Possible parental threat

[Nova Phoenix]

Okay, so me and my BF having been going out for over 2 months now. It's had a few bumps (mostly from me, lol), but all in all, it's been great fun.

 

Though my parents are causing a little concern for me. It seems everytime I mention staying over at his place for overnight or a whole weekend, they go all weird or "I don't know" over it. I'm almost afraid to tell them what my plan is because they will probably say something about it.

 

I don't know what their problem is with it (when they have one). I mean come on, surely they knew that eventually I'd start to leave the nest I've been in for 22 years. That I'd start being away from home more (albeit only with one person, but still). And if they don't know I'm gay by now, then...clearly I gave credit where it wasn't due.

 

See, I'm not financially- or transport-independent...yet, so I kinda rely on the olds to take me places, including to meet up with my BF (we meet downtown, hang out, then catch a bus back to his, thats usually the plan).

 

My BF knows about this, and suggested that I'm 22 and that they don't dictate anymore what I do or where I go or even when, where and who I stay over at places with (that's a mouthful). I'm thinking the same thing too.

 

Oh, and did I mention I'm an only child? Yep, it's the sad truth. Maybe that's why I'm babied by my....mother *sigh*. She's cool, but yeah, wish she'd just accept that I'm with a guy and am gonna see him often.

 

So yeah, anyone got anymore advice for me? I could really use it right now, thanks.

[FallingTooFast]

If your parents are driving you to go meet your boyfriend, then you're still under their control.

Get your licensce, or a car.

Get a job.

Get independent and then they'll treat you like you deserve to be treated.

Once there, you should be able to see him whenever you need. And if you're still with him (hopefully, you sound happy,) by the time you get your independence then you can tell your parents (just a precaution so you don't get kicked out if your parents are like that)

 

Good luck

[Hope75]

Hi There,

 

Well, I have a few suggestions that might help.

 

It might be awkward for your parents to drive you into town to meet your bf and know that you are going to sleep over with him and all the stuff that goes along with that...

 

It seems to me that what's making them (and you) uncomfortable is the fact that you are an adult, (at 22 able to make your own choices and be responsible for yourself) and yet at the same time, you are still dependant on them for a place to live and a ride around. That puts both of you in an awkward position.

 

Are you working?

 

If not, I would suggest you start thinking about that. A job is means to a car, and eventually, to a place of your own. At 22, you are quite old enough to start working your own way through things and learning to support yourself, even if it means paying rent at home and taking the bus with your own money, or getting an old junker for the time being.

 

You can do alot about this situation, if you put your mind to it.

 

Honestly, I don't blame your parents for being disapproving. It's time for you to get out there and start behaving like an adult in all aspects of life... not just crashing at your bf's place after getting a ride to meet him from Mom and Dad!

[Tigris]

I agree with everything Hope's said.

 

You need to be totally independent.

[LONESOUL]

I agree. You need to to show that you deserve to be treated as

an adult who can make his own decisions. It's about respect, I think. You need to earn it. Can't say I blame your folks too much right now. Maybe it's not as much about being with another guy as it is showing you are a responsible adult?

Take good care~

Lone

[MsLady]

Why haven't you told them you're gay? Judging from your post, it doesn't sound as if you have yet. If you want them to treat you like an adult, you're going to have to start making some adult choices. Are you ready?