a little frustrated at my current state of affairs. I have 3 potential guys, none of which I really find all that potential anymore. 2 are entirely too young (one's 12 years younger) and the other is close to my age but overbearingly critical. It's funny how nice guys come accross until they get comfortable. Then you see the fangs.

 

I meet a lot of guys. I just feel like there's so few that I really want to date. And at this time of year, it's kind of getting me down.

 

I guess it could be worse. There could be no prospects.

[Lily04]

Hey,

 

Yeah I think you're thinking realistically, which is good....I'm the same way there's prospects but none i'm really into....except for one which i sorta ruined and at the same time don't see as being that compatible in the long-term anyway..

 

why is 'this time of year' more pressure for you to have a bf? how long have you been dating the guys? i'd suggest breaking it off if you don't think they're really nice people and you couldn't get along... better to be single than unhappy.

 

Lily

[Belle]

Hi Lily,

 

Yeah, there's something in the air around the holidays. I guess I'm just ready for a new start now and finding the pickins' slim.

 

I haven't agreed to really date any of them. I spend time with one guy as "friends" to see where it could go (the one closest in age) and another I spent NYE with. The third I'm still in teh flirting stages but already realize that it's not what I'm looking for. I want someone my age who gets it. Most of the guys that flirt with me or ask me out are too young and think I'm their age.

 

Don't worry, I'm not going to pick among them to find happiness. I'll just keep trucking til something better comes along.

 

Btw, you didn't ruin it if it didn't have long term potential.

[Lily04]

how old are you belle? i find it interesting that you tend to date younger guys! lol.

[Belle]

36. It's not a preference. People think I'm 25 so the 25 yo's ask me out. Guys my age look but never talk.

[Belle]

One post by Lily and I realize what's eating me. I've had so many opportunities and have squandered a few really good guys in pursuit of an ideal that doesn't exist. Too old, too young, too rich, too poor. I am friends with one of my lost opportunities. I realized on the top of a mountain in colorado a year later that I needed to give the guy a shot after waiting around for so long. I went back to find that he had met his soul mate about a month prior. We're friends, but he was pretty close to what I was looking for. And he was actually older. But I was flirting with several other guys that were slightly out of reach and totally took the guy for granted who clearly had feelings for me.

 

A word of advice to the girls who may get a lot of attention. Don't wait until you're 36 to figure out what's important and what you want. The good opportunities dwindle.

[Lily04]

Hey Belle...

 

I'm glad I could help, even marginally. I'm sure you innately knew what the issue was for a while... but just needed some prodding. Were you ever married? The fact that you're 25 is actually an asset i'd think... more guys for you! I think the fact that most guys in their late 30s are likely already married though, or divorced, may make it tougher for you.. just make sure you're hitting the right places to meet people, and i'm sure with your looks and personality, you'll be fine. Don't keep regrets...just keep moving forward. =)

 

Lily