This girl is wierd.

[Steve_B]

Hello!

 

I got this new job about 5 weeks ago, and managed to get a girls phone number, lets call her "J". Anyway this is the situation.

 

We do NOT talk at work at all, havn't said one word to each other. This i do not know why, i have tried so many times, saying "hi, how are you?" and all i get is a "hi" back and thats it!

I started texting her and she texts back. My messages are always long and informative, hers are always short and doesnt ever really answer any questions i asked. e.g.

 

Hi, how was your day? you out tonight?

 

Reply: yeah u? etc etc

 

We talk for hours on the phone sometimes talking about random crap like work and clubs and partys etc.

I told her i want to take her out on a date, she said yeah! so i'm like "woohoo" but then she sends a magical text message saying "sorry i dont want to get hurt again" just a day before the arranged date so i give her loads of sympathy, we did eventually have a drink for about 2mins when she saw me in a bar but she was with friends so it wasnt a date.

She always asks loads of questions like "Why do you like me?". Its always Why this, why that???

 

I told her i find her attractive and want to get to know her. but she would reply saying something like "i dunno why im mingin".

 

we have been texting each other the past couple of days, read on:

 

J: Have a gd xmas?

Me thanks you?

J: yeah, had 2 doubles and wine later so its pretty merry haha.

Me: I havn't stopped drinking since friday and am still hammered!"

J: haha, whos phone are you using?

Me: My bros, you out on new years?

J: Yeah im out new yr why?

Me: Cool, where abouts you of to?

J: why aint u usin ur phone? probably town.

Me phone is broken. Can i come jump on you at new years?

J : Why you wanna jump on me?

J : Why do you wanna jump on me?

Me : You text the same msg twice there J!

J : Couse i wanna know.

Me: Because your luvely jubely and its xmas

J: Ring ring Ring

Me: Does that mean you want me to ring you eh?

J : haha, Who knows!

J : Go on ring

 

So i call her and she answers and says shes hammered, asks if i have a big penis and tells everyone i do Kung Fu around her then hangs up on me. Sounded pretty abusive.

 

i text later saying

 

Me: Think i have changed my mind! ( i sent this because she made me angry by hanging up on me)

J: changed your mind about what?

J: changed your mind about what?

J: changed your mind about what?

J: changed your mind about what?

Me: Nothing.

J: if you dont like me whatever steve.

Me: Its not that, don't worry.

J: changed your mind about what?

J: changed your mind about what?

Me: Your moddy with me now aint ya?

J: I just think if you dont like me thats fine.

Me: Would you be bothered if i did like you?

J: Why does that matter?

Me: If i liked you and you are not bothered about it then there is no point in me liking you eh?...

J: Well you dont like me.

Me: I like you more then most people.

J: yeah but y?

Me: I think your amazing, and i want to see you on new years.

J: And y is that?

Me Because i want to kiss you! So can i?

J: Can u wot?

Me: can i see you on new years?

J: c me to kiss me? i dont c y u would wanna do that

Me: I just want to spend a moment with you on new years.

J: If you wanted to see me so bad you would try harder.

Me would come see you right now.

J: and how would you do that?

Me: doesnt matter how but i would, can i see you on new years or not?

 

Then it got late and didnt receive any texts, so guessing she went to sleep as i am about to, hopefulyl text tomo.

 

You rekon this girl is interested at all? Is she in to me, or just a little interested or maybe just in it to get chased? I noticed she never turns me down. She has NEVER gave me a compliment about anything to me when i give her loads, because shes fishes for them. If she wasn't interesed surely should would of told me to sod of by now eh? She went out to a weekend once and requested a pic of me to show to her friends. thats a good thing right?

 

Sorry about the long story, your views?

[AwdreeHpburn]

She's not turning you away because she's YOU GOT IT...into being chased.

 

Don't chase her or talk to her for like 3 days...and see what happens...

[DropToZero]

I know this will seem like a short response...but this girl is either really really really GOOD...or really really really BAD. I know, impossible, but what I get out of it is...she's either really experienced, doesnt want to get hurt, and wants to be sure you're really into her. Or...she's really inexperienced, and isn't sure if you like her, feels really unconfident about herself(b/c she doesnt know why you like her), and she's just playing dumb.

 

I know whatever I say...you're going to go on with it anyways because you're going to want to know what's gonna happen between you two. So...you want my advice, dont "try" too hard (like she wanted)in a sense...but ...make a move. Get with her, whenever(like new years eve like you said)...and just kiss her when the timing's right. Flirt like hell, talk, laugh, drink, and make a move when you're staring into one another's eyes.

 

Or...which I know you probably won't do...you can just stay away, avoid the whole thing, and go find someone else.

[redandblack]

This girl is trouble. If these are the types of responses and interactions you're getting with something as simple as this, imagine how it will be when something really important (to you) comes up. If she can't act responsible and serious for even a minute, she is a joke and she takes you as a joke. Find someone who respects you, man.

[yeawutever]

Damn that girl is mess up in the brain. If she can't take dating and getting to know you like a civilized and mature being, then a) she's either those men haters who got overly hurt, b) she has the mental capacities of a 5 year-old child, c) was born with a mental disformity or d) is inexperienced along with being asexual also

 

Drop her and go find girl who's normal.

[BlueWolf]

Well here's my take on her:

She is either crazy or she has read way too many books on how "unpredictability" turns men on, and thus is trying WAY too hard to be unpredictable.

 

So here is how you are supposed to go about this. Either

a) Send mixed signals yourself and see what happens (that advice for not talking to her for three days is good, btw, take it!!!)

 

b) Completely leave the nutcase. Don't even play hard to get. Just leave her. With nothing in mind about dating or relationships. She does sound like trouble... One of the best qualities in a girl is stability - she's anything but...

 

 

Oh, for future reference, never confess your feelings to a girl. Always keep her in suspense.

 

It's just my intuition but I REALLY think she's been reading books on how to handle men and is overdoing it, while not having ANY real life experience.

[Steve_B]

Interesting views.

 

Her background: The silent type at school, only a few friends, parents divorced, tells people she has no father.. i once said she shouldn't care what people think becasue she doesnt like eating in front of people, and she slammed the phone down saying i was insulting her...

A person at work asked her if she met anyone on that weekend, and she snapped at him saying "WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?".

 

think i'm just going to say it wont work out or something and stay clear. Pitty because she is so pretty. arrg such a shame!! now i have to go looking again...

[BlueWolf]

Yeah, I'd leave. I don't think it is the type of person anyone wants a stable relationship with.

 

I know what you mean, it has happened before where a girl is attractive but her life is totally screwed up.

[DizzyDoris]

She sounds like hard work! You've already done the hard part and told her you like her, now i would tell her that she is confusing you with the way she acts. I find it odd that you work together, you speak out of work, but have no contact actually at work. Thats kinda weird!

 

Ask her to be honest and if she's interested to go for a drink so you can get to know each other better. Be prepared though if things do progress for a high maintenance girlfriend lol

[sddeaston]

Sounds like she is extremely insecure and needs reassurance from you about herself. I am not going to tell you its impossible to have a good lasting relationship with her, but it will be turbulent and you will have to overcome many obstacles.

 

But what relationship isn't that way?

[Steve_B]

right just told her

"Hi, I told you i like you and your confusing me because of the way your acting, Can you be honest with me and tell me if there is any point in me liking you? If you don't reply i'm taking it as you want me to leave you alone and i won't bother anymore"

 

Waiting for her reply, if she does..

[Steve_B]

well she text back, over about 10 messages i asked her to tell me if she liked me and she wouldn't say. I replied,

"im going to have to guess then, and as you said no to me to taking you out and as you refuse to see me around new years and also not telling me wether you like me or not im gonig to leave you alone as that is what you made me think you want."

 

Good ridense?

[DizzyDoris]

Let her do the chasing now, she knows your keen and doesnt seem to be giving very good signals back to you im afraid. If she wants you now you've made it clear your backing off, if she's not in touch in the next couple of days cut your losses and move on. Plenty more fish in the sea, and by the sounds of it this one doesnt sound ready to be caught!

[redandblack]

well she text back, over about 10 messages i asked her to tell me if she liked me and she wouldn't say. I replied,

"im going to have to guess then, and as you said no to me to taking you out and as you refuse to see me around new years and also not telling me wether you like me or not im gonig to leave you alone as that is what you made me think you want."

 

Good ridense?

 

You did well. Stick to your guns. Good riddence, indeed.

[Steve_B]

she keeps on messaging me still, notifying she will be out on a girly night on new years. im going to leave it a while before i text her back.

 

She said she needs to tell me something tonight, the message looks like this "I will text you when i get online. i got something to say"

 

Now this can either be really good or really bad eh? *sigh*

[BlueWolf]

It can't be really bad because you are already contemplating leaving it all... so you have really nothing to lose.

[redandblack]

I don't know if I would even consider getting into a relationship with this girl, no matter what she says. She will probably try to repair things between you (but I still wouldn't get your hopes up). Unless she identifies her mistake, and takes action to change her habits, this will probably be a common occurrence in any future relationship between the two of you. I dated a girl like this once and, from start to finish, there were few times that I wasn't wondering why she was doing something, what she was thinking, how she felt about things, etc. She very obviously has a few maturity, experience, and communication issues going on, so beware! I say stay away.

[Steve_B]

well, this is what happened.

 

She asked me why i liked her... again. And then she started going on about how i shouldn't be with a girl like her.

 

"you shouldnt be with a girl like me steve, trust me"

 

so i took this as she wanted me to chase her, i just said

"nevermind if thats how you feel thats cool, ill see you around sometime"

 

Then she went mental and said "your unbelievable, the word * * * * wouldnt descibe you"

 

So im like "what?" And she said how as soon as she says something im like Bye! or something...

 

I just said i have a head ache and left her. Shes way immature and too far insecure for my liking and i dont want to go back there again.

[DinkyTeacup]

This girl is trouble. If these are the types of responses and interactions you're getting with something as simple as this, imagine how it will be when something really important (to you) comes up. If she can't act responsible and serious for even a minute, she is a joke and she takes you as a joke. Find someone who respects you, man.

 

I kind of agree with redandblack. She sounds really immature and irresponsible. You shouldn't waste your time. Find a mature girl who isn't going to drive you up the wall with silly nonsense.

[Siriana]

Yes, she's immature. A wast of time. Even if she wanted something with you, I suggest you to give up. She's all messed up. Not a way for a 19 year old to behave.

[CaliGirl77]

well, this is what happened.

 

She asked me why i liked her... again. And then she started going on about how i shouldn't be with a girl like her.

"you shouldnt be with a girl like me steve, trust me"

 

so i took this as she wanted me to chase her, i just said

"nevermind if thats how you feel thats cool, ill see you around sometime"

 

Then she went mental and said "your unbelievable, the word * * * * wouldnt descibe you"

 

So im like "what?" And she said how as soon as she says something im like Bye! or something...

 

I just said i have a head ache and left her. Shes way immature and too far insecure for my liking and i dont want to go back there again.

 

 

She was WARNING you! RUN!!!

 

I met a guy once and he told me, "I'm a real aXXhole", but was kind of laughing to me. So I think he's joking right? NO WAY!!! HE WASN'T!!!

 

Trust me, next time you'll know - - too many RED FLAGS with this one.

 

Like I said, RUN!!!!